What is your opinion of prenups?

M

muppy

Member
Nov 26, 2005
507
2
#1
ok, the whole jessica-nick saga got me thinking abt pre-nups...

Would you sign it? or have you signed one?

I think it is really sensitive to raise it before a marriage, it just seems like you are expecting it to end... but what if you have more than your husband to be.. (but not that rich that it doen't matter that much to you)... ?
 
#2
i think they're a good idea if both people are logical and realistic - proposing one to a hopeless romantic or someone that is quite sensative or has low self-esteem could end the marriage before it begins. i'm absolutely a proponent of them, even if both people earn equally at the time of marriage - you never know what the future holds.

we have a lot of really unrealistic ideas about marriage in most western nations, and we forget that a large part of marriage is merging two completely separate sets of finances. there definately needs to be a plan should they need to be split up again, unless you're both completely comfortable with a half-half situation (in which case, you'd probably want to sign something to that effect beforehand, which would make even that a prenup).

in my mind, they can save you the torture of a long, ugly divorce should it come to that, and there's no reason not to err on the side of caution.

can you tell i'm going in to law school?
 
#3
I have absolutely NO problem with prenups! If my husband and I were to ever get a divorce (God forbid!!!), I don't want anything of his! I've got my own, thank you!
 
#4
Sorry, I don't care who his family is, what he owns, I would never sign a pre-nup. And vice versa, I would never, ever make a man sign a prenup.

I have a friend who delayed her wedding for a year because she wouldn't sign a pre-nup her fiance's family tried to force on her. They finally gave in, and I'm so glad. They're truly in love.
 
#5
Absolutely not. If I don't trust the person I'm going to marry, to not f*ck me over if we got divorced, then they're someone I shouldn't be marrying.

I'm not exactly an overly sentimental girl, I just don't like the idea of a prenup. Even if I'm a CEO of a huge corporation, the person I marry is going to be someone I wouldn't mind forking over a big portion of my earnings to if we split up. Money isn't everything, yes it's nice- but love still beats it out in the long run, and I wouldn't disrespect my future partner by making them sign one. :smile:

Maybe I'll change my opinion if I truly am in that situation, but for now I'm anti-prenup. :-P
 
#6
I'm not for them. Because if you have no trust, why marry that person. I also know a laywer who is friends with my mom, he says they're VERY easy to get through in court. I.e. your former spouse might not get half but with a half decent lawyer, they won't walk away empty handed. So, I'm not for them because they're not 100% full proof.
 
#7
I don't see a problem with protecting what is yours before you are married. Especially if you own properties or a business. Obviously no one is looking into the future and seeing a divorce, or else they wouldn't get married. It is usually unpredictable. I guess I'm also more open to that as a child of divorce and seeing the long, expensive court battles that went on. I always wondered if things would've been less complicated had something have been signed. If you're each starting with an equal amout of assets, there isn't really a need. And also, my concern was for inheritance, but in most states that isn't considered something joint, unless the will specifically states that.
 
#8
I wouldn't do a pre-nup. I would really be insulted if someone asked be to do a pre-nup because in my opinion, its equivalent to someone saying "I don't really trust you 100% because I believe there is a slight chance you may turn out to be a golddigger who will screw me out of my money." Really, if a guy thinks there is a remote possibility that I would do that, then it means he doesn't really know me that well and he shouldn't be marrying me.

So basically, I see prenups as a sign of mistrust . . . neither person trusts the other with money. If you can't trust the person's intentions with money, how can you trust them with more serious issues like fidelity and honesty? If that's the case, then maybe getting married isn't the best thing to do.
 
#10
I'm all for it, I think that a lot can happen during the years and people can change. Of course no one wants this to happen, but it can :sad: I'd want to protect what was mine before the marriage and he could feel free to do the same :biggrin:
 
#11
I don't really see them for young people, unless one of them has enormous assets or a stake in a family business. If one just has a liklihood of success, that's not a good enough reason.

But for older people who have accumulated a lot or have children from a previous marriage, I think they are essential. Children's college funds and legacies need to be protected, as do the retirement funds of people who don't have many more working years left.
 
#12
We don't have a prenup because when we married we wre both students and hadn't much. All we have now is because we grow up together and put in hard work. I actually can't answer if I would sign or not because it was never an option for us with two poor students there wasn't much to fight about.
 
#13
I'm agianst prenups! For all of the good reasons stated above. Also I think that prehaps if people thought that when they entered into marriage that they would have to split half of everything (hey I think 50% should always be the split) that they would be a little more careful when getting married and not just rush to get divorced when everything didn't work out so easy. It would make them try harder to work things out.

Also those horny old guys would think twice about marrying those really young gold diggers bimbos too.

As for Nick and Jess while I love Jess, more power to Nick! I think he should get some of her earnings! When they got married she was a nobody and didn't have anything. It was during his 98 Degree days, so he was the one worth and making all the money. I also just watched a special on Jess and Ash and you know, her first real gig was after she started dating him and he had her be 98's warm up performer. You know if it wasn't for that break, who knows where and when her career may have started also the show Newlyweds was her big claim to fame and without Nick there would not have been a show! Without Jess getting so popular, where would Ashley be now, so I think that they should split everything down the middle! Besides with your FIL as your manager that really is only interested in furthering his own daughters career you aren't going to be gettiny any great breaks to make more money anyway. Nick put up with Papa Joe and that alone I think he deserves money!
 
#14
coco-nut said:
I don't really see them for young people, unless one of them has enormous assets or a stake in a family business. If one just has a liklihood of success, that's not a good enough reason.

But for older people who have accumulated a lot or have children from a previous marriage, I think they are essential. Children's college funds and legacies need to be protected, as do the retirement funds of people who don't have many more working years left.
Click to expand...

I agree with this.
 
#15
I think pre-nups can be good and can be used in a good way. It certainly does deter the gold digging aspect to a certain degree. And also, what if a woman becomes a stay at home mom and her husband leaves ? She's given up years on the job market, promotions, experience and the such in order to invest in a joint project (kids) yet could get left out in the cold. It would certainly ensure that even if the husband is a jerk and skips out on child support, she at least has some money in order to keep herself with while she changes her lifestyle. Vice versa for stay at home dads.
 
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