hey gals, as some of you know, the last few months have been tough for me and now i have another thing to deal with. My BF and I have been together for 3.5 years and i told him he either needed to propose or break up. and the BF just broke up with me. I have this whole bunch of feelings but i couldn't even say a thing on the phone. i didn't know what to say. He always said he was serious and he was in this relationship to get married and that's why i stuck around in the relationship for so long and never pushed him about getting engaged till now. and looking back, i should have done it earlier and i should have seen the red flags. i feel i wasted 4 precious years during my prime dating years and he wasted my time stinging me along. when i first dated him, i knew he had 2 long term (4-5 yrs) relationships prior and it didn't because he couldn't get married. I don't know why i never saw it as a red flag back then that he was commitment phobic. i just accepted his explaination that they were not right for him. why didn't i see that and run straight away?? he said he couldn't get engaged because i) we're apart now (We apart now because i'm sorting out family issues but i've said it won't be longer than another 6 more months.) ii) I'm not sure i want kids and if i had kids, when i could have them given career plans. the irony is that he doesn't even know if he wants kids but it's an issue. there are so many things i want to yell at him for - mostly for wasting my time. but somehow i guess i'm not a yeller so it doesn't come out. should i make an effort to yell at him? i'm so hurt and angry. i want to tell him how he's commitment phobic and to stop wasting everyone else's time by stringing them along for 4-5 years. perhaps i would have met a great guy in the last 4 years if i had cut this relationship off sooner and going into the big 3 0, i wonder if i'll meet anyone after this. 99% of the guys i know would rather date someone in their 20s/younger than them instead of someone their age. and i don't blame them for wanting to do that. breaking up and ending long relationships suck.