RANT: People who don't RSVP

#16
Yeah, it is pretty inconsiderate not to RSVP.

But this past summer one of my friends was apparently annoyed at me for not having RSVP'd to her wedding by the reply by date... until she called and I let her know that I never recieved an invitation! Turns out she had wanted to confirm spelling of my bf's name for the invite and then forgot to send it out once she did. Oops.:shame:
 
#17
When my cousin got married I didn't RSVP by mail (her return stamp was Canadian and I'm in the US lol)....so I took the courtesy of calling her, and then having a gift shipped to my mom to give to her.
I mean cmon people...it's the least you can do!
 
#20
caannie said:
It is totally irresponsible for people to not RSVP and then just "show up." People get ruder and ruder every single day, I swear! I feel your pain. I'm one of the (few) people that ALWAYS RSVPs when asked to! ;)
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I agree - the day i got an invite to my brother's wedding, i sent an RSVP....so within 5 hours it was in the post on it's way to him.

I think it's a very small gesture that is absolutely necessary to the smooth running of what is, essentially, a very stressful day!

IMO, it might be a wise idea to include Stamped Addressed Envelopes with the invites - i know that's what i'll be doing...then there's NO excuse to not reply!!:yes:
 
#21
why not embarass them, they by all means deserve it, dont put their names on the registery so when they ask for thier table number they are rudely shocked when there isnt a table waiting for them, have the doorman tell them, they didnt respond to the rsvp and it was assumed that they werent attending. its only fair, if you pity them have a spare table on the side or squeze them in it might be nicer then asking them to leave
 
#22
^^ Love it. Unfortunately I'm getting married in KY, so there will be no doorman. I am numbering the tables (order in which you get food). Anyone not on my seating chart will be back at number 15 or 16....
 
#23
chicky said:
I agree - the day i got an invite to my brother's wedding, i sent an RSVP....so within 5 hours it was in the post on it's way to him.

I think it's a very small gesture that is absolutely necessary to the smooth running of what is, essentially, a very stressful day!

IMO, it might be a wise idea to include Stamped Addressed Envelopes with the invites - i know that's what i'll be doing...then there's NO excuse to not reply!!:yes:
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Chicky, I DID send stamped, addressed envelopes!!! I have paid over 150 dollars on postage for just the invites (not including rehearsal dinner stuff either). Can you believe it????
 
#24
Sanguar said:
Chicky, I DID send stamped, addressed envelopes!!! I have paid over 150 dollars on postage for just the invites (not including rehearsal dinner stuff either). Can you believe it????
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Aah, it's the curse of every bride!! Same thing happened to every married friend I know, even us! And I was really pissed too, since our dinner was $150 a head, so it asn't cheap to factor in the "uncertain" people either. Some people are just SO RUDE!

We did the stamped envelopes AND had an online RSVP option too on our website! Grrr... I feel your pain!
 
#25
has anyone else rsvp'd? thats so annoying i dont know what id do.

tweetie, the online option is a really good idea, esp. in these days. and its good that you had the other option as well for the ppl who are computer illiterate! hehe.
 
#26
i feel so sorry that such a thing is ruining what should be one of the happiest days of your life.. as you said, have a "special" table for ppl who didn't rsvp... make sure you politely point it out to them in case they show up.. wish you so much wonderful things to come on your wedding day..
 
#27
OMG! This is one of my ABSOLUTE, ALL-TIME BIGGEST PET PEEVES (and I haven't had a wedding in almost 25 years!!!) :censor:

I was just thinking about this very thing earlier today. I have a friend (single father) whose daughter is getting married on September 9th and he is sparing no expense - $12,000 dress, historic stone church, putting up all the out-of-towners at the Ritz after the dinner reception at same - nothing has been too good for her. (Fortunately she is a lovely, mature, very appreciative girl so it has been a pleasure watching him help her plan it!) The invites were something like $20.00 each and he/she even commissioned the official White House calligrapher to hand address each one!

The invitations went out two months in advance...here it is barely ten days before the ceremony and out of the 160 invites that were mailed, 77 are still unanswered! Therefore, the bride and groom-to-be are having to make calls to all the guests that have not responded to give the Ritz an accurate head count for dinner! This is a last-minute headache that should not be...both work and travel in their jobs so making calls has not been easy or convenient.

Why do people do this? Is it my imagination or is this much more prevalent than it was 20 years ago? I was not raised with a silver spoon in my mouth, but I was taught that responding to an invitation of ANY sort, no matter how formal or casual, was a must! (And in a timely fashion as well...) I am wondering if that with the increased use of e-mail and computers people are no longer accustomed to sending replies through "snail mail," although I would settle for a call or even an e-mail were I in your shoes!!! Look at it this way - we correspond online, pay our bills online, get our news online, shop and even pay our bills online.

And while we're on the subject - am I the only one who takes offense when I don't receive a thank you of some type (note preferably) for a gift, party, job interview, etc? Have we become a generation of ingrates?

Whew ! That felt good!!! Funny that I would find this when I was just stewing over the same subject a few hours ago. I feel for you, honestly. I think many times those who don't respond have never been in a situation where they have been treated so discourteously themselves. Not an excuse, but maybe a reason...

You don't need this stress! I vote that you create a guest list of those who responded, have a list at the door and those not on the list don't get in like at a celebrity function! (Unless those not responding are known for giving lavish gifts!)

You don't need this stress - it'll show in your photos! ENJOY YOUR DAY! Congratulations, and may you enjoy a lifetime of happiness.

Kim
 
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