What to do if you don't feel safe...

AnimalCrackers

Fresh ta Def
Feb 28, 2007
1,444
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In the interest of maintaining privacy, I won't go into much detail, but yesterday marked the THIRD time recently that a scary incident happened at my apartment complex. This most recent one was bad enough for me to call 911. The police did a terrible job of handling it in my opinion, so now I'm pretty nervous to be staying at my own apartment.

This town is supposed to be really safe. I was worried about moving to a bigger city because of the crime, but it turns out that it's just as bad right here! I'll be moving in June, but what should I do until then? I don't feel safe here. FH is buying a gun, and said he would teach me how to use it when he gets it. I hate guns, they scare me, but living here is starting to change my mind. I just don't know what to do, because sometimes I have to be here alone, and the parking lot is badly lit, amongst other concerns.

Has anyone else dealt with this? Am I just overreacting?
 
Always be aware of your surroundings-keep your door dead-bolted, and your windows locked. Also your cellphone next to you in bed.
 
^^^ can you elaborate on the scary incidents? Things that are causing physical harm or robbers? I always felt safer when my bedroom door had a lock...that might help as you will feel like you have a second line of defense when your guard is down at night.
 
its a good thing you are moving in june. you poor thing. you are not overreacting if you are truly scared.. do you live alone or does DH live with you? i'm nosy and want to hear details.. use the gun if you must!!
 
I hate being home alone(well realy just at night - sleeping) I always think I hear things, when I am really just imagining it! Luckily my df doesnt do any overnights anymore, but when he did... I always freaked myself out.
Really though that I has nothing to do with your situation as it seems as it is actually things happening? I agree I would like to know details. I dont know if I would ever get a gun though, wow that just seems so scary! Sadly the statistics are that the gun/a knife near/under the bed is more likely to be used against you than to protect you ( dont remember where I heard that but I think its true lol)
 
^To vaguely elaborate, they have involved forced entry. One involved someone the person knew (the one I knew about and called 911 for), the other two didn't. We aren't allowed to install deadbolts. We just have the doorhandle locks. FH lives with me, and we have a roommate, but they can't always be home with me.

I worded my first post poorly, if I had known about the other incidents while they were happening, I would have called the police then too! I'm really disappointed, because growing up, this town was always very safe. I never worried about walking alone at night, and lately I've been scared to go do my laundry alone.
 
when those things happened to me i programmed my local police number into my phone and slept with a maglight and a kitchen knife under my bed. i also made sure my animals were always in my room and couldn't be seen from the outside.
 
till June, try not to be alone. Use the buddy system for everything you do (ie; laundry, etc.). also a cop once gave me some really great tips when you are alone -
  • always walk in well lit areas
  • always keep your head up and shoulders back, walk "like a cop" if you will, arms slightly out to your sides, walk like you mean business
  • always look around you and make it obvious to others that you are aware and paying attention to all your surroundings. criminals are opportunists - they prey on people who seem not to be paying attention.
  • LOOK PEOPLE IN THE EYE. no one is going to pick a target who can identify them.
  • Carry yourself confidently and never look like you are scared or nervous. Adopt the attitude of "no one better mess with me".

not acting like a victim is a good way not to become one. always be alert.
 
Buy a taser! It's a little less intimidating if you are not used to the idea of a gun but it will absolutely protect you and get the job done. I get a little paranoid and spook easily so SO bought me one which I keep by my night stand along with some mace just in case. But agree with the others - always be aware of your surroundings, try to stay in well-lit places, carry a flashlight and some mace with you, etc.

This may not be possible since you are at an apartment but how about getting a motion sensored light installed in your new place possibly? Having a huge light flash nearby any entrances may deter people since they do not want to get caught.
 
There are different state laws but to my understanding, you do not need to be officially trained to use one. Of course with that being said, of course you should still research and follow any safety tips. I got mine a couple of years ago and I believe that once you receive the taser, you do have to register it with the site.

You can go here and poke around a bit to learn more: http://www.itaser.com/index.html
 
till June, try not to be alone. Use the buddy system for everything you do (ie; laundry, etc.). also a cop once gave me some really great tips when you are alone -
  • always walk in well lit areas
  • always keep your head up and shoulders back, walk "like a cop" if you will, arms slightly out to your sides, walk like you mean business
  • always look around you and make it obvious to others that you are aware and paying attention to all your surroundings. criminals are opportunists - they prey on people who seem not to be paying attention.
  • LOOK PEOPLE IN THE EYE. no one is going to pick a target who can identify them.
  • Carry yourself confidently and never look like you are scared or nervous. Adopt the attitude of "no one better mess with me".

not acting like a victim is a good way not to become one. always be alert.

These are great tips - I'm sorry this is happening to you OP, I live in a really safe place so I'm not in a good position to advise you but even so, I always lock my doors as soon as I walk inside the house, always keep windows shut, I also do a walk through to check locks before I go to bed. Try to keep curtains shut at night - when you have your curtains open and lights on but it's dark outside, people outside can see right into your place and can watch you.

A trick that I have used very occasionally if I have been uncomfortable with someone walking behind me is I always have my cell phone out and I pretend to be on the phone to someone (or actually call someone to chat to until I get to my car or my house or whatever).