My silly grab bag auction idea ~ what would you add?

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  1. I got inspired by the grab bag auction I posted in another thread:

    So here's my imaginary title and listing

    Totally Bizarre Box of Leaves from Adoptastray
    (this is for when I rake the yard)

    BUT WAIT!!!! That's not all. With the first bid I'll include
    001% Authentic Bottega Veneta bag
    Because .001% is your chance of getting a new BV for cheap!

    WAIT AGAIN!!! With the second bid I'll add
    Haunted Vinyl Handbag Spoooooooooooky
    There has been quite a lot of activity since I bought the bag at a thrift store. The odors that emanate from it are other worldly. And as you can see, when photographed under bright lights the bag casts a shadow-gasp! I cannot be held responsible for the activity, or lack of activity, once shipped.

    WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! And for a third bid I'll add
    A peanut shaped like a peanut!!!!!
    I say, let's have peanuts that look like peanuts for goodness sakes

    WAIT! EVEN MORE! And for a fourth bid I'll add
    A Genuwine Balenseeaga Handbag
    DO NOT ask me for more photos. Az you kan see this bag is awthentic.

    ARE YOU STILL WAITING?! Good, for a fifth bid I'll add
    NWT Brown Leather Handbag
    I say this is new with tags because it is new to me after my cousin gave it to me and the tags are still in the pocket. I have wiped up all the cigarette ash.

    Attached Files:

  2. :roflmfao: lol - i especially like the haunted bag!!!
  3. A peanut... shaped like a........... wait for it......... PEANUT!

  4. i'd offer free shipping only if the buyer promises to ding your stars on shipping cost.

    also zoom out and blur the pics so that the buyer feels like they're seeing double. shrink the (single) pic, darken and crop out the bag's straps, corner edges and any hardware.

    assure the buyer that the bags are in "like new" and "gently carried" condition even though you were compelled to use the bags to rescue and transport a hoarder's 40 ferrets that were all later found to be rabid (and not litter trained).

    include the original receipt from "adoptastray inc" that's handwritten in crayon and officially signed with a paw print.
  5. OMG!!!!!! You guys made me snort coffee out my nose with your comments. And that hurts! Plus you keep smelling coffee for a while.
  6. Sad... but true.
    This also made coffee come out of my nose. Ouch is right.
  7. That is hysterical.
  8. What if I just want the peanut? Do you have more than one peanut shaped like a peanut? Because that would be AWESOME!!!!
  9. No, I will not sell just the peanut. WHAT IS WRONG WITH BUYERS ON EBAY??!! CAN'T YOU READ?! There have to be 3 bids for the peanut to be included. FURTHER, I am not RESPONSIBLE for the peanut once it leaves my house, ESPECIALLY if you decide not to pay to insure the peanut!!!!

    You, the buyer, are fully responsible for EVERYTHING in my opinion!
  10. :crybaby::crybaby::crybaby:
  11. Aaaaaaack! Can't breathe. So funny!
  12. :woohoo::woohoo::roflmfao::roflmfao::roflmfao: My stomach hurts!!!!!!!!
  13. Hilarious!!!
  14. As an extra special thank you bonus- I will include a Kool-Aid Jammers make-up pouch filled with make-up. I was cleaning out my make-up bin and discovered some lightly used (really you can't even tell and don't mind the cakey-ness) eyeshadows, pressed powder compact w/ broken mirrior - I'm not responsible for your luck- and some mascara that I think is still good, I just can't get the bottle open. Hint: I would use needle-nose pliers once you get this. It should open then. I would try but I wouldn't want to dent the bottle....:P:yucky: LOL!
  15. Gentle bump b/c this is so hilarious and I'd like some more laughs out of this one- I need them after the fiasco I'm dealing with with fbay.