Is it normal to feel this way?
- Thread starter miss_fleur
- Start date
^ yep, I agree. dwelling in the past or worrying constantly about the future is not living life - I understand people do both (and yes I do too) but you gotta limit that.
I get a bit sentimental around my bday but I have never looked back thinking I missed something or I want those days back. enjoy yourself now with whatever makes you happy. oh, and happy birthday!!!!
I get a bit sentimental around my bday but I have never looked back thinking I missed something or I want those days back. enjoy yourself now with whatever makes you happy. oh, and happy birthday!!!!
I wish I was having a 1/4 life crisis on my next birthday . The birthday that got to me was my last one (35). In my head I am still 19 joining the RAF, my birth certificate tells me I'm 36 this year, my body soon tells me I'm over 40 when I try to keep up and overtake the young 19/20 yr olds that I manage.
And then there are times like this when I smile to myself and thank heaven that I do not have to go through all those insecurities again.
You are totally normal - we all have our wibbles at different times.
I try to look forward to the future without wishing my life away. I'm going to be 20 this year too.
I feel like you sometimes because I've always stayed in and worked my arse off at the expense of being social. However I observe that there are very few who can maintain good grades and also attend every social gathering going. A lot of the crazily social people I knew in high school now have gotten jobs, gotten married, had a couple of children etc... but I would truly hate to be doing that now, and I feel better knowing that I'm doing what I've always wanted to (medicine) even if it's taken me ages.
If you're on the right track now, you probably did all the right things back when you were 14 or 17. So you didn't waste your childhood. I think things are going to get better and better. Just enjoy each day as it comes.
Birthdays are emotional times; I hope you feel better soon!
I feel like you sometimes because I've always stayed in and worked my arse off at the expense of being social. However I observe that there are very few who can maintain good grades and also attend every social gathering going. A lot of the crazily social people I knew in high school now have gotten jobs, gotten married, had a couple of children etc... but I would truly hate to be doing that now, and I feel better knowing that I'm doing what I've always wanted to (medicine) even if it's taken me ages.
If you're on the right track now, you probably did all the right things back when you were 14 or 17. So you didn't waste your childhood. I think things are going to get better and better. Just enjoy each day as it comes.
Birthdays are emotional times; I hope you feel better soon!
First of all, I wish you a Happy Birthday! I have had this feeling every year on my b-day since I turned 25 (now 33). How I wish I did things differently. I had a child my senior year in high school, married my high school sweetheart who turned out to be a major loser. Although I would do things differently if I had the chance, I couldn't say getting pregnant was "a mistake I would regret." My son is my rock, he is intelligent, respectful, just perfect... I live my life to the fullest and continously work on ensuring that my son does the same, with no regrets....
Enjoy your life, because it is indeed too short....
Enjoy your life, because it is indeed too short....
Happy Birthday, and don't be blue.
You're just starting, ( a spring chicken really...compared to me;I'm twice your age). It is good to develop a sense of discipline now, and to have a mature head on your shoulders. That way when the big choices in life come along, you'll have a level head to deal with them. Fun and play come along at any age. Think of it as building a foundation.
Growing up isn't a bad place. I feel like I'm having more fun now than when I was in my twenties, moreso because I have a great guy that I'm sharing it with. Be the best you can be at every age...you can't lose!
You're just starting, ( a spring chicken really...compared to me;I'm twice your age). It is good to develop a sense of discipline now, and to have a mature head on your shoulders. That way when the big choices in life come along, you'll have a level head to deal with them. Fun and play come along at any age. Think of it as building a foundation.
Growing up isn't a bad place. I feel like I'm having more fun now than when I was in my twenties, moreso because I have a great guy that I'm sharing it with. Be the best you can be at every age...you can't lose!
Awww today should be a happy day for you. Worry about that stuff after your B-day. But I understand exactly what your going through, I call it pre mid life crisis. Trust me there is an end to that tunnel, I'm nearing it but not quite there yet. But I'm sure you'll find your way!!! HAPPY BDAY!!!
Happy birthday girl!! Don't worry... you're not alone with the whole quarterly-life crisis feeling. I've been going through that a little myself since I'm still trying to finish school and I'm almost in my late 20s! Looking bad, I feel that all I've been doing is study study study. My 20s have been a blur to me since all I can remember is alot of books and sitting in front of the computer while my friends go to parties and take nice vacations with their beaus. It's still not too late to go and have fun! Try booking yourself a nice trip with your close friends or family and just go wild (but legal)! 
Alot of my friends are about to get married or are looking into buying houses. I'm no way there yet since I still have alot of things I need to do before getting there. Just take things one at a time and go with it.
Happy birthday to you again!!
Alot of my friends are about to get married or are looking into buying houses. I'm no way there yet since I still have alot of things I need to do before getting there. Just take things one at a time and go with it.
Happy birthday to you again!!
Happy Birthday!
I've went thru something similar for the past three years at birthdays. Started at 26 once finishing grad school, then 27 and 28 were very similar.
I feel like I have such a wasted life. Which is crazy.
Maybe I just miss playing with Barbies and having no bills? Maybe going on a Barbie buying spree at Walmart would cure me? lol
Life is truly more than always working toward a future that you truly may never get a chance to live. You have to enjoy it everyday.
I personally feel like I wished my entire childhood away while planning for some mythical fabulous future. And I stand here, thinking "Is this it??"
I think you are very wise to only choose guys who are good potential mate choices. I say this because that is the way I lived also, and I couldn't give you advice to choose any differently from experience.
We all have our mental battles that we fight as we add years onto our lives. It is good that you think about these things now and maybe appreciate time as it passes instead of going thru this at age 50 and looking back on way too many wasted years. Maybe now you can learn to savor the moment a little more.
You will see that time will work your life out. I wish that for you soon! Things have a way of falling into place.
I agree with another poster that you are never too old to do fun and silly things! Enjoy life as it passes you by with no regrets!
I've went thru something similar for the past three years at birthdays. Started at 26 once finishing grad school, then 27 and 28 were very similar.
I feel like I have such a wasted life. Which is crazy.
Maybe I just miss playing with Barbies and having no bills? Maybe going on a Barbie buying spree at Walmart would cure me? lol
Life is truly more than always working toward a future that you truly may never get a chance to live. You have to enjoy it everyday.
I personally feel like I wished my entire childhood away while planning for some mythical fabulous future. And I stand here, thinking "Is this it??"
I think you are very wise to only choose guys who are good potential mate choices. I say this because that is the way I lived also, and I couldn't give you advice to choose any differently from experience.
We all have our mental battles that we fight as we add years onto our lives. It is good that you think about these things now and maybe appreciate time as it passes instead of going thru this at age 50 and looking back on way too many wasted years. Maybe now you can learn to savor the moment a little more.
You will see that time will work your life out. I wish that for you soon! Things have a way of falling into place.
I agree with another poster that you are never too old to do fun and silly things! Enjoy life as it passes you by with no regrets!
Just an update: Am feeling better now that my bday has passed but I think I still need to address the issue and hopefully HAVE MORE FUN or just accept I'm boring, lol!! 
Thanks to everyone who took the time to reply to my post it really meant a lot to me because it's difficult to seek and receive honest advice about a 'trivial issue' irl. There were some posts that literally put a smile on my face and I will be saving your replies to read over during my next wibble (I LOVE this word! ). Apologies for the LOOONG post I wanted to thank you all individually because I appreciated each one of you!
cherry pie: As I said before, everyone does things differently, I bet some of your friends are jealous of where you are in life and your freedom.
maro888: It's difficult because for so long people always tell us "you can have anything you want, reach for your goals". It's great we have a lot of options in life but like you I sometimes wish things could be clearer.
DRSM: Thanks for the bday smilies!! Your post sounds really encouraging and positive and upbeat!
Merika: You are sooo right. I think this is happening to me so I get the chance to make a difference early in life. I don't want to be 60 yo and buying a motorbike!
bagnshoofetish: You should be a motivational speaker! lol "Be your own best buddy." <-- I really like that advice.
ShimmaPuff: And you should write an advice column! Unfortunately I've already wandered too much from school so I don't think taking a year off is a viable solution. But in hindsight I should have done that after high school instead of hopping straight into uni. I recommending taking a year off to all kids now. You are right with everything you say, I am simply not having fun and I think my attitude is the major barrier. Definitely something to be worked on.
mrsjimmyh: I'm glad to know someone else feels that same. It's good you have your boyfriend to talk it over with. I tried telling friends but they just don't understand
seahorseinstrips: No it's not unbelievable that you got your boyfriend late. Sometimes relationships take a backburner to fulfilling careers. I'm not much of a life multitasker either! I'm into romance but only the idealized kind. Who wants to face up to reality lol! I think that's why I'm jealous of those kids, they're not subconsciously thinking of their futures everytime they find a new person!
potusss: I wish I'd broken those rules too!! Lol @ the chanel bag comment. I know you wonder what could have happened if you were with your hs sweetheart but whenever I get into the "what if" stage I always think to myself: What are some things I love now that would not have been possible if I HAD done that? If you were with your hs guy what would that have taken away from your present situation? Don't stress, life has a funny way of working out as everyone else has posted.
SonyaPhi: I'm not sure about the thowing up part, I think I'll maintain my dignity lol! But I think it's time I stop being so uptight. Not sure about the wild parties, I don't get invited to many of those! (We're more of a lunching group)
chloehandbags: "mature enough to know that some of those silly things are too risky to be attempted!" <-- lol, is that from experience?! I agree I'm still young, I should stop acting so old!
PinkSuadeSoho: Thanks I will have to take time out to appreciate what things I have done and improve from there. ITA, with health we can do anything and I must keep things in perspective.
Charles: It's true, according to the handwriting analysis page I do dwell in the past. lol, I'll gladly take a leaf out of your book and keep the fires of youth alight!
lara0112: I'm a sentimental fool and emotional to boot! Sometimes I believe I think too much. So much for those blonde foils I got - they're not doing their job! (no offense to any blondes!)
riffraff: Glad to hear we get over those silly insecurities. Hopefully I'll reach a time when I can accept myself and not get carried away with every "wibbly". With age comes wisdom and I'm sure it makes you happy to be able to laugh at silly posts like mine. ps: you are not old!
una: It's hard to balance life and work/school. That advice is easier said than done! Well done on understanding and liking your position in life!
Luv Classics: Your son sounds amazing, you must have done a great job raising him. A perfect example of things turning out right in the end. Life is too short to dwell on stuff like this but I think we still need times to reflect.
MAGs: Glad to meet someone who goes thru the same things. Maybe speak with DH, it's good to share thoughts so he can help you through.
pursehappygal: Thanks for the reassurance about growing up. I think it's pretty scary, carrying regrets doesn't help either!
handbag_luvr: Are you sure that's a light at the end of the tunnel? Lol, just kidding. Does that mean I have my midlife crisis to look forward to now?
Irissy: So true about the whole blur thing. I think it'll be a while until I can embrace any sort of wild side. But I have been told I look 18 so maybe I should start by flirting with some younger guys
mlowran: shopping does help, I'll tell you that! I really related to your post, the questions you asked in them are the same ones I ask myself. As gaining the skills to survive in this world is top priority (eg work) I think I have forgotten to smell the roses. I think I love shopping because it makes me forget about the insecurities I feel. "I personally feel like I wished my entire childhood away while planning for some mythical fabulous future. And I stand here, thinking "Is this it??" <-- This is sooo me as wellush:
Thanks guys, you all!
Thanks to everyone who took the time to reply to my post it really meant a lot to me because it's difficult to seek and receive honest advice about a 'trivial issue' irl. There were some posts that literally put a smile on my face and I will be saving your replies to read over during my next wibble (I LOVE this word! ). Apologies for the LOOONG post I wanted to thank you all individually because I appreciated each one of you! cherry pie: As I said before, everyone does things differently, I bet some of your friends are jealous of where you are in life and your freedom.
maro888: It's difficult because for so long people always tell us "you can have anything you want, reach for your goals". It's great we have a lot of options in life but like you I sometimes wish things could be clearer.
DRSM: Thanks for the bday smilies!! Your post sounds really encouraging and positive and upbeat!
Merika: You are sooo right. I think this is happening to me so I get the chance to make a difference early in life. I don't want to be 60 yo and buying a motorbike!
bagnshoofetish: You should be a motivational speaker! lol "Be your own best buddy." <-- I really like that advice.
ShimmaPuff: And you should write an advice column! Unfortunately I've already wandered too much from school so I don't think taking a year off is a viable solution. But in hindsight I should have done that after high school instead of hopping straight into uni. I recommending taking a year off to all kids now. You are right with everything you say, I am simply not having fun and I think my attitude is the major barrier. Definitely something to be worked on.
mrsjimmyh: I'm glad to know someone else feels that same. It's good you have your boyfriend to talk it over with. I tried telling friends but they just don't understand
seahorseinstrips: No it's not unbelievable that you got your boyfriend late. Sometimes relationships take a backburner to fulfilling careers. I'm not much of a life multitasker either! I'm into romance but only the idealized kind. Who wants to face up to reality lol! I think that's why I'm jealous of those kids, they're not subconsciously thinking of their futures everytime they find a new person!
potusss: I wish I'd broken those rules too!! Lol @ the chanel bag comment. I know you wonder what could have happened if you were with your hs sweetheart but whenever I get into the "what if" stage I always think to myself: What are some things I love now that would not have been possible if I HAD done that? If you were with your hs guy what would that have taken away from your present situation? Don't stress, life has a funny way of working out as everyone else has posted.
SonyaPhi: I'm not sure about the thowing up part, I think I'll maintain my dignity lol! But I think it's time I stop being so uptight. Not sure about the wild parties, I don't get invited to many of those! (We're more of a lunching group)
chloehandbags: "mature enough to know that some of those silly things are too risky to be attempted!" <-- lol, is that from experience?! I agree I'm still young, I should stop acting so old!
PinkSuadeSoho: Thanks I will have to take time out to appreciate what things I have done and improve from there. ITA, with health we can do anything and I must keep things in perspective.
Charles: It's true, according to the handwriting analysis page I do dwell in the past. lol, I'll gladly take a leaf out of your book and keep the fires of youth alight!
lara0112: I'm a sentimental fool and emotional to boot! Sometimes I believe I think too much. So much for those blonde foils I got - they're not doing their job! (no offense to any blondes!)
riffraff: Glad to hear we get over those silly insecurities. Hopefully I'll reach a time when I can accept myself and not get carried away with every "wibbly". With age comes wisdom and I'm sure it makes you happy to be able to laugh at silly posts like mine. ps: you are not old!
una: It's hard to balance life and work/school. That advice is easier said than done! Well done on understanding and liking your position in life!
Luv Classics: Your son sounds amazing, you must have done a great job raising him. A perfect example of things turning out right in the end. Life is too short to dwell on stuff like this but I think we still need times to reflect.
MAGs: Glad to meet someone who goes thru the same things. Maybe speak with DH, it's good to share thoughts so he can help you through.
pursehappygal: Thanks for the reassurance about growing up. I think it's pretty scary, carrying regrets doesn't help either!
handbag_luvr: Are you sure that's a light at the end of the tunnel? Lol, just kidding. Does that mean I have my midlife crisis to look forward to now?
Irissy: So true about the whole blur thing. I think it'll be a while until I can embrace any sort of wild side. But I have been told I look 18 so maybe I should start by flirting with some younger guys
mlowran: shopping does help, I'll tell you that! I really related to your post, the questions you asked in them are the same ones I ask myself. As gaining the skills to survive in this world is top priority (eg work) I think I have forgotten to smell the roses. I think I love shopping because it makes me forget about the insecurities I feel. "I personally feel like I wished my entire childhood away while planning for some mythical fabulous future. And I stand here, thinking "Is this it??" <-- This is sooo me as well
ush: Thanks guys,
you all!
!/4 life crisis...puts you in your twenties....there is so much time for so much fun!!! I turned 33 this year, and had a bit of a crisis about how fast the time was passing...but back to the fun...hook up with some friends for some girls' nights out!! Even the married ones...I am sure they could use a bit of fun! Try something new, that gets you out and about around new people!!
I just started a double-dutch jump rope team where we live...it's me and a bunch of 10 yrs. and under...it makes me feel young for about 1/2 a minute!!!!
I just started a double-dutch jump rope team where we live...it's me and a bunch of 10 yrs. and under...it makes me feel young for about 1/2 a minute!!!!
Happy happy birthday!!
When I turned 22 earlier this year, I had a slight crisis. I already have a great job lined up that I'll be starting this summer. But when I thought about it, it seems like I've planned everything in my life. I've gotten the grades, decided the major with the most post-grad options, etc. But when I look back at the past 4 years, I've been out only a handful of times, sometimes because I just felt like staying home and sometimes because I didn't have the energy to go out and party. So recently, I've been regretting the things that I didn't do and have been trying to play catch-up.
My friend and I plan to go out to a nice dinner once a month in the city. We also plan to explore some spots and just walk around and enjoy ourselves.
When you think about it, one thing just follows another in life and before you know it, so many years have passed by!
Just let loose a bit. Plan something fun once or twice a month. Or just do something spontaneous that you've been wanting to do!
When I turned 22 earlier this year, I had a slight crisis. I already have a great job lined up that I'll be starting this summer. But when I thought about it, it seems like I've planned everything in my life. I've gotten the grades, decided the major with the most post-grad options, etc. But when I look back at the past 4 years, I've been out only a handful of times, sometimes because I just felt like staying home and sometimes because I didn't have the energy to go out and party. So recently, I've been regretting the things that I didn't do and have been trying to play catch-up.
My friend and I plan to go out to a nice dinner once a month in the city. We also plan to explore some spots and just walk around and enjoy ourselves.
When you think about it, one thing just follows another in life and before you know it, so many years have passed by!
Just let loose a bit. Plan something fun once or twice a month. Or just do something spontaneous that you've been wanting to do!
Cheer up hun 
We always want what you can't have I'm sure thers heapsa peopel out there regretting wasting their uni life in parties and skipping school. You've worked hard to get where you are and I'm sure alot of people would be happy to be where u are I know alot of peopel that played when they are yougn they are still trying to finish their degrees while i've graduated and getting paid ^^. Its great and dusen't mean you have to be mature! You can still have losta fun! Find some fun friends to hand around and do something impulsive every so often ! Buying ah ouse doesn't mean you can be tied down in fact you probably have so much more freedom because you don't have to worry about when you'll get kicked out of ur rented place and have to find a new one! You can decorate your place however you want and not worry aobut having to move it in the next few months
Being surrounded by mature peopel can be suffocating but its also a benefit at least they can give you sound advice and you feel more fun compared to themm
nevertheless go out and meet some new people that may be younger!
Look on the bright side! Its ur birthday but you shouldn't cry even if you want to (man I'm so lame)
We always want what you can't have I'm sure thers heapsa peopel out there regretting wasting their uni life in parties and skipping school. You've worked hard to get where you are and I'm sure alot of people would be happy to be where u are I know alot of peopel that played when they are yougn they are still trying to finish their degrees while i've graduated and getting paid ^^. Its great and dusen't mean you have to be mature! You can still have losta fun! Find some fun friends to hand around and do something impulsive every so often ! Buying ah ouse doesn't mean you can be tied down in fact you probably have so much more freedom because you don't have to worry about when you'll get kicked out of ur rented place and have to find a new one! You can decorate your place however you want and not worry aobut having to move it in the next few months Being surrounded by mature peopel can be suffocating but its also a benefit at least they can give you sound advice and you feel more fun compared to themm
nevertheless go out and meet some new people that may be younger!Look on the bright side! Its ur birthday
but you shouldn't cry even if you want to (man I'm so lame)