Kitty problem...

May 26, 2011
323
3
Clearwater, FL
I've had my cat CJ for 7 and a half years. I got him when he was barely 6 weeks old, and I've always said he picked me as his owner...Jumped in my lap and wouldn't get down. Haha

Here's my problem: CJ follows me around everywhere, constantly. When I'm taking a bath, he's on the edge of the tub. When I straighten my hair, he's on the counter watching. When I'm sitting down, he wants to be in my lap. If I somehow manage to get into my room without him following me in, he sits outside of the door and cries with his paw under the door. If he sees my dog getting attention from me, he attacks him. When I go to sleep, he curls up ON my face. If he can't find me around the house, he walks around meowing, looking for me. My dad said when I leave in the morning, CJ sits by the window crying. After awhile, he'll go sit by my room door until my dad lets him in, then he'll go sleep in my shoes for a while. Dad said he stops crying about an hour after I leave and he's okay until I get home, but when I do then it's like he lights up and is a totally different cat, very playful and happy. (When I'm gone, he mostly sleeps.) I've told his vet, but he says that's normal for some cats, and he's not suffering from separation anxiety. Does anyone else have a cat like this? Is that really how some cats are naturally? None of my other cats seem to care one way or another if we're home or not!

This is my CJ. :smile:

image-1086217516.png
 

bnjj

Jovi Junkie
O.G.
Apr 20, 2007
10,215
14
Bon Jovi Blvd.
Yes, my male cat is just like this. He is stuck to me like glue. It's cute but also annoying at times.

Some cats, like my female kitty, are very aloof; others are incredibly needy.
 

poopsie

How Sentimental
O.G.
Jan 14, 2009
12,547
3,889
Where the wild things are
Maybe kitty was taken too soon from mama cat? 6 weeks seems awfully young. No offense to the vet, but if that doesn't qualify for separation anxiety, what does? :confused1:
OTOH it is nice to know you're loved! :biggrin:
 
May 26, 2011
323
3
Clearwater, FL
bnjj said:
Yes, my male cat is just like this. He is stuck to me like glue. It's cute but also annoying at times.

Some cats, like my female kitty, are very aloof; others are incredibly needy.
I agree, it is adorable...but sometimes I'd like to be able to take a bath alone. Haha
 
May 26, 2011
323
3
Clearwater, FL
poopsie2 said:
Maybe kitty was taken too soon from mama cat? 6 weeks seems awfully young. No offense to the vet, but if that doesn't qualify for separation anxiety, what does? :confused1:
OTOH it is nice to know you're loved! :biggrin:
Personally, I think this is a textbook case of separation anxiety, but the vet doesn't agree, so what do I know?

His mama more or less abandoned them when they were about 4 weeks old. She was my cousin's cat, and she would run off for days at a time. The vet said CJ sees me as his mom, and he just likes to stick close to me. I am definitely loved, though! Haha
 

poopsie

How Sentimental
O.G.
Jan 14, 2009
12,547
3,889
Where the wild things are
Don't sell yourself short...........vets run the gamut from the very good to the appallingly bad, just like any other profession. I have been with my vet for almost 20 years.....and she is honest enough to admit that every day is a learning experience. They only teach so much in vet (or any) school and there is no substitute for experience.
If there is another vet in the area perhaps a second opinion?

Although I have never tried it I have seen Feliway mentioned numerous times on this forum, so that might be worth looking into.
 

Querencia

Member
Feb 25, 2011
90
0
My little geriatric gentleman who was with me for nearly 21 years was like this and Jack is getting to be like this now. When I leave he follows me to the door, when I come home he's usually waiting by the door like a dog. I haven't had any aggression problems with him but when he gets upset that someone else is getting attention he tends to just hipcheck them out of his way and take his place on my lap. Bonus humour points when he jams himself between my boyfriend and me at night then kicks off with his back against me and feet against my boyfriend making room for himself ;)

on a serious note.. they get devoted like a dog and I tend to treat them more like a dog.. give them puzzle toys with treats for when I'm gone. not make a big deal about leaving. I'd like to scoop the furball up and smooch him before I leave but it will only wind him up more. Same thing for coming home. I make myself be much, much lower key than I'd prefer. I do put out special toys/catnip or the puzzle treats when I go out so he has something to possibly occupy him, as well as the others. I have webcams set up for them and it's pretty effective. They all do some pacing, waiting at the door, staring.. then even Jack goes about his cat life eventually though he's amazing being at the door and waiting..
I also use the feliway thingie though I have no idea how effective it is.

I feel for you on the bath thing. I have a shelf that I put a glass of wine or my tea on and a book.. or use to. Now it's a cat shelf :/ Certainly keeps me on top of their grooming since I don't want a furry bath though.
I feel for you and CJ, who is a cutie btw, but I've never found any great solutions for me or my menagerie with it either.. will be reading the thread.
 

clevercat

catwoman
Sep 29, 2008
13,345
4,465
Where the heart is
My cat Clyde was like this - as was Lupe. Both had very troubled lives before they came to me. I was an inexperienced cat owner when I had Clyde and didn't recognise separation anxiety....neither did my then-vet. By the time Loops came along, I knew sooo much more....he was terribly aggressive towards two of my other cats - and towards me, if he could see I was ready to go out. In your position I would second poopsie's idea of getting another opinion. It took us a while but I believe we now have a wonderful vet - one who listens and one who is constantly learning herself.
For your boy (and he is a cutie, BTW!), Feliway diffusers worked well for Lupe as did a product called Zylkene, which is a non-habit forming natural product that I'm sure a vet would explain far better than I ever could! Good luck.
 
May 26, 2011
323
3
Clearwater, FL
Don't sell yourself short...........vets run the gamut from the very good to the appallingly bad, just like any other profession. I have been with my vet for almost 20 years.....and she is honest enough to admit that every day is a learning experience. They only teach so much in vet (or any) school and there is no substitute for experience.
If there is another vet in the area perhaps a second opinion?

Although I have never tried it I have seen Feliway mentioned numerous times on this forum, so that might be worth looking into.
I've tried Feliway, but it doesn't work with him. It works with our other cats, but it doesn't faze CJ at all. I love my little kitty, but I just don't want him to feel anxious when I'm not there. I don't mind him being in my feet all of the time, but it hurts my heart to think that he's upset when I'm not around, you know?

My little geriatric gentleman who was with me for nearly 21 years was like this and Jack is getting to be like this now. When I leave he follows me to the door, when I come home he's usually waiting by the door like a dog. I haven't had any aggression problems with him but when he gets upset that someone else is getting attention he tends to just hipcheck them out of his way and take his place on my lap. Bonus humour points when he jams himself between my boyfriend and me at night then kicks off with his back against me and feet against my boyfriend making room for himself ;)

on a serious note.. they get devoted like a dog and I tend to treat them more like a dog.. give them puzzle toys with treats for when I'm gone. not make a big deal about leaving. I'd like to scoop the furball up and smooch him before I leave but it will only wind him up more. Same thing for coming home. I make myself be much, much lower key than I'd prefer. I do put out special toys/catnip or the puzzle treats when I go out so he has something to possibly occupy him, as well as the others. I have webcams set up for them and it's pretty effective. They all do some pacing, waiting at the door, staring.. then even Jack goes about his cat life eventually though he's amazing being at the door and waiting..
I also use the feliway thingie though I have no idea how effective it is.

I feel for you on the bath thing. I have a shelf that I put a glass of wine or my tea on and a book.. or use to. Now it's a cat shelf :/ Certainly keeps me on top of their grooming since I don't want a furry bath though.
I feel for you and CJ, who is a cutie btw, but I've never found any great solutions for me or my menagerie with it either.. will be reading the thread.
I am the first to admit, I do treat him like a child, so maybe this is largely my fault. When I got CJ, my heart was broken because the cat I'd had since childhood had recently been killed by a wild alligator from our bayou. When CJ was a kitten, I just held him a lot and would bring him with me everywhere I went in the house. Maybe he's just that way because of the way he was raised with me?

I will definitely buy him some toys and see if that works. That's a great idea! He does love him some catnip, so maybe that'll take his mind off of me leaving. My dad said he does play with the other inside cats sometimes, but he mostly sleeps. He is quite aggressive, though, even when I'm not around. He will not hesitate to fight the big dogs outside, including the Saint Bernard and the Boxer. No cat in the house is safe, especially Sam (in my avatar) because Sam will not fight back, just cry. My little Chihuahua has to defend himself from CJ almost every night, because they will fight over who gets to sleep by me. If I tell him no, or don't let him go into a room he wants to go in, he will bite me on the leg. He's not a mean cat at all, but he will definitely fight for what he wants. It's actually kind of cute, because when CJ walks outside, the big dogs run for cover.

Thank you for the compliment! I had never seen a cat with a dot pattern on their fur until I got him.

My cat Clyde was like this - as was Lupe. Both had very troubled lives before they came to me. I was an inexperienced cat owner when I had Clyde and didn't recognise separation anxiety....neither did my then-vet. By the time Loops came along, I knew sooo much more....he was terribly aggressive towards two of my other cats - and towards me, if he could see I was ready to go out. In your position I would second poopsie's idea of getting another opinion. It took us a while but I believe we now have a wonderful vet - one who listens and one who is constantly learning herself.
For your boy (and he is a cutie, BTW!), Feliway diffusers worked well for Lupe as did a product called Zylkene, which is a non-habit forming natural product that I'm sure a vet would explain far better than I ever could! Good luck.
What does the vet do to help the animal with separation anxiety? Is it something CJ will just have to live with, or is there some way to help him?

Thank you! :smile:
 

clevercat

catwoman
Sep 29, 2008
13,345
4,465
Where the heart is
I've tried Feliway, but it doesn't work with him. It works with our other cats, but it doesn't faze CJ at all. I love my little kitty, but I just don't want him to feel anxious when I'm not there. I don't mind him being in my feet all of the time, but it hurts my heart to think that he's upset when I'm not around, you know?



I am the first to admit, I do treat him like a child, so maybe this is largely my fault. When I got CJ, my heart was broken because the cat I'd had since childhood had recently been killed by a wild alligator from our bayou. When CJ was a kitten, I just held him a lot and would bring him with me everywhere I went in the house. Maybe he's just that way because of the way he was raised with me?

I will definitely buy him some toys and see if that works. That's a great idea! He does love him some catnip, so maybe that'll take his mind off of me leaving. My dad said he does play with the other inside cats sometimes, but he mostly sleeps. He is quite aggressive, though, even when I'm not around. He will not hesitate to fight the big dogs outside, including the Saint Bernard and the Boxer. No cat in the house is safe, especially Sam (in my avatar) because Sam will not fight back, just cry. My little Chihuahua has to defend himself from CJ almost every night, because they will fight over who gets to sleep by me. If I tell him no, or don't let him go into a room he wants to go in, he will bite me on the leg. He's not a mean cat at all, but he will definitely fight for what he wants. It's actually kind of cute, because when CJ walks outside, the big dogs run for cover.

Thank you for the compliment! I had never seen a cat with a dot pattern on their fur until I got him.



What does the vet do to help the animal with separation anxiety? Is it something CJ will just have to live with, or is there some way to help him?

Thank you! :smile:
Lupe was on Zylkene for a few weeks,which made him much calmer. I was also told to leave him with something I had worn when I left him. Also, not making a big fuss of him as I left the house and came back, but just to let him 'be'. Every cat will respond differently - see if you can find another vet,one who will listen to your concerns. Also, it may be worth seeking the opinion of a cat behaviourist- perhaps your vet can recommend someone? Lots of luck!
 

Sez

Bag lady
O.G.
Apr 17, 2007
793
0
London
I am the first to admit, I do treat him like a child, so maybe this is largely my fault.
Don't blame yourself, I think the problem is much more likely to stem from him being taken from his mum too early, before eight weeks they aren't ready to be alone in the world. I would also recommend Zylkene for him if Feliway didn't work. Royal Canin also do a 'calm' food, which one of my friends has had very good results with.

And PS what a gorgeous little puss!
 

Querencia

Member
Feb 25, 2011
90
0
Hey, didn't mean for you to blame yourself. I am a shameless pet snuggler and babytalker to them... I just mean I try to give off the vibe that's going to be most supportive to them if there's something that stresses them out. Not sure how else to put it other than that. If they're suspicious and uneasy about something I stay upbeat and lowkey about it. If they get tense about me leaving I stay lowkey and cheerful and try to not make a big deal about it. They are very quick to pick up on my mood so I just try to keep that in mind, if that makes sense?

I'm really interested in the Zylkene people have mentioned. I want to talk to my vet about it now.
 
May 26, 2011
323
3
Clearwater, FL
Sez said:
Don't blame yourself, I think the problem is much more likely to stem from him being taken from his mum too early, before eight weeks they aren't ready to be alone in the world. I would also recommend Zylkene for him if Feliway didn't work. Royal Canin also do a 'calm' food, which one of my friends has had very good results with.

And PS what a gorgeous little puss!
Thank you. :smile: I'll speak to my vet about your suggestions! I appreciate it
 
May 26, 2011
323
3
Clearwater, FL
Querencia said:
Hey, didn't mean for you to blame yourself. I am a shameless pet snuggler and babytalker to them... I just mean I try to give off the vibe that's going to be most supportive to them if there's something that stresses them out. Not sure how else to put it other than that. If they're suspicious and uneasy about something I stay upbeat and lowkey about it. If they get tense about me leaving I stay lowkey and cheerful and try to not make a big deal about it. They are very quick to pick up on my mood so I just try to keep that in mind, if that makes sense?

I'm really interested in the Zylkene people have mentioned. I want to talk to my vet about it now.
Oh no, I didn't mean to imply that you made me feel that way! Just thinking aloud, really. And yes, you definitely made sense. I'm gonna try to do the same with CJ, and hopefully that will work, or at least help.