To Say Something or Not to Say Something

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  1. My bf and I were just bickering over this, so I thought I'd ask you ladies for your opinion. I have a very close friend who I've known for 10+ years. Sweetest woman ever, I adore her. The thing is-she has a moustache. I'm so used to it, I don't notice it anymore, but my bf always refers to her as 'the chick with a moustache.' so clearly other people notice it.

    He says that if I were a true friend, I'd (politely) say something to her about it, or get her a gift certificate to a salon that does waxing. He feels it's something that's easy to fix, and would drastically improve her appearance. My opinion on it is- she has a boyfriend, if he doesn't care, why should I?

    So which one of us is right? Is there any polite way of bringing something like facial hair or body odor (not her, but I had a friend in college who I guess didn't wear deodorant all the time) up to a friend without completely destroying a friendship?
  2. I would take her to a spa as a treat and tell her I'm going to go get my facial hair waxed and ask if she ever thought of trying it.
  3. I think the fact that she is an adult herself, she knows its there but must not bother her. Why say something that could hurt her feelings if she is already o.k. with it. Im sure if you have been friends for 10 years, she would have already confided in you if it truely bothered her. I say just leave it alone unless she mentions it to you.
  4. I would say something because she may not know. She may be embarrassed about it. You never know, but as a friend you can at least ask. Friends talk about everything, why not talk about facial hair? If I had B.O. I would hope my friends would tell me and not some stranger on the street or let me walk around stinky.
  5. If she is a good friend of yours you should be able to talk to her about anything. I'd mention it to her.
  6. Maybe she's fine with it? Maybe her boyfriend likes it? I don't know. Unless she is totally clueless, I don't think I could say anything. If it doesn't bother them, it wouldn't bother me.
  7. Maybe she feels she is making a statement by it. Ok, probably not but I'll say one thing, for women, FACIAL HAIR is a very TOUCHY subject. Although facial hair should not be a problem any more with all the new lasers that are out. Maybe you can mention laser hair treatment (as if you were thinking of having arms done or something) see what she says? If not, leave it alone. Im sure she knows about the stash.
  8. I think if she's a grown woman who holds down a job and pays the rent and knows what she's doing with her life, and she doesn't like having a moustache, then she would've done something about it. Some people just really don't care about stuff like that, and I think that's completely ok. If it were me, I'd be annoyed if some dude (who's not a beauty expert) wanted to give me beauty pointers to make me more "attractive." I'd feel judged, frankly.

    If I really felt the need to talk about it, then I'd bring it up in a general way that's not specific to her moustache and let the conversation get there eventually.
  9. I would tell her if she was close to me and knew that my intentions are always for her good.
  10. I agree with the others who say...Don't say anything. I think if your friend wanted your opinion, she would ask for it. Afterall this is a bit more than just telling a friend she has food in her teeth.

    People today more and more feel so free to give thier opinions, especially when not asked. Some things are better left unsaid. We can still have our thoughts and opinions but keep them to ourselves.
  11. wow this thread is still going? leave your poor hairy freind alone.

    sorry. drinking. why don't you all come to the club tonight?
  12. I knew a coworker who let her 'stache stay for years, and then suddenly she got rid of it w/electrolysis treatments. She never said a word about it until after it was gone...I'm not sure how the subject came up but I think she brought it up. So, you may get a similar pleasant surprise one day. ;)

  13. That's how I feel. My bf was just making me feel like a bad friend for not saying anything. I'm leaving things as is. He's a guy-what does he know!?

    Thanks all!