and both have a family? I am thinking about this for a while bec my sibling and I are gradually drifting apart. I know it is natural and I tried to work against it but in the past year so many things have happened (i came back after 10 years being abroad so there are more 'touching' points. we may have been like this for a long time) that I have distanced myself quite deliberately and abruptly. too much to get into but the basic point is that there is the expectation that everything they do is great and want to be supported, but if others do it differently they just can't be supportive. by no means am I that impressed about how they handle their life as I would never do it that way, but so far my attitude has been: if it makes you, I am happy. I haven't found this in return so I am changing/ have changed although I hate to go against my character. also, until now I have considered my parent's hopes as I love them to bits. (I should say we both have married and have kids). so, I wrote a long letter - not accusing but at least explaining the change in my behaviour. that way I can never be 'blamed' for not discussing. I haven't sent it yet - have to change the 1. draft anyway. what would you do? what did you do? does it even matter to get along? I just don't know. I mean ok we used to get along great but is it important later on? I am so lost on this one for such a long time....(too many stories, right to making fun of things that are quite important to hubby, kids and me).