Motherly/Sisterly advice needed

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IntlSet

IntlSet

Bonjour!
Jan 29, 2006
12,369
63
#1
Playing hard to get... does it work?

I tend to date boys slightly older, generally very busy, and I've never played hard to get. In fact, one of the things they always say about me is: "It's just so easy to be with you."

I really like this boy. He's super cute, hyper-ambitious and accomplished and I would like to snag him with my feminine wiles. I get the feeling he's not so into getting what he wants the easy way.

Should I try to hard-to-get card? I know I'm going to hear "be yourself" but when I'm "myself" around a boy I like, I'm basically a melted puddle of twiddling giggles. It's not very charming.

Thanks, ladies. :shame:
 
#2
My gut says be yourself.

Some guys don't mind if the girl is hard to get while some don't like those kind of girls cause they think it's wasting their time and they don't like playing games or something.

I hope someone else gives you better answers than me. I can only speak from experiences my friends went through.
 
#3
P.S. Some guys find that "melted puddle of twiddling giggles" cute.

Bottomline is if they're into you and find out the real you later on and felt mislead.....they're not going to like it. Upside to it is they find the real you and goes WOW!
 
#4
I say be yourself. From my experience, the men I dated hated playing games. I hated it as well. He should like you for who you are and if doesn't it's his loss. Goodluck :biggrin:
 
#5
I think if he's into you, even if he likes "challenges" in getting other things in life, he will not mind having someone who melt into a puddle over him. :smile: it's sweet.
 
#6
Play the Diva. Most men want to hunt and easy targets get forgotten easily. This doesn't mean that you can't be yourself when you are with him. When he calls don't jump on the idea of a date play: Hmmh I just have to think if I'm available at that day -oh no sorry I can't but we can do it on another day. Don't tell him what you are doing. When he calls don't sound over exited just normal and friendly. My biggest rule is: Never ever kiss on the first date and no sex for the first 4 weeks. If you tease him for 4 weeks and he's not allowed to get into your pants you'll have a starving but satisfied guy after the first time. I know those games are pretty annoying but men are easy and they just love a difficult hunt. My mum always said: Don't sell yourself under your market value:smile: Hope it works:it did with me though 10 years.
 
#7
Tanja said:
Play the Diva. Most men want to hunt and easy targets get forgotten easily. This doesn't mean that you can't be yourself when you are with him. When he calls don't jump on the idea of a date play: Hmmh I just have to think if I'm available at that day -oh no sorry I can't but we can do it on another day. Don't tell him what you are doing. When he calls don't sound over exited just normal and friendly. My biggest rule is: Never ever kiss on the first date and no sex for the first 4 weeks. If you tease him for 4 weeks and he's not allowed to get into your pants you'll have a starving but satisfied guy after the first time. I know those games are pretty annoying but men are easy and they just love a difficult hunt. My mum always said: Don't sell yourself under your market value:smile: Hope it works:it did with me though 10 years.
Click to expand...

LOL Tanja! I like your advice....
 
#9
I agree with waiting a little. With my husband, I made him call me. I just told him that would be the way it was, because I was old fashioned. I waited 4 weeks as well.
If he is really into you, I don't think he will mind this. No man wants to think his possible wife/fiance or girlfriend has been around. Even today, they say the double standard hasn't changed. I generally agree. It isn't the 1950's, but it never hurts to have a little class.
Also, be yourself, in the long run you want a guy that likes the real you.
 
#11
My DH sounds a lot like the guy you like. UBER-ambitious and gets what he wants pretty easily.
It wasn't until I dumped him after dating for 3 yrs that he finally wised up and proposed to me! LOL!
If I had just not been quite so available for so long, he would've put more effort into the relationship earlier.
If your guy seems like he likes a little chase, give it to him I say.
I don't like playing games AT ALL but not everyone adores girls waiting by teh phone. Even if you're not desperate, it seems that way, KWIM?


{when I say 'you' I don't mean "YOU"}
 
#12
My advise is be yourself. You are who you are. I say don't change for anybody. If he's interested great! If not, his loss. Game playing never really works out in the end IMO. Good luck!
 
#14
Be yourself, but by that I mean live your own life, don't give everything up to be a part of his. If he's truly worth being with you, he'll appreciate you for the smart, stylish, fantastic person that you are. No guy wants a clingy, needy chick waiting by the phone....let him see that although you enjoy his company, you can manage just fine without him!
 
#15
Hey girl,
I can tell you that to start off in a new relationship, guys really love confidence in a woman. Its a total turn on to them. So just be the beautiful girl you are, mix that in with kindness, and honesty, and you have a great recipe for a great relationship. And honestely if that dosent work and he dosent like you for who you are. He isnt worth you time! And then its NEXT PLEASE! LOL :smile:
 
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