How do you pack up and leave gracefully from your workplace?

Bee...Bee

Bee...Bee

Dizziness to myself
Mar 16, 2006
729
4
#1
The story goes: this weekend is the last weekend of January and today at 5.30pm GMT (which is in 15 minutes time as I type this whilst waiting and everyone is staying absolutely silent, LOL), we will be asked to go and see the director(s) one by one and you will be handed a brown envelope with a number written on white piece of paper in it. The number represents the bonus that you get for your effort that you have made for the past year.

I am not worried about the number because everyone has ensured that they locked in the number they want before the end of last year but after 8 years at the same firm, I am following the investment banking tradition of switching straight after the bonuses and packing up will have to be done on Monday morning together along with tendering my resignation.

I am leaving not because of any bad feelings but I want to have a child ASAP so I am getting an 'alternative investment' ;) fund that is more tolerant of a woman with a bump on her tummy, LOL. But I am actually really worried how my soon-to-be-former colleagues will handle it when they know I am jumping ship; I have heard some stories and let’s say there is no love lost between two former friends when one was leaving.

So I want to know how to handle Monday morning – what to say when you get called in to be persuaded to stay, to explain oneself to certain people including potentially your biggest boss – because this has the potential to flare up if I choose the wrong wording and despite the fact that I have given my director a private notice well in advance and he had kind enough to allow me to have the bonus just like other continuing colleagues, I can tell other directors who I don’t report to and some colleagues will have a knee-jerk reaction and may say some things when I pack up come Monday!
 
#2
Wow I wouldn't worry about that in the least. I work in the Financial Services world now but have worked in a few different areas (aerospace, retail, housing) and it's the same across the board. You wait for your bonus. I think they'd look upon you oddly if you hadn't of waited for it to be paid.
You have a completely legitimate reason to move on. You've been with the firm a substatial amount of time. I really think you're in the right and won't be looked upon by your collegues poorly at all. If they do they are not being honest with themselves because they'd do the exact same thing.
Not paying annual bonuses at the end of the year (besides the logistical issue of not knowing specifically how the company did and how much they would want to pay out) is a retention technique and if it keeps you there till the end of January then that's what it did.
Be assertive with your announcement and thankful for your time and what you've learned and were able to bring to the table. Pack your stuff with your head held high.
Good luck!
 
#3
Be firm and professional I say. Don't worry about how others will "take" it. That is their burden to bear. Be honest, articulate and offer praise and gratitude to your employer - leaving with class is what everyone will remember. This is your life and you do whats right respectfully. If coworkers have a problem with it - they need to grow up. Change is part of life. Offer to stay in touch but don't get hurt if people fail to. Sometimes work is the only common denominator binding friendships together. The strong ones will survive and this will weed out the ones that were not solid in the first place.
Good luck! Its exciting to start a new path.
 
#4
Are you giving appropriate notice (2 weeks?). If they don't have any warning, I wouldn't expect people to handle it too well because it makes more work for everyone else.

I would say be polite, thank the bosses for giving you the opportunity to work there in the first place, and tell everyone you wish them the best in the future.
 
#5
Bee Bee, Good luck! You have very good and sound advice above! All I have to include is to be nice! You never know when you will see those people again and it is good be kindly remembered. How about bringing them some donuts Monday morning? :rolleyes: J/K!!!

My BF told me to "not burn any bridges" when I left my job in science. He's in the sports entertainment business and has moved around a lot, but I'm amazed at all the people he knows.

Congratulations on moving on and planning for a family! You gave the company many years, and now you need and deserve the opportunity to focus more on what is best for you. Let us know how it goes!
 
#6
Just say you appreciate all that they have done for you. You enjoyed your time with them & are sad to be leaving.
Do not burn bridges! You never know what wil happen in the future & everyone remembers someone who's gracious. The donuts would be a nice touch & aren't expensive.
 
#7
jillybean307 said:
Are you giving appropriate notice (2 weeks?). If they don't have any warning, I wouldn't expect people to handle it too well because it makes more work for everyone else.

I would say be polite, thank the bosses for giving you the opportunity to work there in the first place, and tell everyone you wish them the best in the future.
Click to expand...

Many employers will not allow someone to stay after notice. They can do damage or be lazy for 2 weeks.
 
#8
Vegas Long Legs said:
Just say you appreciate all that they have done for you. You enjoyed your time with them & are sad to be leaving.
Do not burn bridges! You never know what wil happen in the future & everyone remembers someone who's gracious.
Click to expand...

I agree with Vegas.

My addition: it is no one's business but yours why you are leaving. If you are pushed for an explanation say that you are making a move that is good for you and keeping the details private for now. Period.

I would also cash my bonus check and make certain it cleared before announcing my departure date.
 
#9
Just got back from the office right now actually and let the 'boys' go to the strip club. It seems that everyone is happy with their desired number of zeros on the piece of paper, LOL so they will probably don't care too much when I break the news on Monday.

Now the problem lies in the justification I have to give in front of 6 directors ganging up on me AT ONCE (that is the bad thing being a proprietary trader because they insist that you have to give a very good reason since there are lots of poaching going on and there was one person who had a legal case against him with another firm after they found out he has double-crossed them).

I don't think doughnuts are going to appease them, LOL so how do you ladies think I should phrase my excuse because I can tell the reason for wanting a child will not go down too well with these bankers and they are going to scream sexist remarks at me (I had to take everyday so it's OK) but as every lady pointed out I may need to speak to some of these people afterwards because the 'alternative investment' fund that I will be working in is the 'buy-side' and investment banks are regarded as the 'sell-side' so naturally both sides may come into contact.

How would you rate my excuse that I have lost the motivation and I would be a burden to firm (no talking about family or social life because that will also get me something like: 'God these bimbos, all they want is to be a trophy wife and this is one of the less offensive ones!) or shall I just take the sexist remarks that I'll get when I say I want a child and get it over and done with, LOL.
 
#10
I don't think "I've lost the motivation" is a good idea, especially if you will be coming into contact with these people in the future.

Why not thank them for the opportunity they have given you and that you have enjoyed your time working for them. Explain that you have reached a point in your life where you are interested in a position with more flexibility and time off. Or tell them that it's time for a change and you want to try the other side of the biz. It's not their business why. If they ask you, I don't see anything wrong with saying that you want to start a family. After eight years of working hard for them, you have certainly earned the right to want a change in your life.

Maybe you will be pleasantly surprised and they will offer to work something out with you (if that's what you want).

As for the two weeks, I would give them the professional notice, and let them decide if they want you to stay for it. If they need to escort you to the door after you resign, at least you've done the right thing. Good luck!
 
#11
I agree with shopping junkie. Omit the 'lost motivation' excuse and focus on the desire for more flexibility or additional experience on the 'other side' to achieve certain career goals. Assure them that you will always be loyal to them and will never do anything to harm the company. Will you have a termination contract? My boyfriend had a very long and detailed one he and his attorney and the company approved, but those can be tedious.

They should not give you grief about you wanting to start a family...because I'm assuming they did! They may be upset at the fact that a long-time, loyal and hard-working employee will be leaving. Replacing you and training someone else will probably be a pain and not easy. But they will get over it! Just offer to be (occasionally) available if they have any questions.
 
#12
Bee...Bee said:
Just got back from the office right now actually and let the 'boys' go to the strip club. It seems that everyone is happy with their desired number of zeros on the piece of paper, LOL so they will probably don't care too much when I break the news on Monday.

Now the problem lies in the justification I have to give in front of 6 directors ganging up on me AT ONCE (that is the bad thing being a proprietary trader because they insist that you have to give a very good reason since there are lots of poaching going on and there was one person who had a legal case against him with another firm after they found out he has double-crossed them).

I don't think doughnuts are going to appease them, LOL so how do you ladies think I should phrase my excuse because I can tell the reason for wanting a child will not go down too well with these bankers and they are going to scream sexist remarks at me (I had to take everyday so it's OK) but as every lady pointed out I may need to speak to some of these people afterwards because the 'alternative investment' fund that I will be working in is the 'buy-side' and investment banks are regarded as the 'sell-side' so naturally both sides may come into contact.

How would you rate my excuse that I have lost the motivation and I would be a burden to firm (no talking about family or social life because that will also get me something like: 'God these bimbos, all they want is to be a trophy wife and this is one of the less offensive ones!) or shall I just take the sexist remarks that I'll get when I say I want a child and get it over and done with, LOL.
Click to expand...

Well, you are too smart to be a "trophy wife"! (WTH - everytime I hear that word I think 1968!) As my DH said, "why settle for beauty only when you can marry beauty & brains."
Don't you have laws against the kind of behavior it sounds like you are going to be put through. Sounds totally inappropriate!
If you didn't sign a noncompete they have no case against you. Of course doesn't mean they can't find some slime bag attorney to try.
I think your "lost the motivation & burden to the firm" is excellent. It take the wind out of their sails. If you stick to this, not much they can say. I know sometimes when your getting grilled, there are periods of time when nothing is said. They are mind f-ing you. No matter how uncomfortable it becomes, don't say anything. When this used to happen to me, I'd sit there & think OK this is one of those times like being in sales, the first person that speaks loses!
 
#14
i am not a part of this kind of organization and don't know what the expected behavior is but i know what i would do.

just simply state the truthful reason you are leaving and if you are grilled or demeaned reply that your mind is made up and you have given them the honest reasons for your departure and no amount of mind games is going to change that. tell them you wish them well and don't need to take up any more of their time.
 
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