Question about engagment rings!!!

courtneyh

O.G.
Oct 9, 2006
3,873
152
PA
Ok this is not really a personal question but i want everyones opinion!!!

my boyfriend and i have talked numerous amounts of times about getting married. We have looked at rings also and we have VERY different taste!!!

this is my question....those of you that are married or engaged did u help pick out the ring or let him know what u like and dont like or did he totally surprise you??
and those of you who arnt what do you think?

i have told him what i like but when i point something out hes like thats ok and when he shows me something i am like ewwww!!!! i just feel like we have to wear the ring every day forever we should love it...i dont want that to sound selfish or anything...just wanted some opinions!!!!
 

Minnie

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Jan 25, 2006
3,864
21
NJ,US
Thats a good question! I think it depends on your relationship with your bf but honestly I don't think its wrong to say this is the style that I like and I would love to have something like this, it fits my personality and this is what i dreamed of! Saying things like this may help! I also think you should not include the carat size you want or being too specific because he may have the funds. I know many people that changed around their engagement rings, if he does get you something you might not like.
 
I was pretty specific about what I wanted and I was fortunate in that my DH wanted to get me a ring that I truly wanted. (ETA: sorry...that's a lot of wants. :blush: )

(I asked for a Tiffany style 6 prong RB in platinum...and I was even b*tchy enough to put in a request for a minimum carat weight. ;) )
 
Jun 27, 2006
4,759
15
my DH and i dated for 5 yrs before we decided to get married. by then, the idea of being surprised with a romantic proposal was not that big of a deal to me anymore and so we decided to shop for the diamond together. once we acquired the stone (princess cut), i got to design my own setting.
 

babyclouds

Member
Oct 7, 2006
509
1
Mile High City
Ideally, he will ask what you like and ask you to point out different styles and cuts of diamonds that you would be happy wearing and then surprise you with it later. But, in reality this might not happen.

Regardless, it's suppose to be a gift you wear for the rest of your life so hopefully you'll grow to love it?!
 

Couturegrl

Addicted to Tiffany's
O.G.
Apr 24, 2006
8,174
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Arizona
LOL he knows how picky I am so we went together and designed my ring...LOL we have had a looooooooong engagement so he already upgraded my setting, which I also picked out!!

I guess it just depends if you have to have something EXACTLY the way you see it in your head or if you are more flexible:smile:
 

missD

O.G.
May 29, 2006
3,259
1,426
ive been with my bf for over 5 years and it seems that 2007 is "the" year! i found some pics from pricescope.com (diamond forum), printed it and gave it to him and said .... sth like THIS PLEASE!
he laughed but agreed, its still a surprise tho. i dont know when he'll get it....but at least i know i'll LOVE it.
 

4everLV

O.G.
Sep 22, 2006
490
7
Canada
My bf was absolutely clueless about rings & diamonds, so we agreed to shop for the engagement ring together...

I educated him about diamonds, & I chose a setting that made us go "wow"... hee hee

but after we got the ring, he kept it, because he has to wait for the right moment to propose to me properly...
 

A-T-G

Howz that ban?
Nov 6, 2006
4,367
7
I got the best of both worlds. My DH surprised me with a proposal and he brought me a "place-holder" ring. Nothing fancy. A simple silver band that I could wear from THE MOMENT. A few weeks later, when our schedules meshed, we went to Tiffany's (Oh, he knew that was where it had to be) and then picked out what I really wanted. He had input! In fact, the ring I ended up getting was the one he pointed out! He watched what I liked and tried on and then pointed to the ring I ended up loving.

I might suggest something like that--a place holder for the "surprise" and then go together to select your actual engagement ring. It takes some of the pressure off them to try to pull of the surprise AND selection:smile:
 

Couturegrl

Addicted to Tiffany's
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Apr 24, 2006
8,174
6
37
Arizona
My bf was absolutely clueless about rings & diamonds, so we agreed to shop for the engagement ring together...

I educated him about diamonds, & I chose a setting that made us go "wow"... hee hee

but after we got the ring, he kept it, because he has to wait for the right moment to propose to me properly...

Heehee my fiancee (then bf) did the same thing to me!! He bought it while I was with him, but then kept it until he proposed like 5 or 6 months later!!
 

ria.laine

Member
Dec 4, 2006
6
0
my boyfriend is planning to propose to me around dec 2008-may 2009.
we have decided that i will pick the ring [it will be a custom design] and print out some pictures of what i want and he will go order it & pick it up when its ready. so i wont see the finished product until the engagement.

so i still get the surprise, but i know i will love it.
i think its important that the ring be something you really love, b/c youre the one that has to wear it everyday.
 

Faith

He makes me smile!
O.G.
Jan 31, 2006
2,381
6
over the moon
I got engaged over the summer. I knew that he was shopping, and we had looked together randomly one day. Well I liked the antique looking rings, and he preferred a more classic, timeless design. He ended up buying me a ring that was more classic, and I LOVE it. There is just someting so special knowing he chose it for me. And the second I saw it, all pictures of antique rings flew right out of my head. When he put the ring on my finger, he said, "I couldn't wait to see it on your finger." It was so cute!
 

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crjhht

O.G.
Jun 7, 2006
1,043
11
la la land...
You are the one that wear it. If you have very different taste than you need to pick it out. If you don't love it you will just wind up wanting a new ring in 5 - 10 years.. trust me I just went thru this. The novelty and romance of "oh he picked it out for me!!!" will wear out fast it you don't LOVE it.
 

winternight

Member
Apr 9, 2006
2,099
9
My fiance and I had talked about marriage but not looked at rings before we got engaged. He surprised me with the proposal (haha sort of) and told me that he'd let me pick out my own ring.

So I've been looking - I've tried to get his input but its basically 'they're all nice' - well this was at Cartier and Tiffany so I'd have to agree. We were comfortable discussing budget which makes me more comfortable when I look. In my case it probably helped that a friend got a bizarre custom ring that we both hate - also I'm picky and he's just rather have me get something I love since I have to look at it. Fiance and I also have different tastes but in his words 'you're the one wearing it.'
 

ilzabet

easily amused
Mar 11, 2006
3,666
8
37
side of the sea
i made it very clear i wanted to pick out my own ring. i love the romantic idea of him picking out something that i LOVE....but our tastes are so different, i knew it wouldn't happen like that. it was easier for everyone involved because i'm so picky, especially when i have a budget. :smile: he didn't want to propose without a ring though, so he bought me something very small and very simple to wear until i found something i liked in our price range. so we both got what we wanted.