Marriage it the end?

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  1. I just have a quick DH and I decided that we want to enter marriage counceling because things have just been different between us. We dont act around each other the way we use to and my DH thinks marriage counceling would be the best bet...but im a little nervous. When I hear about marriage counceling, alot of people seem to think it signals the end but what do you think? Should we give it a try? I dont want to give up on my marriage...
  2. No, it's not the end of'll probably teach you different ways of communicating with each other effectively. Since you are in a growing marriage, have small children and also live with your parents I'm sure it contributes to some tensions in your marriage. This may be a way for your husband and you to talk about what has been bothering either of you and make a valuable step forward together.
  3. The fact you don't want to give up your marriage should signal to you that it's not the end, but that's just my opinion :shrugs:

    Good luck and I hope everything works out for you.
  4. It's way healthier than living with your troubles OR divorce. Good luck to you both and stick with it.
  5. It think it's the beginning of a whole new era in your marriage.
  6. Thanks guys for your encouraging words. Living with your parents definently puts some strains because we cant seem to have a normal private life without my mother or father finding out about our problems. I guess the only reason i got upset is because my parents went to counceling and their marriage is falling apart and my mom told my dad that my DH and I wanted to go to therapy and that she didnt think we would be together much longer which really hurt. I dont want to go down the same path my parents did.
  7. It is not the end , don't even think of it like that ... go into this with positive thoughts and you will be stronger as a couple than ever. Your DH obviously thinks the world of you and doesn't want it to be the end either as he suggested the councelling. I hope everything works out for you both :yes:
  8. nope it's not the end. and you should do it precisely to figure out how to correct what's not right and figure out what the issues are.

    I suggest you go to a counselor that is more focused on helping both of you to make this marriage work rather than the ones that focus on what each individual wants. different counselors have different approaches.

    it's common to think that u're going to follow in ur parent's footsteps but don't let what happened to themn make you think that you're going to end up taking the same road. make and create your own path.
  9. Sometimes this can really help a relationship... so give it a go and let him know you do not want to give up on one another. :yes:

  10. I honestly think it's a positive thing to do marriage councelling. I mean, a lot of marriages fall apart because of bad communication. With counselling you both can say what you need to say that's been on your mind and no one can walk out. I think it's a good way to start fixing some problems.

    I wish the best for you and your husband!
  11. No, it does not signal the end. It shows that you two were able to realize that there was a problem with your relationship and took the steps needed for it to potentially get better.

    You two will learn a lot in M.C.: a lot about eachother, and a lot about how to communicate correctly and efficiently.

    Wish the two of you the best of luck!
  12. The very fact that he suggested this instead of divorce makes me think that it's a GOOD thing. That at least you guys will be willing to try
  13. I think it signals the both of you wanting to make things better instead of walking away. Very mature of you guys.

    My bf and I are going to go to couples counseling once we move in together... we are of different religions and backgrounds, so we're going to need help on that. I look forward to it though!
  14. Socal, I hope I'm not out of line here, but do you think that has anything to do with why you guys are having problems? I couldn't not imagine living with my husband and kids (I'm married with kids also) under my parents roof. It would not work, I would want to kill someone. I love my privacy and I firmly believe a married couple should have there own space. Especially since you have kids now. It's not healthy. And you said they are having problems also, that can't be good at all. I think things would change dramatically if you two got a place of your own. But again I don't know your situation of why your living with them. But Marriage Counseling could be a new beginning, but I have a feeling once you tell the counselor that you guys are living with your parents he/she will basically have summed it up. Good Luck and don't give up .
  15. I agree with the other posters that going to therapy is a GOOD thing.

    A good relationship counselor should be able to help you find better ways to communicate and avoid harmful patterns of behavior.