Questions on giving kids some independence.

  1. Okay, I'm not feeling so overly-protective after reading some of these responses. I think that I'll just keep doing what I'm doing because it works for us:smile:
    I had a friend, who let her kindergartener walk to school 5 blocks by herself (daily). I know that we live in a relatively "safe" neighborhood, but I thought she was absolutely nuts:weird:
  2. I trust my children to be responsible and make good choices, however I don't trust other people. When my children are outside in the front playing so am I or my DH. When they play in the backyard I check on them since I don't really care for the way the neighbor child behaves. I get told all the time that I'm over protective of my children. I don't care about people's opinions much. They are my kids and it is my job to make sure they are safe.
  3. When considering the neighborhood and safety, do search Ds13 is NOT allowed to bike in a certain direction because of convicted child molesters. Not that there aren't probably child molesters who aren't caught in the other direction, but it's a known risk, so why risk it.

    Also, cars are super obnoxious in our neighborhood, so we did a lot of practice rides and safety lessons prior to biking without me.

    And a safety phone, especially in a larger neighborhood, is highly recommended. We had a biking phone for a while, before ds got his own.
  4. I think it's nuts too. All it takes is a predator to watch for a few days and see this child walking alone everyday and then take her. It happened to Jacee Duggard while her stepfather watched her go to school from the front porch. I figure even if the risk is low, why chance it. I don't know if I'll ever not be at the bus stop, even for high school.
  5. That's how I feel.
  6. I think she is nuts as well.

    We live in a quiet neighborhood, it has since close, but while the older boys were in elementary school it was directly across the street from our house...I wouldn't even let them walk across the street by themselves until 3rd grade and even then I watched from the porch (going and coming) until 5th grade.
  7. When I was a kid, we walked to the library alone, a pair of 6 yos. A mile. I told my Mom she was nuts, and she said, "it was a very different time." Oh ya...
  8. ^ Oh the freedom we had when I was a kid! My kids would NEVER be allowed the sort of freedom at such young ages that we had when I was small.
  9. Same here. We walked all over the place w/o any worries. I would never let my boys do half the stuffer did. It really us a different time.
  10. you struck a cord with me:

    where we live hoards of kids hang outside in the street to play football - this is by NO means a safe thing to do because of the totally crazy driving people do here. imagine someone going 60 km/h in a normal neighbourhood, not looking left or right, and your kid running around in the streets. DH (who is the local) and I are adamant our son will NEVER play in the street like this (there are other parents who feel the same way, it is clear from those around). also I am way too paranoid of the kind of thing that you mentioned - an adult coming with bad intentions. I never want to be sorry about this kind of thing.

    however, my kids had to be independent pretty quickly as they spent the days at daycare, when I am working. teachers or not, kids do have to take care of themselves there. also, when shopping, my son (6) can do quite a few things alone now, and I will only monitor from a distance. so I try to meet his demand for independence this way, giving him some space where I think it is safe. my daughters are too small 4 years and 2 months (lol) they really don't want any independence (except in choosing her clothes and asking for some of my lipstick or eyeshadow being applied)
  11. This is in part, why I started thinking about this topic. Seeing my neighbor kids ride their bikes (alone) up and down my street, I thought about all the freedom I had as a kid and wondered if I was overly protective of my kids. We biked & walked everywhere, we didn't come home until dark, and I don't remember any parents ever checking up on us. I know it was a different time, but it was crazy nonetheless.
  12. Great thread, OP!

    Stressing again the importance of a pedophile check in the neighborhood. I regularly post the link I shared on FB, and a cousin shared it. Her friend was allowing her kids to walk from the bus to an empty house alone and learned a convicted pedophile was in their path. She now has a sitter though the kids are plenty old enough to be alone. Just can't be too caution about protecting innocence, imo. Cuts and scrapes heal. Molestation is a life time of healing.
  13. For every known pedophile/child abuser, how many are unknown? It is important to know of any registered sex offenders in your area, but also important to assume there are more than you know. Recently my husband told me it was ok for my 13yo son to golf, after his lesson, on the course, with a nice retired guy that hangs out at the golf course. When my dh is there they sometimes golf as a threesome, so he feels he 'knows' him. I said no way. Dh looked at me like I was nuts and told me he was fine, he's a nice guy. My response was, "that's what they thought about Jerry Sandusky." Ds is not golfing with anyone without my dh. Dh agrees.
  14. ^I agree. You really can't trust anyone. Sad.
  15. You should assume there are pedophiles everywhere because there are. Registry lists are not going to make any one road safer than another.