How old to appreciate an heirloom piece?

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BittyMonkey

BittyMonkey

O.G.
Mar 10, 2007
6,392
5,661
#1
My niece is turning 4. She is a very little thing and extremely girly -- loves pink, sparkles, unicorns, etc. She even picks out her own clothes and shoes and knows her shoe types. She actually once asked me where my "sandals" are -- at three years old -- and they were indeed sandals. :nuts:

I am not going to have any children of my own and this is my brother's daughter. She is also the only grandchild that three sides of the family has, so she is absolutely swamped in gifts for every holiday. It's kind of ridiculous. But these gifts are mostly clothes, fairy/princess stuff, and books.

Anyway, I have a couple of Tiffany necklaces I bought for myself that I wouldn't mind giving to her as a gift. To me these are very small, inexpensive pieces that I don't really want to bother with eBay for. And I know that the jewelry I love the most are the heirloom pieces or the ones with personal meaning -- I always wear the locket my husband gave me on our wedding day when I travel, and I have my grandmother's charm bracelets.

One of my favorite memories is my grandmother buying me a pin on bird with "a diamond" (it wasn't real gold and it wasn't a real diamond but it was soooo pretty to me). I considered it my first real piece of "jewelry" but for the life of me I don't know how old I was. Maybe 7ish?

So I would like to give her something but I don't know when a proper age would be. She is not going to break it, that I know. But would she appreciate it?

Can anyone give me some advice? I was maybe thinking her 5th birthday (next year?) Or should I do it when I go visit them in February for her 4th?
 
#3
I have a 6 year old who really, really LOVES jewelry. But she can literally have something one minute and have "lost" it the next. She simply isn't responsible enough to have anything of value that she can remove on her own, so we stick with costume jewelry for now. I do have some nicer pieces for her, but they are tucked safely away and she wears them for special occasions and will be allowed custody of them when she is reponsible enough not to lose them.
 
#4
Crystalina said:
Wow, I think 4 is REALLY young for heirloom jewelry.

In my opinion, I would wait until the child is 12, or in 6th grade.
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Well, in all fairness it's not really worth all that much. More of the sentiment.

I think I'm a little worried she would be on to better, more expensive things (my brother's family lives and works in NYC) by that age...and I'm not really planning on giving her my more blingy things.
 
#5
HauteMama said:
I have a 6 year old who really, really LOVES jewelry. But she can literally have something one minute and have "lost" it the next. She simply isn't responsible enough to have anything of value that she can remove on her own, so we stick with costume jewelry for now. I do have some nicer pieces for her, but they are tucked safely away and she wears them for special occasions and will be allowed custody of them when she is reponsible enough not to lose them.
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Yes, makes sense. Thanks.
 
#6
Hmmm....

I guess I chose age 12 b/c I'm a teacher and have taught K-12, and just knowing the way kids treat things makes me worry about you giving a nice piece to her so young.

Like the other poster said, kids lose things all the time. And they tend to twist and pull and play with just about anything, which makes me think your nice gift to her could end up in a million pieces!

When think back over my students, I think most 6th grade girls would be old enough to appreciate a nice heirloom piece and take care of it. Just my opinion.
 
#7
My 17 year old also is not responsible and i doubt they really know the meaning of heirloom in the real sense .
maybe give it to her when she is older or keep this in your will for her.she definitely will appreciate it more .
 
#8
My MIL gave my son a really nice 14k yg cross necklace when he was born and he's 6 now. I keep it in my jewelry box and when he wants to wear it I give it to him and then when he's done I put it back in my jewelry box. My point is you can give it to her at any age and her parents can always keep it safe when she's not wearing it. Some kids are a lot more responsible with their stuff, there are three and four year olds that keep their stuff nice and put away and there are teenagers that don't take care of anything, so it's really up to the kid and of course it's up to you. I think it's really nice of you to do that for her!
 
#9
I was about 6 or 7 when my grandparents and parents started to buy me jewelry. I'm sure that I lost my fair share of it, but I truly don't ever remember loosing anything. I still have some of it, and it's in a jewelry box that my grandfather bought for me a few years ago. I doubt most of it is real stones/gold, but I'm almost positive that some of it is. I guess what I'm getting at is that not all kids will loose items or ruin them. It absolutely depends on the child and how responsible they are. If they're the type to loose items, giving them something important won't change that, kwim? I think that if you want to give her the items then 4 is a little young, I'd probably wait until at least she goes to kindergarten, but that's just me. Also, I'd buy her a small jewelry box for her to put her items in. I think that when kids don't have a specific place to put things, then they get lost. I've had various jewelry boxes for as long as I can remember, and it always helped me to keep track of things. It doesn't have to be fancy (probably best if it's not, I put stickers on my first one lol) just something that's big enough that it will be harder to misplace. I think that when she eventually gets the items that she will love them & regardless of if they're expensive or not, she will appreciate them for their sentimental value. :smile1:
 
#10
8 or 9 is old enought to wear "heirlooms" you don't care getting lost, 12 for nicer pieces, and about 14 or 15 it's okay to drop a few thousand at a time if you care to.

No child at 3, 4, or 5 will appreciate jewelry. If you decide to gift the necklace for a birthday throw in a toy as well for something she will actually enjoy.
 
#12
HauteMama said:
I have a 6 year old who really, really LOVES jewelry. But she can literally have something one minute and have "lost" it the next. She simply isn't responsible enough to have anything of value that she can remove on her own, so we stick with costume jewelry for now. I do have some nicer pieces for her, but they are tucked safely away and she wears them for special occasions and will be allowed custody of them when she is reponsible enough not to lose them.
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This is what I do as well. DD has a few heirloom pieces that are safely stored for special occasions only. I have given my niece (12) a diamond solitaire that belonged to my grandmother but she doesn't wear it regularly. She knows that it has great sentimental value and only wears it for special family occassions as a pendant.

I think it is fine to give heirlooms to children as long as they are taught to appreciate the value. They don't have to wear the heirlooms daily.
 
#13
i love this idea and i think it's absolutely wonderful of you to want to pass your pieces down to her.

i think 12 might be a little too old to give to her, but maybe 8 or 9? at that age, she'll be old enough to know what it means to have something as special as this passed down to her. i only say this because my daughter recently received my mother's diamond stud earrings and a pair of amethyst earrings when she was 9. but, it's up to me to make sure that she doesn't wear them everyday and takes care of them. i won't let her wear either pair to school, especially considering how active she is, and the only time i did is to let her wear the diamond studs for her class pictures. that was it.

otherwise, i am saving them for her for when she gets a little older and i know she'll take care of them.

just make sure you make it very clear to your brother and your SIL to hold onto them and give them to her when she's at an appropriate age to wear them and appreciate them.
 
#14
I used to get earrings when I was little and I pretty much always lost them until at least 12 or so, even though I was a very mature and obsessive child. I don't think she will grow out of them, I have plenty of simple tiffany pieces and I'm in my mid twenties.

Like you, I had some pieces I had grown out of, I gave one to a cousin for her high school graduation, but I think anytime after 14 or so I would have seen no problem with it.
 
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