How do you ask for an upgrade for those that were sucessful?

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  1. My husband and I have been married for 8 years and got engaged very young and had a house. My diamond is a 1.03 carat and before we got engaged I always told him I wanted a 2 carat. Obviously with other commitments and being young and starting work it's hard to spend such a large amount on a ring. On top we paid for our whole wedding.

    I have mentioned to my husband and I feel I have offended him by asking for a 2 carat or more. Obviously cost of diamonds are more and we also have more expenses now with kids.

    I guess my question is how do you ladies approach the subject without being so rude to say I want an upgrade because the one you got me wasn't quite big enough?

    My husband is a very romantic kind of guy so I probably could see one coming and don't know it. Just last month he surprised me with a YG love which was out of the ordinary.

    How do you ladies do it? How do you convince your DH we need an upgrade!
     
  2. Honestly, I didn't. I did all my research and found a good deal and told him to transfer the money after I bought it. Though, he never would have bought it for me on his own. I told him when we got engaged 15 years ago. He never took me seriously. Oh well. I was serious. ;)
     
  3. It was an easy conversation. I just told him that I really wanted a bigger diamond and that I wanted to start setting aside money toward that purpose. He knows I like larger pieces of jewelry in general, so talking to him about it was no big deal. His only request was that we keep my original engagement ring for sentimental reasons.
     
  4. +1
    This is what I plan to do with my upgrade too!
     
  5. DH actually suggested it... not sure how'd I'd go about asking.
    I guess I'd probably start dropping hints by pointing them out in windows, on my friend's hands, etc...
     
  6. Honestly I just first casually mentioned to him that I was thinking of getting a bigger center diamond. He did seem a bit hurt at first but I assured him my ring would stay the same, just the center diamond would be bigger and that no one would really notice but me. I went to the jeweler myself and priced everything out, picked out the diamond, got 12 months free financing, etc., so there was really no good reason for him to say no LOL. I think it helps to do your homework first, lay out your entire plan, and then offer it to him logically, without getting emotional or frustrated. Good luck!
     
  7. I wouldn't know how to bring it up either, I guess you can give him hint or just show him the ring that you've always wanted.
     
  8. Thanks ladies. My husband is not the type where he would just buy even with research. I will drop hints and maybe hope for the best. I told him I was going to still keep the ring for sentimental reasons so maybe ask for my push present that I never got? 😉
     
  9. Like you I told DH I wanted an upgrade from the beginning. I didnt want him to spent too much $ on the ring when we got married because we had other expenses. So I was under the budget that he gave me for our original ering. But I told him that I would like an upgrade in the future. So when I gave birth to our daughter and he said that the would like to get me a present, I said how about that upgrade then :smile:
     
  10. I think you've got a chance if he bought you a Love without even asking?! Wow!
     
  11. It took me a few years of hinting before I actually got it. I would say how I would love a big diamond, and he would say my diamond was beautiful and who cared how big it was. When we had a big anniversary coming up, I just told him that I would love to upgrade my diamond, and that I wasn't emotionally attached to an object, it was a piece of jewelry and in no way did it have anything to do with our relationship. After I said it like that he was much more receptive. I traded in my original diamond to try to make the sticker shock a little bit easier, but in retrospect I wish I had kept it and put it into a pendant. Good luck!
     
  12. The ring I hinted to my husband was the embrace and to be honest it's a huge upgrade from mine currently if there's a bezel. Our 10 year is in 2 years so hopefully I can score one by then or maybe hint hard enough for my birthday next month?!
     
  13. i've already suggested it way in advance, i've said i've other jewelery in my sights first but i will one day if i can upgrade to a tiffany diamond ring
    i havent got my heart set on any particular one yet so it seems silly to put in so much money when im undecided atm
    i dont understand why you cant just ask
    if i want something i ask or you just never know
    i would keep my original e-ring for sentimental reasons
    theres no offence in asking to buy a bigger diamond, the main thing is you being happy right? and if it makes you feel happy even for a moment im sure your OH wont mind especially if its what you really want so much :smile:
    i think we create more worry than needs be sometimes, i used to
    it sounds like your OH likes spending on you and seeing you happy like mine so i'm sure he'd be the same
    infact he'd probably feel quite proud of himself for acheiving the upgrade for you :smile:
     
  14. I don't mean to be rude, but why would you want an upgrade when you already have such a large stone? I am not surprised your husband was offended, to be honest. It is one thing buying you a beautiful gift like a Love bracelet as a surprise (what a lovely husband) and another to be asked for a larger stone to replace something he gave you from his heart when he asked you to marry him and is already a large size by anyone's standards. It makes you seem shallow.

    I just mentioned this scenario to my husband to see what he said and his mouth dropped open. Maybe it is a cultural difference as we live in the UK where people seem to place less emphasis on large diamonds but, to me, it is not even about the size but the fact that your husband chose it for you and it symbolises the love and commitment he felt/feels for you.

    I don't want to offend you but this is just my opinion. Your husband sounds like a real treasure and already very generous to buy you a Cartier Love without even being asked.

    If you are really intent on getting a larger ring I would just leave it as you have mentioned it to your husband and planted the seed - it sounds like he will just get more annoyed if you bring the subject up again, given his initial reaction.
     
  15. I guess that makes me shallow as I upgraded from a 1.25 to a 2.10. But I suppose that's par for the course on a website where the tagline is "Shallow obsessing strongly encouraged." :shrugs: