so I am a bit sad really - and no other place to share it

  1. my son is going to be 1 year in a few days so that is :yahoo: and I have been preparing the b-day like crazy. I will only be making cup cakes - but assorted flavours etc. I will post a pic when I have them all ready because believe me I hate baking and it is quite an achievement.... :roflmfao:

    on to the sad part - I posted a few times that hubby and I are on different continents, and first we thought he could make it but now he cant.... :sad: :crybaby:. now I really don't want anyone at home to notice that I am rather sad because I can't stand this kind of stuff - I am a tough girl... :roflmfao: (well not really). and I shared once which led a whole bunch of un-invited comments from some people in the 'family' who have dedicated their life to nothing other than believing their way is the only way.

    anyway, I also have my defence at the end of the month so I am up to my ears preparing and charged like an electric fence, so can't afford being down. and in the end we made the decision togetehr but the reason I am here is because I have to finish my studies - so can't really cry to him, he already missed his son's 1st year. and trust me, people are judgmental enough as it is, so I don't want to add by sharing my sadness..

    but honestly, i miss him :crybaby:.
  2. I'm sorry, Lara, that is strong, girl, your little boy will appreciate it. It may be hard now, but there's an end in sight, right? And there's nothing wrong with expressing loneliness over this. It's only natural. Big hug, and I hope you and your baby have a great day. Happy birthday to him!
  3. Awww I'm sorry, and who cares what some of the people are saying. You are doing what you feel is right for you and as long as you and your DH have agreed then it is nobody elses business. I understand though about some family members stating opinions that aren't really wanted. But I hope you see your DH soon, and your son has a wonderful birthday!!!
  4. Hey Lara,


    i can only imagine how tough it must be to be separated by continents and studying and caring for your son at the same time!! It takes alot!! honestly i can't imagine baking cupcakes, planning goody bags and preparing to defend a dissertation all at the same time!!:wtf: That's alot to do! on your own as well!! OF COURSE you're stressed!!

    I'm sure you miss your DH but you're almost done with your phd and you'll be reunited soon =) and you guys will have many more parties together!! Call DH or email/write him a note and tell him you miss him.

    easier said than done but Forget about the people who criticize you. you are your DH were ok with this decision and your decision to go back to school and your son is well cared for so that's all that really matters.

    it is always more difficult to go against the grain so realize that it's a great and brave decision to go back and study with a kid and a DH far away! it's a struggle but it'll be so rewarding and you should be very proud of yourself.

    I have lots of family who also do the same in being judgmental (i am always in the wrong), are hypocritical, and like to impose their views on others. so i know how you feel. best to stay arms length and like you are doing, not confide in them wchich gives them more room to tell you how to lead your life.

    we're here for you... you can talk to us =)
  5. *hugs hugs hugs*
    Hang on there...
  6. Big hugs. You know it'll be over soon, and you'll be back together!
  7. *hugs*

    just keep thinking - you're defending!! and when that's over, you'll be ready to move on and have everybody be together again!

    and there will always, always be people who want to criticize you and your life. just remember that they're not the ones living in your shoes, so they can't properly judge.
  8. I'm sorry to hear that....

    *hugs* keep your head up..especially for your son. Kids can tell stuff is up.
  9. U have every right to be sad and to be missing him..DOnt let anyone tell u otherwise girl!
    Chin up..we are all here to chat with anytime......Hopefully u will see him soon and feel free to vent with us anytime!HUGS!
  10. *BIG HUG* Stay strong, everything will be alright and when you see how happy your little one is on his birthday you will know all your work was worth it!
  11. Sorry to hear you're feeling a lil down.

    I think you're doing a fab job, baking all those cupcakes for your lil boy's birthday.

    Stay strong and upbeat. You'll be with your DH in no time at all. And until then, you have us! :flowers:
  12. You can do it!! It will all be worth it when you finish!!
  13. You'll get through it. It's only temporary, right?

    I can't even have children of my own, and that's permanent.

    Be joyous in what you do have. Happiness and health, and you'll be reunited eventually.

    To hell with what others think.
  14. I'm so sorry lara. I know how hard it can be to be away from your SO. You know what, hun? Forget what your family thinks! I too come from a very traditional family, and I love them soooo much, but jeez, they do not take kindly to changes sometimes....anyway I guess what I'm trying to say is it is only natural that you feel sad about your DH not being able to be w/ you. You don't need to put up a tough front, it only ends up hurting YOU. If your family begins to get judgemental again, just tell them politely, "thank you for your concern, but I really just need you to be there for me. It is what it is and I am happy, so lets move past everything else, and just be there for me because I'm a little sad right now." They should be there for you, you don't need someone also throwing in mean comments while your already dealing w/ so much more. Just talk to them about it.
  15. ^ you know, this is exactly what I tell myself all the time - so usually I am not down about anything because I think that I am lucky to have what I have etc, and mustnt be ungrateful. and I am not, it was just a bit of a set back yesterday!

    anyway, I hope you can find other ways for a child in your life if you wish for that :heart: