That's awesome that you enjoy the solitude! I get it. Its like finally I get to enjoy being alone without the stigma lol. Sometimes I enjoy it too, but its strange because I'm sort of an introverted extrovert. Like deep down I wanna be extroverted so bad and be around people, but my social anxiety holds me back. I feel like if I didn't feel "forced" to be alone (because of my social anxiety) I'd actually enjoy it. There's probably some psychology behind when something isn't your choice you hate it but if you got to choose then you'd probably enjoy it.
I definitely just feel so defeated with these new variants too. There's seems to be a new one every other week...It's getting really exhausting. My area is talking about doing another lockdown and its like...Man! COVID started when I was only a junior in high school! Now I'm in my second year of college lol. So it does sort of feel like I'm wasting these years of my life since as I was growing up I was so excited to experience college life, yet in actuality its just been a bunch of online classes so far.
I try to do things on my own but I don't enjoy it! It's so weird! If I'm with my family, we make jokes and talk about stuff and it keeps me company when I'm out. But now that I live alone, I try doing the same things (hiking, boating, golfing, etc) but doing it alone just doesn't feel right. Like I said its probably because I'm sort of an extrovert. I actually have no clue. Its so weird how I hate being around people but for some reason I despise being alone. I do draw though, I recently got in to modified studies and still lifes, and its really fun..But once again that's something I do alone in my room.
I'd love to get in to figure skating, I did it when I was way younger. That's something I think I could really enjoy doing alone. But now that I'm 19 and haven't done it in like YEARS I'm too nervous. I just feel way too old to start it up again, I feel like the experienced skaters in the rink who've been doing it since they were kids would judge me. I wish I could just rent out an entire rink for myself, now that would be nice!