sell the birkin or get a loan ? relationship breakdown!

ChloeSS

ChloeSS

O.G.
Feb 4, 2006
2,219
198
#1
As some of you remember that my bf was so kindy offer some help on my birkin purchase. He was happy to lend me some money to purchase my birkin without any interest and as long as I pay it off in a reasonable timeframe.

Sadly, I found out he cheated on me. and it was something happened 1-2 years ago and they was hanging out for around more than 1 year. Maybe up today, they still in connection.. who knows?

I already noticed he has been acted very abnormal on the last 1-2 years, always fly to overseas, not much phone call after he left the country, consistantly seen his jewellery on that "WOMAN"'s hand or finger. He keep deny that nothing happened and they are just good friend.

Up to a point that I cant convince myself to trust him anymore and I feel the whole relationship gets so ugly.

Ok, sorry about the long story, the question is... I dont want to own him anymore and I just want to quit and pay him all back in once. Should I get a loan? because I work in the bank, I could get a loan in a very special rate and based on my income and outgoing, I could pay it off within 2 years ( if I dont make any purchase) or even eariler (if i get any pay raise).

or Should I sell the birkin? but... that is something I really dont want to do so since they could last me for my lifetime.

pls help ...
 
#2
ChloeSS, I am so sorry you are going through this! Big hugs!!! I can totally understand why you just want to pay him back and be done with it! I really would hate for you to take out a loan to finance the birkin- with interest added in, it is so costly. Do you own any other bags that you can sell to raise the funds so you don't have to sell your birkin???
 
#3
I do own the following bags:
Chanel reissue 2.55
YSL Muse
Rouge VIF balenciaga City bag
Black Twiggy
LV Le Fab
and with lots of LV accessiorse.

I am thinking to sell all the Accessories first... but compare to the amount I am owning for the birkin those seems cant help much.. :sad: sadly.
 
#4
Oh Chloe, I'm so sorry this happened to you! Definitely better though you found out now than if this happened later on when you were married. You deserve so much better. My knee-jerk reaction says to forget it, and that jerk should pay for the bag for cheating on you. But the angel on my shoulder knows that you should; if I didn't sell the bag, I'd slowly pay him back on my own if he's not pressing you for the money. If it's a stretch to you financially I wouldn't do the loan.
 
#5
You could easily sell those to raise the funds! Especially the Chanel, the Muse, the B-bag and the LV LeFab- these are all really hot bags and hopefully, you can raise enough so you can pay off your bf without taking out a loan!
 
#6
If you really can't bear to part with it, you could get a loan from the bank where you currently work and keep the Birkin. If it were me I don't think I could keep the bag, I don't suffer fools very well. There will always be another Birkin...perhaps one not so laden with bad memories.
 
#7
ai.. it is not a easy decision. I've been dealing with him and that woman for nearly 2 years... my emotion just keep up and down esp when he dont feel like being honest with me and tell me what's been happened. he just said.. " forget about the past and look at the future" and then I will always found out more and more evidence from other source. They even gone on holiday together while I was in a therapy for depression due to them!! That gal uploaded all the photo online and hope I can see it. YESSS!! I saw them all and I gone so mad!!

anyway.. about the bags.. sometimes I think he dont deserve the money since he is been cheating on me for such a long time with no guilty!! on the otherside, he pretends to be a nice guy , always buy me handbag but the fact is.. he asked me to pay for it slowly but all his friend believes the other way which he paid for all my birkin!

I think he would be ok if i pay it back slowly.. but hard to say cos.. sometimes when a couple breaking up. it can get into very ugly stages which he might want everything back.

What's been happened is.. My mother just passed away 2 months ago. I was so upset and I told him to stay with me for a while and he told me he has to go on trip to do business but I believe if you are really doing something serious you could get it done in a few days unless you want to have another holiday and have fun ! I told him if you leave me this time I will break up with you.

and he chose to go on holiday /business trip and he hope when he came back I will be as nice as nothing happened. But this time I wont! because my life has been changed since my mother died. I need some help seriously! and he wasnt on my side.
 
#8
DO NOT PAY HIM BACK!! TEll him you suffered enough and if you ahd been married, him cheating on you would have cost him $$$$ with the attorneys. Seriously- he screwed things up, why should you have to not only go through a break up but also now suffer financially because he couldn't keep it in his pants??
sorry if im not being helpful and its so good of you to want to make things square with him but he doesnt deserve it...
 
#9
ChloeSS said:
ai.. it is not a easy decision. I've been dealing with him and that woman for nearly 2 years... my emotion just keep up and down esp when he dont feel like being honest with me and tell me what's been happened. he just said.. " forget about the past and look at the future" and then I will always found out more and more evidence from other source. They even gone on holiday together while I was in a therapy for depression due to them!! That gal uploaded all the photo online and hope I can see it. YESSS!! I saw them all and I gone so mad!!

anyway.. about the bags.. sometimes I think he dont deserve the money since he is been cheating on me for such a long time with no guilty!! on the otherside, he pretends to be a nice guy , always buy me handbag but the fact is.. he asked me to pay for it slowly but all his friend believes the other way which he paid for all my birkin!

I think he would be ok if i pay it back slowly.. but hard to say cos.. sometimes when a couple breaking up. it can get into very ugly stages which he might want everything back.

What's been happened is.. My mother just passed away 2 months ago. I was so upset and I told him to stay with me for a while and he told me he has to go on trip to do business but I believe if you are really doing something serious you could get it done in a few days unless you want to have another holiday and have fun ! I told him if you leave me this time I will break up with you.

and he chose to go on holiday /business trip and he hope when he came back I will be as nice as nothing happened. But this time I wont! because my life has been changed since my mother died. I need some help seriously! and he wasnt on my side.
Click to expand...


OMG!! First of all, i'm so sorry about your mother....

He really does not deserve a thought of your time and effort.
 
#10
I am so sorry for your loss ChloeSS. The Birkin aside...it sounds to me that the thing you should focus on is your emotional health and your feelings of integrity. It seems like something important that you should discuss with your therapist.
 
#11
I feel for you, this has been a bad year for you, now another turn-speaking from experience, when you get beyond this sadness and in a new place I wonder if you will still want the bag that seems to be the focus of a lot of feelings-and also, paying (him) off little by little means continuous involvement, something you might not want to do-there will always be other bags, my 2 cents is to free yourself up to make any moves you might have to make-and I hope this cloud passes soon-good luck-
 
#12
ChloeSS I am so sorry to hear about your mother! I have been there, and know that you must be going through such emotional turmoil! You do not need to make any decisions right now about the birkin or your other bags- I am sure your boyfriend can handle waiting a few more months for you to decide what you want to do. Just don't rush into any decisions right now- take some time to grieve and to deal with your relationship. Everything will fall into place in time.

My heart goes out to you! Please know that we are all here for you!
 
#13
Chloe my best wishes to you. I'm so sad to hear about your situation and the loss of your mother.

I think you shoudl consider selling on of the bags you listed above on ebay, and pay him back that way. Don't take out a loan....too much interest.
 
#14
So sorry to hear about your mother and that your BF is awful.
I think that Croissant has a good point. You have given years of your time and attention to him. He does not deserve any money or any of your further time and effort.
However, if you really want to pay him back and still love and want to keep your birkin what about
1) selling most of your other bags and then taking a small loan, or
2) give him only that which you can make from the sale of your other bags and have him call the debt quits.
 
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