How to give a wedding cash gift?

honeyspice

O.G.
Feb 19, 2009
762
5
Hi! I have a friend whom I've known since junior high and she is getting married. We used to be quite close but now we've kinda grown apart. Anyway. She did not register for gift registry and she hinted to me that she prefers cash for wedding gift. (She asked me if it's rude if she doesn't get wedding gift registry, so I understand that must be a hint)

Here's my question, how should I give her a cash gift? Should I write her a cheque, and send it to her house? Or should I give it to her on her wedding day? I don't want to send money through mail. I've also read stories about cards with cash getting lost at wedding reception and then the bride thinks the guests did not get them a gift, etc. etc., I really want to avoid that happening. :s

My second question is, she is holding her wedding at 3pm and then reception to follow at a golf club. My sister suggests giving around $120 cdn pp., is that a good amount as cash gift? For reference, we are both 25 yrs old and we are not loaded. hehe :P I am also attending her bridal shower.

Thanks for any input! :smile:
 
I like the idea of a check in a card. You could either send it beforehand or bring it to the reception and place it on the gift table with everything else.

(I think 120 is a good amount.)
 
You know, a close friend of mine had a similar situation...they ended up doing a "money-tree" concept where they had a frame (made of wire) that was shaped like a tree...and you slipped your envelope in the "branch"...it was a cute idea...

Anyway, the amount you mentioned and that giving it the day of the wedding is the best choice...IMO
 
$120 per person is very generous....

A personal check is definitely the best way to make sure your gift was received. Placed in a card and given at the reception is appropriate, but mailing it would be fine as well.

Lots of people have card holders at the reception, shaped like wishing wells or mail boxes, and decorated for the occasion...

My wedding had a Disney theme, and I built a house out of foam core that I decorated with lace and little fake flowers and Mickey shaped windows, and I had a little ceramic Mickey and Minnie outside the front door. The hole to drop the cards in was in the center of the roof, and I plugged in a small nightlight in the back of the house so it lit up through the windows.... It was really lovely.
 
I'm South Asian and it's pretty much the norm to only give cash at weddings. The cash/ cheque goes in a card and is given at the reception (there's usually a box or table near the guest book)
:smile:
 
Yes, that is the way we do in the wedding. I am from Asia. Cash goes in to a red envelop. People write their name and their wishes on the envelop. So you will know which envelop from which relatives, or friends of yours.

the amount of money you give totally depends on how close you guys are.

Here are the envelops: just for fun.
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give what you feel comfortable giving. to me $120 is a lot of money to give to someone unless they are my very best friend, and i'm around the same age as you. for people who i grew apart from, but still communicate with once in awhile... the most i give is $50. but if you can give that much, that is awesome and i hope your friend really appreciates it.
 
If you are worried about giving/sending cash, you could always get a prepaid Visa or AmEx gift card. And the Visa giftcard gets stolen or lost, you can get the money back by providing the card #, so it's pretty safe!
 
You know, a close friend of mine had a similar situation...they ended up doing a "money-tree" concept where they had a frame (made of wire) that was shaped like a tree...and you slipped your envelope in the "branch"...it was a cute idea...

Anyway, the amount you mentioned and that giving it the day of the wedding is the best choice...IMO

Yeah, I've been to 'money tree' weddings. Also, my niece is getting married in January and on their gifts table at the reception they are putting out a decorated mailbox .... flowers and tulle all over it...it's intended for cards only .... I thought that was a cute idea.

But if your friend wants $$ then I say it saves you the time of shopping and she's getting what she wants. A check in a card should be just fine.
 
I would say a check or cash in a card... I've never done this (I buy from the registry), and I know couples who have card boxes at the weddings, but my dad doesn't feel comfortable putting the envelope in the card box, so when he is greeting the bride and groom he discreetly hands them a slim envelope - the whole exchange is a bit mafia style - my dad's awesome.

If I were to give cash or check - which I plan to do when I am older/married/earn more money, I plan give enough money to cover the plates of my party, then a little extra to round it out. For example, if I was going with my date, and I learned plates were about $80 a person, both plates are $160, I would aim for $200.
 
I don't think you can do anything wrong with a cheque and a nice card which you give on the wedding date. You could also get a nice piggy bank and put the cash/cheque in there, this might look nicer on the gift table.

I usually chose how to give a cash gift depending on how "black tie & formal" the whole event is. The less formal the more creative your packaging can be IMHO.

Here in Germany we sometimes say "to fry mice" (Mäuse verbraten) for "spending money". :shame: So for the last wedding I went to me and the BF put the cash in a frying pan with lots of white sugar mice (hope you know what I mean) plus a mousetrap with some cheese to attract more mice in the future.