Organ Transplants

  1. My fiance (we got engaged this month!) is waiting for a kidney transplant.

    Has anyone here gone through the transplant experience with a loved one? Particularly a spouse/SO?

    He was already on dialysis when we met and started dating (no kidneys at all now), so I have never known a different kind of life with him. We will be starting a series of appointments wherein I can get to meet his team of doctors and get further educated by them, but what I would REALLY like to hear about this kind of experience from an SO's point of view. What to best to support him through all of this (it means A LOT to him when I am able to keep him company at his dialysis sessions) that only an SO would think of...that kind of thing.

    He's a great guy and I just want to do all that I can for him.

    Thanks to anyone who can respond!

    And...any and all prayers would be greatly appreciated!! :yes:
  2. I don't have an SO who went through this, but my uncle had a liver transplant this past year. I can't really give you much advice, but my uncle is doing great now! I'll say a prayer for you guys, and good luck!
  3. Leah, no experience to share but wishing you and your DF the very best and sending you both lots of hugs and good vibes and wishes!
  4. I wish you and him the best of luck as well. As long as you are there for him, that is the best that you can do. I think you could also read up on his medical and prescription insurance so you can be prepared for any costs that may come. He'll be on anti-rejection medications for life, so it's best to read up on the those as well.
  5. Congratulations to both of you on your engagement!! And I sincerely hope that his wait for a kidney is a short one.

    The best way to support him IMO will be to run interference for him while he's in the hospital. I see a lot of patients get too little sleep because of excessive numbers of visitors. Of course everyone means well but the patient needs his rest! Perhaps you can set yourself up as the official liason so that people can check with you about his condition rather than calling or visiting him constantly---and come to think of it, it is difficult for the nurses as well if they are always being interrupted to take phone calls from well-meaning friends and family.
  6. Nerdphanie and Bubbleliciousis: Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. We REALLY appreciate them! :yes:

    Thithi: That part of it scared me, to be honest. I HATE that access to medical care is becoming more and more only for the wealthy. It's criminal. He is confident about the funds being in place for this and I trust in his confidence. Of course, a big, honking lottery win would not be unwelcome! ;)

    Madamefifi: OUTSTANDING suggestion! There ARE certain individuals who are not wanted at the hospital AT ALL! They would be...shall we say...toxic? So to set up some safeguards there is an excellent idea!

    I also plan to seek some legal advice. We hope to be married before the transplant but that may not be possible. (I'm all for just getting together with the rabbi ASAP and just doing it as simply as possible, but his family would kill me). So....if I am NOT his wife, I want to be sure I have some rights in this whole situation. He long ago set up with his brother (an attorney) all the legal needs...advanced directive and all of that....but while his brother would most definitely honor my 'status'...and my DH's wishes....let's just say there might be one family member who would not. And I don't what my status would be with the hospital. G-d forbid any decisions would have to be made without my DF's participation......but HIS needs are my utmost priority.

    You ladies are great! Thanks for the advice and support!! :tup:
  7. You might consider doing a quickie legal wedding while you plan for the big family event. My wedding was in April 2003 but we had actually been married since December so he could get on my health insurance. We just had a quiet ceremony with the JP and my mom. We didn't tell a lot of people. He's Catholic so for him and his family, we were not truly married until the priest blessed us in front of everyone.

    Not being legally married is a huge hassle if you want "next-of-kin" status.
  8. Leah411, first of all, congratulations on your engagement! Secondly, I hope your fiance will be alright. I wish you two a long and healthy life together!
  9. PalmTreeGal:

    I SO hear what you're saying! My head wants to go that direction, but my heart wants to be married Jewishly ASAP. I guess I need to talk to the rabbi.

    Intlset: Thank you so much for the good wishes. At forty-something (ahem! LOL) and having been divorced a number of years...this actually took me by surprise! To all the single gals...never give up hope!
  10. Congratulations on your engagement! My prayers are with you both!

    I don't know if this counts because it wasn't an organ, but when I had my spinal fusion, my doctor used donor bone chips to aid in the surgery.
  11. Leah, please keep us updated! You guys are in my thoughts.