The stress of school is really starting to get to me. I've worked so, so hard to be a good student and keep all of my marks in the 80-100 range, which is saying a lot, because I spent the first half of the term feeling overwhelmed and stupid because I didn't understand what was going on. I've sacrificed a lot to get those marks -- I don't have any semblance of a social life, and I'd work no matter how sick or exhausted I felt. I'm working hard not only because I want a good mark, but because I really want to tutor for this course next year: there's an excellent program run and paid for by the school that offers group tutoring for certain courses, and they've wanted to do one for this class for years (I think it would really benefit them), but they've never had anyone qualified enough/interested. Now, come my first exam, I find all those things that I didn't understand in the first portion of the term coming back to bite me in the ass. I'm really upset. If I don't do well on this exam, all of my hard work will go unrecognized, and I won't get to do that tutoring gig that I was looking forwards to. I'm depressed that I'm on thin ice right now despite all the work that I've put into the course. Meanwhile, I'm finally starting to burn out: I want so, so badly to go to bed (I feel like I could sleep until tomorrow evening, if left to my own devices), or at least curl up under the covers and eat enough chocolate to grow an extra pair of thighs. I'm so stressed that I feel nauseous, and even if I manage to calm down, the stress returns. To bring the violins to a crescendo, I cried myself to sleep last night. I don't know how to handle these feelings or my upcoming exam. I went to the professor for help, and he wasn't that helpful/couldn't help me that much because of all the other students coming to him with questions. I really enjoy my professor's lectures, and I want him to notice me and know how cool I found his lectures, but without a good mark, I feel like I'll just be another annoying student devoid of social skills.