How much he makes versus how much you make

IntlSet

IntlSet

Bonjour!
Jan 29, 2006
12,369
63
#1
I'm so nosy! :yes:

I guess I just find it helpful to compare the way I do things with the way other people do things in their relationships... I think there's always something to learn or something I haven't thought of.

I'm curious for the unmarried ladies the difference in income between you and your significant other. Is it a lot? A little? No numbers necessary if you don't feel comfortable. How does that affect the things you do together (dates, vacations, gift-giving)? Does he end up shouldering a majority of the cost (and is this a function of a bigger paycheck or of traditional values or both)?

Sorry, I hope you guys don't think this is a stupid question. It's a little tacky which is why it's probably better I ask it here than to anyone in person. :shame:
 
#2
:shame: i make more than my bf... he's still doing his apprenticeship... he's finishing up soon... but when we go out to dinner, movies, holidays etc... we just pay our own way due to the fact that i'm still not comfortable with him paying for everything! When we first started dating/going out 5 years ago he always use to pay for things but i think its better now - i dont feel so guilty. :smile:
 
#3
He makes like 20% more than me. but i tell myself im two years younger. And when im his age I can make that much too.:graucho:. He pays more than I do, I offer to pay when I can (as long as i can get that purse of the week J/K:shame:smile:. Funny you asked this cause my bf and I just had a discussion about married couples and whether or not separate bank accounts are a plus or negative to a marriage.
 
#4
I made a significant amount less (corporate job---waitress) than my BF, but we had separate accounts and I always paid my share of rent, bills, etc. except for the majority of groceries and eating out. Money is the biggest thing we fought about (mainly him telling me how I should spend what little amount I had left after paying my share of bills), and it's the reason why we are not together anymore. He never ever took me shopping. Not even for my birthday.
 
#5
i make just abt the same as my bf but he has a bunch of bills and mortgages from his "previous" life so i end up paying for a lot of the day to day stuff.. which i'm fine with... (vacations we split) it'd be nice if he "spoiled" me a little but hey i have a job.. i can buy my own lv :rochard:

but i must say... next time round.. i'm going to make sure he is rich and old... lol...

what's yr situation intlset?
 
#6
My husband makes a lot more than me, but I've been a stay-at-home mom for 15 years now. For about 12 years, though, I've been working home jobs that allow me to make at least some money, but still be around for my kids.
 
#7
I make $10,000 more than my better half however I we are in the same industry and he has 10 years less experience than I. Tell me that doesn't bite sometimes!

He does however, spoil me rotten :smile:
 
#8
When we were dating and living together (14 years ago), I made twice what he did. He was an assistant professor at an Ivy League university and I was a software developer. I probably spent twice as much as he did and maintained our cars in NYC, so we were equally broke.

He wouldn't marry me until he made more money than me and thought he could support a family. However, the moment he went into industry and made 125% of what I made, he proposed. When I left my job as a software project leader five years ago, he was making three times what I made.

The problem now is that when I work, I get taxed at his marginal tax rate, both state and federal. So more than 50% of my paychecks need to get earmarked for taxes. And I have a hard time dealing with that.

Anyway, whether we were single or married, whoever had money paid for whatever was needed. He never tallied things up to see who had contributed what, and I doubt I did it more than once, and that was just for my own purposes. Our only differences about money have been on how much to spend on a house.
 
#9
My bf makes a LOT more than I do. I am about to graduate from college (I do have a couple of part-time jobs but they don't pay much) and he's been out of school for over 2 years now working full-time.

We don't live together, so when we go out, he pays for everything. He doesn't even want to hear my offers to pay anymore. He just goes ahead and does it. When we go away on vacation, I pay for some stuff and he, again, pays for most of it. I do feel guilty but there is no way I could afford to pay for both of us or even my own half. So, I am lucky to have him...:smile:.

He does have a tendency to tell me how to spend my own money. So, all those bags that I have? He hasn't seen half of them. I do understand why he does that...because he pays for almost everything when we're together but then I get very defensive because I buy those bags with my own money. So, according to him, if we get married, we are going to have separate banking account, which I am not thrilled about...:sad:(
 
#10
i make almost 2x more than my bf, but he saves more than me. he's still living at home, only pays for groceries and $300/month for rent...i have rent, car payments, utilities, shopping habit...he actually has a lot more saved up than i do - he's very very good at saving.
 
#11
I don't have a job. My bf pays for everything. When we go out, when we go on vacation etc . I do pay once in a blue when he forgets his wallet in the car and I tell him "NO I GOT THIS" but he is very against me paying.

My parents support most of my shopping and bags but my bf buys me lots of presents. When we go shopping he buys me stuff and I am very against it. He also gets me very nice presents for my birthday anniversary valentines day. I got alexander mcqueen lace slingbacks, a chloe paddington and a jay strongwater trinket tray.

He also supports my shopping habbits and when I tell him I feel bad asking my parents for money for something he offers the money and I REFUSE. I feel bad asking my parents and my bf for supporting me.

The problem is that I am in college and my bf is 7 years older than I am. My parents and him are against me working and they want me to focus on school.
 
#14
I earn more than my boyfriend because I'm working and he isn't yet. We are in the same field so when he does come out of school, I'll probably be making more than him for a couple of years as a senior consultant, unless the industry picks up all of a sudden and recent graduates get golden bridges again...
 
#15
The way I look at it, my boyfriend and I probably make about the same. Technically, he makes more than I do, but he pays rent for an apartment, and a loan on a brand new vehicle.

I own my house (no rent, no mortgage), and my car payment is less than half of what he pays. His heating bill for his apartment is twice as much as mine for my house. Even his bill for his TV is twice as much as mine.

So in the end, I'd say that we make about the same.
 
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