newbie wants very first Chanel bag but!...
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Chanel is a very expensive hobby. A lot of folks have the cash to spare but opt not to coz it's not a necessity in their life. A lot can pay for it on their own but opt not to either coz their money can be used for better things. If you're financially stable now and in the future, then it's a well deserved purchase. If buying a bag means instability, debt, or taking a chunk out of your nest egg, then it's not wise. The bag will always be there. It's a thing. Not as important as the people who love u and looking out for your best interest. If your BF is being unreasonable and controlling, then that's no good. If he's looking out for you, the you need to think twice. Good luck and hope u resolve it. 
Anniev28 said:Chanel is a very expensive hobby. A lot of folks have the cash to spare but opt not to coz it's not a necessity in their life. A lot can pay for it on their own but opt not to either coz their money can be used for better things. If you're financially stable now and in the future, then it's a well deserved purchase. If buying a bag means instability, debt, or taking a chunk out of your nest egg, then it's not wise. The bag will always be there. It's a thing. Not as important as the people who love u and looking out for your best interest. If your BF is being unreasonable and controlling, then that's no good. If he's looking out for you, the you need to think twice. Good luck and hope u resolve it.
Swou said:I think I can relate to the guy. Up until late last year, I would have never in a million years thought I would be spending so much on a bag. And my husband was used to this. The first time I bought a Chanel, a lambskin mini, he was shocked at the price. And so was I
I'm on my 5th bag now, with the latest one having cost 3,750 euros. Once you start it's hard to stop, because you can't really go back to "normal' bags. My husband had real reason to be concernedAlso, it's funny how guilty I felt buying my very first one, and how I didn't even skip a beat buying the 3,750 euros one.
Maybe he worries because he wanted you guys to put money together to invest in your future? I mean, maybe he think he's going to be left to handle everything financially while you use your money for gifts? It wouldn't be very fair in that case. Just my opinion!
I agree... So now I am officially on bags n shoes ban from now on
My hubby doesn't like my handbag addiction too but whenever I buy a new bag he never really gets angry, he does complain a bit but only for a minute or so. I always say to him that the price of my handbag is nothing compare to his hobby of buying and racing race horses
IMO he should not react like the way he did since firstly it's not his money and he shouldn't tell you what you should or should not do with your money
IMO he should not react like the way he did since firstly it's not his money and he shouldn't tell you what you should or should not do with your money
Anniev28 said:Chanel is a very expensive hobby. A lot of folks have the cash to spare but opt not to coz it's not a necessity in their life. A lot can pay for it on their own but opt not to either coz their money can be used for better things. If you're financially stable now and in the future, then it's a well deserved purchase. If buying a bag means instability, debt, or taking a chunk out of your nest egg, then it's not wise. The bag will always be there. It's a thing. Not as important as the people who love u and looking out for your best interest. If your BF is being unreasonable and controlling, then that's no good. If he's looking out for you, the you need to think twice. Good luck and hope u resolve it.
Very well said and I completely agree.
To add... Do you really love the bag or are just wanting to keep up the Jones because your friend has one? Keeping up with the Jones' will never end and one should be true to yourself, your priorities, and what/who you really want and love.
Good luck in your decision.
haha that's so true, I'm probably just rationalising, but that's the way I explain it to my dad. a chanel costs 5 grand a pop. A nice new car costs 50 grand a pop. it's clear that the chanel is the more "frugal" option haha
I don't like getting involved in people's relationships because each is different, but I believe that if its your money you should spend it as you please. Chanel is kind of a slippery slope, but at the same time if you don't have the money it is still nice to go on the forum and even look at the photos (I know I look much more than I buy!)
Your boyfriend should understand that you want this for you - its a treat, not something you do every day. I think he's afraid that you'll start to see this as totally normal or that he won't be able to afford you, I think you need to talk about why it bothers him and explain that you want to do this as a treat to yourself
Your boyfriend should understand that you want this for you - its a treat, not something you do every day. I think he's afraid that you'll start to see this as totally normal or that he won't be able to afford you, I think you need to talk about why it bothers him and explain that you want to do this as a treat to yourself
It doesn't seem that you have the same view on finances as your significant other which is a big red flag.
While we don't get his side of the story, I can understand why he would get riled up over the cost of a luxury bag. It is also unrealistic for any woman to expect men to be ecstatic when spending a lot of money on bags. Men generally do not get bags and the ones who appreciate luxury bags are a rare breed. That being said, for an issue as small as this one, you should be able to discuss a purchase in a mature and calm manner if you are really compatible.
While we don't get his side of the story, I can understand why he would get riled up over the cost of a luxury bag. It is also unrealistic for any woman to expect men to be ecstatic when spending a lot of money on bags. Men generally do not get bags and the ones who appreciate luxury bags are a rare breed. That being said, for an issue as small as this one, you should be able to discuss a purchase in a mature and calm manner if you are really compatible.
Unfortunately a lot of guys (and people in general actually) don't understand that we spend big bucks on things they don't value...sometimes it's better to just not tell them about it, since it's not his cash anyway.
I don't think it matter what ur bf say bc ur money not his and and top of that if u do buy bag that will only last for certain amount of time it technically adds up so as long it's your money no big deal. He has no right to tell you what to do.
And yes my husband seem to be pkey with the whole designer brand and how much they cost. But first he will b*tch about it and then I will always say my money I'll be saving it up for it.
My first Chanel bag WOC and he bought for me for my beat last month.
But as for ur bf u need to give ur self a reward for all that hard work and girls love BAG, SHOES, CLOTHING and the biggest is DIAMOND for me anyways. For guys the love there cars which cost more that you may think
And yes my husband seem to be pkey with the whole designer brand and how much they cost. But first he will b*tch about it and then I will always say my money I'll be saving it up for it.
My first Chanel bag WOC and he bought for me for my beat last month.
But as for ur bf u need to give ur self a reward for all that hard work and girls love BAG, SHOES, CLOTHING and the biggest is DIAMOND for me anyways. For guys the love there cars which cost more that you may think
I seriously suggest, just go and get that bag, if you really want it ! I know $1600 is a large amount of money; but it's YOUR MONEY. Not his
Don't let him discourage you what YOU like, what YOU want to do, and what YOU choose to do. If it is your hard earned money and you think it is worth spending money on a luxury handbag, then go for it! (and I completely agree with rewarding yourself).
I'm no relationship advisor or expert and this is advice coming from a guy, but do not let the guy or ANY GUY get the upperhand in a relationship. If you let him stop you from doing what you want, then sometime down to road want to buy something else, he will have the upperhand and use this situation to his advantage. Breaking up for a bag sounds just silly and if he does break up with you, by all means because he's probably not worth it in the long run anyways.
Please enjoy your decision!!
I'm no relationship advisor or expert and this is advice coming from a guy, but do not let the guy or ANY GUY get the upperhand in a relationship. If you let him stop you from doing what you want, then sometime down to road want to buy something else, he will have the upperhand and use this situation to his advantage. Breaking up for a bag sounds just silly and if he does break up with you, by all means because he's probably not worth it in the long run anyways.
Please enjoy your decision!!
money is a big issue in relationships, but this is your money and you 2 aren't currently married so it's really your call. If it was a big freak out on his part, then that is worrisome (control freak).
A co-worker of mine said he and his wife used to argue over each other's spending habits. They now have a joint account for their household expenses (mortgage, insurance, car, etc). They have one for emergencies, one for vacation money. They each put in based on percentage of what they make (ie. if monthly household is $1000 then he puts in $400 and she puts in $600 - she makes more). Whatever is left of their income is their own to do with what they want. That way they know all the bills are paid, money for emergencies and no one can say boo if he wants to spend $1500 on a bicycle or if she wants to spend a couple of grand on a purse.
A co-worker of mine said he and his wife used to argue over each other's spending habits. They now have a joint account for their household expenses (mortgage, insurance, car, etc). They have one for emergencies, one for vacation money. They each put in based on percentage of what they make (ie. if monthly household is $1000 then he puts in $400 and she puts in $600 - she makes more). Whatever is left of their income is their own to do with what they want. That way they know all the bills are paid, money for emergencies and no one can say boo if he wants to spend $1500 on a bicycle or if she wants to spend a couple of grand on a purse.