Low moment last night.

  1. Okay so this week is the prime “O” week and I have been trying all week to get DH in the mood and motivated to BD and it has not worked. Nothing! He says “It’s not you it’s me”. BLAH - Whatever. I am beginning to feel like maybe he is not ready after all or maybe even does not want kids. I feel like I am wasting my time trying to time it all and everything. I cried myself to sleep last night because I felt like either I was a failure and that he had given up on trying or I felt mad at him for not making an effort or at least telling me what the real problem was. I mean if he is not ready for kids then he needs to tell me and quit beating around the bush. It was a low moment for me and I am so ready to be pregnant and have children. Another month down the drain with no results. And now I can not even get him to be interested to BD. I think I am losing it. I try not to make it seem like a chore, ya know. I try to spice things up…. but for him to say “it’s not you it’s me” just makes me angry and sad. Another wasted opportunity is how I see it. I am rambling on now. Sorry I needed to vent!!
  2. {{{ Jenni }}}

    Is your DH under lots of stress at work? My DH once complained that I "use" him to have baby :shame: and have no mood except the few days around "O-ing".

    It's time for you two to talk, let the frustuation out. It takes two to tango! We are in a hurry to have kids, but men usually don't know the consequences -- high risk pregnancy, physical changes, infertility.

    Maybe plan a weekend getaway? Take BD off your mind and just enjoy each other's company?

    Vent all you can!
  3. ^ thanks beejerry. Yes we do need to talk and figure out what is going on. I do not think he under any abnormal amount of stress at work or at home.
  4. Sometimes I think men have hormones changes too :thinking:
  5. Husbands take so much longer... they thing in terms of "how do I provide for a family?" I don't think alot of men are eager to jump into that position. It took DH a few months of trying to actually be dissappointed that we weren't getting pregnant.

  6. Hopefully that is what is going on. We have been trying since September so it hasn't been extremely long...
  7. I feel your pain.
    I too have a DH that tells me I am only interested in BD'ing around O. And he has definitely spited me by withholding. ROLE REVERSAL!!
    I try my best to compensate for his needs, I feel he owes it to me during the few days that pregnancy is possible.
    MEN!! ARGGHH!!:cursing:
  8. I am so sorry-the great thing is that the forum is a wonderful place to seek support. I know that sometimes, men blame the struggles of getting pregnant on their "manhood". I agree with trying to plan a weekend getaway or a romantic night where baby making isn't the theme.
  9. Yes, it's a good place to get support...Maybe if you take a little mini vaca and reconnect and talk about things, it'll be good. It can be so consuming TTC. Maybe you can talk and maybe ask him what he's feeling about it or what is actually really bothering him.
  10. Do you ladies think that men hate to be "on-schedule"? That probably kills 50% off the fun from BDing?
  11. I just saw this smilie, so cute!

  12. <<<<HUGS>>>>>>

    My husband felt the same way especially when I got upset since nothing happened for awhile.

    When I look back now, I think he was under a lot of pressure, not from work or something else, it is solely from baby making.

    He said the same thing, I only interested on him when I was "O". I ended up like you crying and asked him if he wanted kids. He said he does want kids, however, the pressure is too much.

    Guys usuallly hide their feelings more than us.

    Maybe take a few months off of trying. Or not telling him when is your peak days, just you know the days yourself and BD every other day.

    Good Luck!!!!!
  13. Next time it's O time, don't tell him! Just seduce him for no apparent reason LOL then it won't seem so "mechanical" KWIM?
  14. Great advice everyone and thanks again for listening. He made up for his "absence" last night and maybe it will still be good timing...I think yesterday was the last day so we'll see. But thanks for the encouragement and for listening.
  15. Glad to hear that jenn.