How did you know you were ready to be a mom?

  1. What factors influenced your decision to become a mom? How did you know you were prepared? Did you have a gut feeling? I'm sure some of you have nieces, nephews, and kids of friends whom you played with before having your own. Was that a big influence? For those who were pleasantly surprised to find out you were pregnant, what made you sure you could handle it since it's a responsibility you'll have for the rest of your life?
  2. Hmmm....I'd always wanted to be a mom, I suppose, on some subconscious level. DH and I waited to start on having a family as we thought that we'd get our careers off the ground, save enough to purchase a house, etc., etc. Once we felt that we were ready I was almost 35 y.o. and it took us nearly 1-1/2 years to get pregnant. Did the IVF route, but that didn't work. Got spontaneously pregnant with my b/g twins about a month later while on holiday in the Cayman Islands -- totally blotto most of the time! :graucho:

    NOTHING prepared me for the reality of motherhood. In the first place, I think that having a baby throws you in for a loop; I ended up with two and was lucky to get more than 1-1/2 hours of sleep on any given night for the first 6 months. My pregancy went very well, and I carried my guys for 38-1/2 weeks. I know...OUCH!

    DH and I tried again to have more children within the last 3 years without success. We decided a year ago to stop trying and enjoy our kids who are now 5-years old. I now live vicariously through girlfriends with newborns and toddlers.
  3. I've always wanted to be a mother...

    We got pregnant on accident, but I wouldn't give up my girl for the world. I was very scared and nervous throughout my pregnancy that I would be a bad mom, but it's all worked out fine :smile: I don't think you can ever really be ready - there will always be situations that would make things difficult...
  4. Didn't really think about it. It was sort of planned so I would have the baby right after I finished college, and would fit into 'the scheme of things' We were already married for 5 years anyway, and the parents were muttering about grandchildren, the hubby was in almost permanent, pensionable government employment.
  5. always wanted to be a mom but when it came to planning I got scared... haha. glad it just happened by accident in the end, so that was taken care. btw, in all honesty, the time is always right. I dont think it will ever NOt fit, or if you like 'fit' into the big scheme of things and once you have gone through a significant development (like gotten your education etc) at least there is something substantial there for your living. I doubt there really is a moment where you just KNOW you want to be a mum, given that we don't know beforehand what is like to be one. it is a huge commitment so naturally it isn't easy beforehand. once the child is there, IMO, it sorts itself out (except the mother has major issues) and for me it is the best ever. good luck!
  6. I am the opposite. I am 38 and have been with my DH for 20 years and I have never felt "ready". I have never had the mother instinct/desire.
  7. I wanted to be a mommy since I was a little girl. I've always loved kids. Due to life circumstances I didn't have my first child until 33. Although it was something that I had always planned for and, I was older and pretty settled in life, having my little girl really threw me. All the planning in the world doesn't prepare you for motherhood. And I am not just talking about the physical aspects or economical aspects but the emotional ones as well. The last two years of pregnancy and raising my daughter have been some of the happiest and toughest times of my life. She has changed me forever and I am so glad that she's in my life. Although I would not go back and change ANYTHING, there of course are times when I yearn for peace, quiet, rest, and ZERO responsilities.

    Best of luck to you!!!
  8. I'm with you, beljwl... I truly hope that one day I will wake up and realize this is something I want, but I just don't know... I'm 35 and really think I would have felt something by now. I have a one year old niece that I love with all my heart, but I'm very happy to play with her and hold her, and then leave her with her Mommy to feed her, change her, soothe her, etc... I wish I was more strong-willed b/c I feel like everyone around me must wonder what is wrong with me, and that really upsets me...
  9. sounds like me. I'm 35 and having a child is something I would not even think to consider. It just doens't feel "right" to me.
  10. I didn't. I told my hubby that I wouldn't hear or speak of children until we bought a house.
    I also worry and over-analyze--- A LOT. So-- I told my hubby when HE was ready-- I would be ready. Because he is the exact opposite of me. He makes up his mind and sticks with it. He tends to be my rock. I knew if he was ready-- I would be ready with him.

    We bought a house in November of 2006.
    He brought up the topic around Christmas...

    Our little one is due in November and we cannot wait! :love:
  11. ^Aww Congrats! :yes:

    I don't feel 100% ready either, it's going to be a tough/happy next few years for me and SO, but we're up for it, and can't wait to meet our new son!!!! :biggrin:
  12. you will feel ready when you're willing to sacrifice your time and your body (if you still feel you're afraid to get fat, just forget about it)
  13. I feel the same way as you both do. I will be 35 next weekend and I have never had the desire to have children. I love kids but I do not want my own. There have been a couple times when I had pregnancy scares, both in my 30s, and the thought of being pregnant and having a child was absolutely devastating.
  14. We knew we wanted kids when we married, but wanted to be financially ready. We said we wanted two. I knew I was ready when I would see pregnant women and dream and feel a little jealous, then seeing babies everywhere and feeling like I was missing out on something wonderful. And I was. Motherhood is amazing, every day. With that being said, we no longer want two - we have our one and only, and are extremely happy with being a family of three.
  15. I didn't know I was ready until I found out I was pregnant. I had my first child at 26 and I was so excited and scared at the same time. My whole pregnancy was nerve wrecking because I worried all the time about something going wrong and if I would be a good enough mother.
    I must say, two kids later, that having my children is the best thing that has ever happend to me. They give me purpose and I must admit I enjoy the unconditional love they give as well.