hi All,
the last 2 days have been an emotional rollercoaster to me. I need to vent and ask for your opinions.
I have been in my current job for a little over 1 yr now. its a small team of 4, and there is a senior in the team. I hate him and I just cant get along with him. He is very lazy, condecending, a back stabber, a total lick ass to the boss and keep alot of important information to himself. he is an asian born here. He hated me because I am asian born overseas (so i dont have perfect english), and that i worked a yr in admin (he refered to me as ppl from admin!), & that I was quiet ( he said I was a pushover). abit of background on me (not to boast, but to show u how unfair he define me as ppl from admin) - i had double degrees from excellent Aus uni, had scholarship and won academic awards but I am no nerd. anyway in july (just a few days away from 1 yr) i asked my boss if i could apply for another job internally. He was upset cos I was his succession plan (when my senior go) but let me apply, only if i told my senior abt it. Well, it didnt go well, I didnt get the internal job. My boss welcomed me to stay and said he will see that things change with my senior, and i got to be patient. Since then I have been having catch up sessions with this senior to talk out our misscommunications problems. My boss just didnt do very much about it, its very disappointing for him, its all just words, and I lost my loyalty. Its working things out a little better, but there are times where i just feel he is just his condecending self. for example, he brought up the fact i didnt get the internal job i applied for, and he said .. i cant go applyng for other jobs in the future (doing diff things) .. cos he will think i just want an escape and he said i promise to be committed after not getting the internal job. I hate it he made me feel like i am stuck. I told hi, but couldnt get ovet this.
anyway time has passed since then, things get a little better, but i still cant work with my senior, and my boss is just keeping an eye close.
i went looking for an external jobs, there were tons and tons of interview, very encouraging for me. and my boss suspects that i was looking, asked me if i were, i got scared and lie. then, it turns out one of my interview went so well, and it was my dream job & company, so I accepted it. I had to wait until i sign my contract and told him (right? to cover myself.. I dont want to get booted and then didnt get things finalise)... so
i handed in my resignation, boss wasnt happy, he said he feel betrayed! that I lied to him abt not looking, plus i didnt stay for 2 yrs as he has wanted me too, and he wont reference for me. I apologised abt the lieng thing (is it such a big deal, how many ppl would own up?!) but i was so shocked! i have been a very good worker, great quality work ( he admitted this too, so did my senior). i felt he was just using the petty - u didnt stay for 2 yrs, I am not obligated to give you reference. he tried counter offer, I just feel he is so selfish, my new job is definitely more challengin and its a great career advancement for me, there is no way he can counter offer his way for me to stay. we are talking abt 25% increase here. If he could have afford counter offer, he could have afford to pay me more then. I have always stayed back at work, he neveer paid me over time, taxi to get home or evening meal time. Was also such a cheapo on my performance review, saying I was just doing my job!
my senior sat down with me (1 on 1), i thought it was going to be a thanks for everything, good bye, good luck, hand shake thing. no it wasnt, here was a few things he said
- I got the new job, probably cos someone rejected its offer, and I got it.
- I burn my bridges with current boss, work mates, basically everyone in my big team, cos I lied when asked and didnt stay for 2 years. he is trying to say my career is doom, cos in finance industry, ppl know ppl and ppl move around to other companies, they will hear rumours abtme,. I was shocked!.. wat the hell did i do wrong to deserve this?! so i told him, well if boss thinks that the facti was truthful has undo all my hardwork for 1 yr, then let it be. I have apologised like a million times.
- he called me ppl from admin again, he said only know processing, dont know how to think outside the box (he was from call centre goodness!!) and if I have lied in my interview, abt not having the experience in trading shares.
i didnt said anything bad to him, i grabbed my boss after wards and told him the insults i got, then we called my senior into the room, and he apologized. my boss said he has to notify my head of department, so he said I should mention this too during my catch up. so .. I did, the head was very shock and had a stern word with my senior. He tried to make me stay and even offered to be my reference (for my career advancement in the same company but not outside), I refused, cos I said its tempting but I couldnt stay longer in the same team as my senior. he wanted me to stay 6 months, wait for mys enior to move on, be a senior for 6 months may be, then move on.
now, my boss seems to hate me, cos i think the head also had a stern word with him. my boss asked if i want to leave earlier than my 2 weeks notice, i said ok. the head didnt agree, i dont know why. now things are awkward, and I am hating it. what are ur thoughts? i am very sad and disturbed.
- although the boss has agreed to be my ref, i shouldnt list him, wat do u think?
- when my handover is complete in a few days, should i ask to go earlier?
- should i apologize to my boss again? or just leave it? i dont want to have more uncomfortable conversations, but then if i dont talk to him now, wont ever again may be.
the last 2 days have been an emotional rollercoaster to me. I need to vent and ask for your opinions.
I have been in my current job for a little over 1 yr now. its a small team of 4, and there is a senior in the team. I hate him and I just cant get along with him. He is very lazy, condecending, a back stabber, a total lick ass to the boss and keep alot of important information to himself. he is an asian born here. He hated me because I am asian born overseas (so i dont have perfect english), and that i worked a yr in admin (he refered to me as ppl from admin!), & that I was quiet ( he said I was a pushover). abit of background on me (not to boast, but to show u how unfair he define me as ppl from admin) - i had double degrees from excellent Aus uni, had scholarship and won academic awards but I am no nerd. anyway in july (just a few days away from 1 yr) i asked my boss if i could apply for another job internally. He was upset cos I was his succession plan (when my senior go) but let me apply, only if i told my senior abt it. Well, it didnt go well, I didnt get the internal job. My boss welcomed me to stay and said he will see that things change with my senior, and i got to be patient. Since then I have been having catch up sessions with this senior to talk out our misscommunications problems. My boss just didnt do very much about it, its very disappointing for him, its all just words, and I lost my loyalty. Its working things out a little better, but there are times where i just feel he is just his condecending self. for example, he brought up the fact i didnt get the internal job i applied for, and he said .. i cant go applyng for other jobs in the future (doing diff things) .. cos he will think i just want an escape and he said i promise to be committed after not getting the internal job. I hate it he made me feel like i am stuck. I told hi, but couldnt get ovet this.
anyway time has passed since then, things get a little better, but i still cant work with my senior, and my boss is just keeping an eye close.
i went looking for an external jobs, there were tons and tons of interview, very encouraging for me. and my boss suspects that i was looking, asked me if i were, i got scared and lie. then, it turns out one of my interview went so well, and it was my dream job & company, so I accepted it. I had to wait until i sign my contract and told him (right? to cover myself.. I dont want to get booted and then didnt get things finalise)... so
i handed in my resignation, boss wasnt happy, he said he feel betrayed! that I lied to him abt not looking, plus i didnt stay for 2 yrs as he has wanted me too, and he wont reference for me. I apologised abt the lieng thing (is it such a big deal, how many ppl would own up?!) but i was so shocked! i have been a very good worker, great quality work ( he admitted this too, so did my senior). i felt he was just using the petty - u didnt stay for 2 yrs, I am not obligated to give you reference. he tried counter offer, I just feel he is so selfish, my new job is definitely more challengin and its a great career advancement for me, there is no way he can counter offer his way for me to stay. we are talking abt 25% increase here. If he could have afford counter offer, he could have afford to pay me more then. I have always stayed back at work, he neveer paid me over time, taxi to get home or evening meal time. Was also such a cheapo on my performance review, saying I was just doing my job!
my senior sat down with me (1 on 1), i thought it was going to be a thanks for everything, good bye, good luck, hand shake thing. no it wasnt, here was a few things he said
- I got the new job, probably cos someone rejected its offer, and I got it.
- I burn my bridges with current boss, work mates, basically everyone in my big team, cos I lied when asked and didnt stay for 2 years. he is trying to say my career is doom, cos in finance industry, ppl know ppl and ppl move around to other companies, they will hear rumours abtme,. I was shocked!.. wat the hell did i do wrong to deserve this?! so i told him, well if boss thinks that the facti was truthful has undo all my hardwork for 1 yr, then let it be. I have apologised like a million times.
- he called me ppl from admin again, he said only know processing, dont know how to think outside the box (he was from call centre goodness!!) and if I have lied in my interview, abt not having the experience in trading shares.
i didnt said anything bad to him, i grabbed my boss after wards and told him the insults i got, then we called my senior into the room, and he apologized. my boss said he has to notify my head of department, so he said I should mention this too during my catch up. so .. I did, the head was very shock and had a stern word with my senior. He tried to make me stay and even offered to be my reference (for my career advancement in the same company but not outside), I refused, cos I said its tempting but I couldnt stay longer in the same team as my senior. he wanted me to stay 6 months, wait for mys enior to move on, be a senior for 6 months may be, then move on.
now, my boss seems to hate me, cos i think the head also had a stern word with him. my boss asked if i want to leave earlier than my 2 weeks notice, i said ok. the head didnt agree, i dont know why. now things are awkward, and I am hating it. what are ur thoughts? i am very sad and disturbed.
- although the boss has agreed to be my ref, i shouldnt list him, wat do u think?
- when my handover is complete in a few days, should i ask to go earlier?
- should i apologize to my boss again? or just leave it? i dont want to have more uncomfortable conversations, but then if i dont talk to him now, wont ever again may be.
.
