So I finally talked to my boss ...

  1. Let me start from the beginning ... As some of you know, I'm having some serious issues with work. They've doubled my workload while refusing to give me a raise or a promotion (this is the SECOND time they pulled this crap on me) and there had been serious politics and backstabbing going on (I just mind my own business but apparently that only attracted more problems). I also recently injured my shoulder because of the extra responsibility that I took on (I'm a financial analyst, I'm NOT supposed to be carrying 50 lb boxes).

    With the finance industry not doing well, all the important people at my company were in a crappy mood everyday. Everyone was under the gun so some slackers finally started to feel the pressure of having to actually WORK for a change. Of course, these people complained and WHINED about how much work they have. Earlier this week, one of the big bosses told me that I would be assigned a new project because his secretary was "too swamped" to do it. WTH? So now I'm a secretary too? I don't mind the extra work except this is one of those projects that will take away lots of time because I have to hound people to get things to be by deadlines - and I KNOW ppl won't do it because I'm on their backburners. When things don't get done, it'd be my fault even though it was those other ppl who hadn't responded.

    In addition, one of the temps was leaving and my boss called me into his office. The temp's boss (who also reports to my boss) was also there. They told me that I would be taking over this temp's work. At this point, I had enough and I spoke up. I said I was concerned that I would be swamped and that I would fall behind. I also told them that while I like to take on challenges, I do not want things to fall through the cracks. Furthermore, I told them that I felt that we need to establish a process and standard procedures because the lack of process and organization was what was causing a lot of these issues in the department.

    Guess what my boss said?

    He said he couldn't imagine WHY I have that much to do. He said he didn't think I have much to do and that I just need to prioritize. WHAT.THE.F*CK?!!!! I was already falling behind AND i've started to make mistakes in MY work because I had to do stuff for everybody else. And here I was being told I don't have enough to do? Bloody hell!! I told my boss (in a polite and respectful way of course) that just because I actually get things done and am efficient doesn't mean that I have nothing to do!!!!! I'm so damn pissed!!!!

    I'm only holding onto this job because I do need to get paid. Also, if I quit my job then I don't have the health insurance, not to mention it will not look good on my resume. But f*ck!!! This makes me so pissed! You know, TWO years ago I used to LIKE coming to work! Now I am irritable and pissy whenever I started driving to work. Of course, I can't relax on the weekends either because I have my family to deal with. I'm surprised that I'm still standing ... I must have an inhuman tolerance to stress ... *sigh*.

    My company doesn't appreciate what I do. I am under-utilized and underpaid and I postponed my vacation for TWO months (and because of that, I MISSED my 4th Year Anniversary with my SO) because they needed my help at work. Did they appreciate what I do? Hell no! Gah!!! I can't really tell my family about it because they've been PUSHING me to get a job close to home for ages now and I absolutely refuse to, plus they're already displeased with the fact that I'm underpaid. I also cannot tell my SO because this would only give him more ammunition in telling me to DROP EVERYTHING and move to SG with him. Oh, that brought up something else ...

    My SO kind of gave me an ultimatum earlier last week. He was going through some changes at work and he needed me to be there for him. I told him I couldn't move without getting a DECENT job first (by decent, I mean equivalent to what I'm being paid here, since the benefits there are not as comprehensive as the U.S.). He just didn't get it. He felt I could get a job here LATER and that if I couldn't find something for ONE YEAR, then I can go back to the U.S.. I told him doing so will NOT be beneficial, not to mention I get paid MORE than him. Even I won't be able to forgive myself for doing something so STUPID ...

    So, I'm doubling my effort for a job hunt in SG with decent pay but am still not having much luck. I'm feeling pressure from every single direction. I really do feel stretched very thin and very overwhelmed. Anyways, I just want to rant a little bit since it is Friday night and I'm stressed out as hell.
  2. awww Kou!! Hang in there!! Feel free to call me anytime even if it is just to vent!!
  3. What or where is S.G.?

    Do you think your relationship is the one? Someone is going to have to move sooner or later. Looks like this might be a good time for you.

    Have you been documenting your increased responsibilities, along with a calendar with the time it takes to do each task? I would present that to your boss.

    My recent experience is once a job place starts abusing you, it is downhill. I was working for some jokers that were mismanaging money. Every few weeks they had some new pay scheme that would be a "win-win". I made great money (in the beginning , but I was one of the lesser expenses in the company. The job was intense, and physically gruelling. It required the body strength of a 25 year old and the experience of a fifty year old. It never was win-win. I had to fight and nearly beg to get my check. They made us (field people) look like the problem. They are now piling the work on their 2 salaried employees. I and other contract folks have quit.
  4. S.G. = Singapore :smile:
  5. Since your SO wants you to make all of these changes, does he want a marriage?

    Don't do anything under too much pressure, You need his support, too.
  6. ((hugs)) I'm so sorry your job is stressing you out like this. How can the boss be so blind?! I don't have any advice, just support.
  7. One of the things I learned about my position is that they never acknowledge the work that gets done -- only the things that DONT get done. If I were you, I suggest that you ask for a weekly or bi-weekly meeting with your supervisor(s) to "organize" your task list. Have THEM make the priorities on your time ....once they have made those decisions, then I would email them a copy of the list so everyone is on task.

    Each time a new project comes into your queue, I would ask them where it falls in the list they assisted you in creating. That way, everyone has a running tally of what's on your plate and how you need to allocate your time.

    Additionally this system comes in REALLY handy when its promotion/salary increase time because you now have a running tally of your accomplishments on paper that they can't deny.

    Finally, for your BF -- I was in the same position with my BF because he was moving for his residency and I didn't have a job. We sat down and planned out a schedule 3 months I would out to be with him. In six months I need to have a job(s) that pay X amount or he needs to supplement my income. When he heard the word supplement, his attitude changed and he became quite respectful of my efforts to find a new job to be with him.

    If you want to chat more about this, feel free to private message cause I understand exactly where you are coming from!
  8. HUGS, that sux that your boss didn't hear a word you said
  9. I totally know where you're coming from and you really have my sympathy!
    I worked in a terrible abbusive job situation for more than 3 1/2 years and there the problem was my boss. He screamed at me, called me names and he even got physical last summer where he choked me (it was a joke for him). HR and the GM knew about it and they knew that I was the one leading the department and they didn't do anything about it. They offered to fire him if I will testify against him in court and if I take over his job. So I resigned because I didn't want to be terrorized by this lunatic anymore and take another one for the team. This was actually the best move for me to make. I quit a month ago and I'm still recovering from those years but finally I can sleep again, I don't burst into tears anymore without a reason and my family life (son and dh) really improved! I don't have another job right now and I'm not looking as under German law I'll get 70% of my net salary for the next 12 months so that gives me time to figure out what I want.
    I really hpe that you find a new job soon as this one is going to eat you alive. No job is worth risking your health and happyness.
    My little reveange is that once I quit 2 other collegues followed because they didn't want to work under my boss without me as their protection was gone. My director has begged me a couple of times to come back since but there isn't enough money they can pay me to go back into that hell.
    Good luck!!
    You can pm me anytime!
  10. I am not sure what the law is in your country, but here, if its not listed in your contract and responsibilites, may change in writing but with your and your bosses approval, then its called supplemental or supplanting (sp?). Basically it can turn into a big legal issue. This is harming your performance in both your profession and personal life. My suggestion is to contact Human Resources, a lawyer, or another offical and talk to them about your situation and the burden of these changes and pressure on you. Work loads should be distributed evenly. You dont even have enough time to finish your own load so why are they forcing more onto you? Dont just sit quitely and let them walk all over you.

    As for the SO....yes you make more than him now, but what happens if you get fired because you have fallen behind from all the extra work that has been placed on you? Make a frugrally for a while or live working in a place you dont like. You may even find a GREAT job when you move. Look at all your options.

    Best of luck. Hope things get better.
  11. Once again, thank you ladies for your support and advice! I know I can always count on you guys!!!:love:

    I plan on putting everything in writing from now on. I used to just walk into my boss' office and ask him questions because his office is right next to my cubicle (so is his boss's office). However, I'm just going to email him from now on. I was hesitant about doing so at first because i was concerned that I may make a mistake and it will be in writing. But now, I'm really beyond caring.

    I spoke with my SO about this yesterday and he said the reason they're doing this to me was that I have always been too efficient and now they have "expectation". So when I finally spoke up, it was already too late because they now thought I was under-performing. Furthermore, he said that I should've used this situation to my advantage because it was apparent that the company NEEDS me. I'm the only person (besides my boss) who could do his job. So if I'm gone, my boss will be majorly swamped.

    My SO felt that since the finance sector is not doing well right now, there's no way my company will hire another person. He said if I wait til the industry is better to demand things from my bosses, it'd be too late. The thing is, I had asked for a raise or promotion but I have gotten a flat no. They even told me that the soonest this could be a possibility (not a guarantee) would be next March (2008). When I told my SO this, he said I should give them an ultimatum and tell them that it's either a raise or that I quit.

    Problem is, if I quit, then I don't even get Unemployment Insurance (I'm located in Southern California). My SO felt that if this is causing me to under-perform, then I may get fired at some point anyway ... I don't think they'll fire me. They NEED me, the problem is I'm not getting compensated for it (except for OT, but still not enough). I need the money right now, I have responsibility to attend to, this is why I can't leave for quite a while ...

    It's crucial for me to find another job, however ... Because the longer I stay, the worse it'll get ... Surely my bosses realize that there must be something wrong with me if I continue to stay in spite of the abuse, but the problem is I'm not finding any decent job right now. I don't know what the problem is, someone with my skills should be making pretty good money right now; I just wish I have good connections, which I don't.

    All I know is that I'm hitting my 3rd year this August, and I must be real loser should I still not be able to find a decent job by that time ...
  12. Hey kou, soz to hear that things still aren't looking up for you. Feel free to vent here, and PM if you ever need support. :flowers:
  13. kou - i'm so sorry to hear all this! this frustrates me because i was in the same situation. some companies do NOT appreciate their employees and take total advantage of their workers. argfg!!!#$^&* i'm getting mad all over again thinking about it!!

    the only thing that i can say to you is.. you need to hurry up and find another job. people DO NOT CHANGE. you have to remember that all employees are expendible (yeah i know, it SUCKs) but it's the truth.

    find yourself a better workplace cuz obviously this one SUCKS!!!!
  14. ^
    I agree. Many (if not most) employers nowadays don't care about making employees feel valued or appreciated. If these people are treating you poorly, you can't change that behavior. Best to move on to something else. The energy you are expending by feeling angry and victimized could be more well used to look for another job. Take that energy and empower yourself. Don't let other people, including your family or SO call the shots in your life.

    Also, I keep reading from you that you feel you won't be able to find another job... you need to stop that line of thinking because it's hurting you. Hire a headhunter and start going on interviews. The longer you stay in this job, the worse it will be for you. Do you know why? Because your self image and morale will be so low that by the time you find another one, you won't be able to perform. Jobs like this are a cancer and they eat you from the inside out. Most of the time you don't realize how bad it is until you walk away and when you feel the relief of that, you realize how bad it truly was.
  15. If I was in your working conditions, I'd be out already. See if they can go without me. If they don't come to me to make an offer, that's fine. I can find another job. But that's just me. I know what I'm worth and how much load I can take. If I can't take it and they won't compromise, I leave. I won't jeopardize my happiness and well-being over that.

    I hope things will turn out fine the next few days. (((hugs)))