Just because a movie is rated "R" for "nudity and sexual situations" doesn't mean you're always going to get a loin-heating treat. You might actually be getting . . . some of this: 8. Casino Lovebirds: Joe Pesci and Sharon Stone Pairing Stone with Pesci is like watching a chihuahua hump Yao Ming's leg. It doesn't matter that Stone's desperate mob wife was willing to do anything together hands on wealth, this coupling is a crime against nature and physics. Although it is rumored to be a favorite of Tom Cruise's. 7. The Cooler Lovebirds: William H. Macy and Maria Bello If you asked 10 random women which actor they would like to see buck naked and screwing a cocktail waitress, not only would zero of them say Macy, at least seven of them would go out of their way to say "Anyone, as long as it isn't William H. Macy. Bello went "warts and all," too. But, c'mon - would you work out as strenuously if you knew your costar was only going to be Macy?