Help,... I need opinions!!

  1. Hey my loves,...

    I have been faced with an issue at the dinner table last night.

    My oldest daughter is turning 14 in July and has asked her father and I for something that to me is just crazy!!! I guess my daughter has been doing her own research on Hermes. She has asked that instead of us giving her our traditional Central Park birthday party at the restaurant there we buy her a Hermes Garden Party and an agenda in Poitron color,.. yes she even said Poitron!! and to deposit the rest of the money that we would have spent in her savings account.

    So I asked her what would we do for her birthday in general and she said "spend it at the beach with you guys and my freinds, I don't want a cake mom, that's so yesterday" I almost died when she said this! No cake! Then my 7 yr old got into the conversation and said "yeah mom we can get cupcakes, I think you should give her what she wants, I don't want to be at the restaurant in the summer either I want to be at the beach"

    Although it's her birthday I don't feel that she should have a 2k bag wrapped around her arm at such a younge age. My husband doesn't think that this is a big deal because he purchased various designer bags for her. But I always feel like when it comes to these things my husband doesn't side with me but with her.

    Although I know my husband has made up his mind I will not give her an answer until next week. I want the honest opinion of the ladies here that I dearly love. No matter what he says I am still the mother and what I say will go!

    he might be the head of the house but I am the neck! And you know what that means!

    Every opinion counts!!! Pls reply,.. good or bad.
  2. I think thats just a little too pricey for a 14yr. old.
  3. That is tough! She seems wise beyond her years! While I think $2k on handbag at 14 is a bit much, she seems to really appreciate what it is. I know that I was given expensive gifts at a young age, but did not truly appreciate them, and as a result, did not care for them as I should have. So my best advice is that you must trust your instincts as you know your daughter and family better than anyone else. If your gut tells you that is simply too much to spend, then you are right. You can always tell her that a Garden Party is something you would consider a little later down the road, but for right now, it is a bit too much and try to find something more age appropriate. But if you think it is something she will treasure, and you are comfortable spending the $$$, then why not.

    No one is here to judge you, just to shamlessly root you on!
  4. I know,.. she would treasure it and never damage it,. she has the gift of the love of couture like my mother and I,.. she already has her own little collection that she's been asking me to allow her to join this group and I have told her NO because mommy needs her space and this is my gettaway from home. I just think it's too pricey.
  5. Baggaholic,

    You said DH has bought various designer bags for your DD previously, so it's not like it will be the 1st time for her. BUT, I agree with Ranskimmie, it's a HERMES fgs, and I do think a 14 yr old is just a tad too young to own an H bag. Perhaps buy the lil agenda or a wallet for starter?
  6. Then follow your instinct that it is too pricey, especially at 14. I agree with Sarah ^^ too. Maybe start her with an agenda or wallet.
  7. Even the agenda she wants is expensive, she wants the one that she can use as a notebook. The big one. She goes to High School next year.
  8. i say go for it :yes: your daughter seems to be really down to earth (put the rest in my saving account)
    yeah it is an expensive bag for a 14 year old but you are gonna spend the money anyways on the planned party. so why not spending it on something that lasts and gives her joy for such along time.
    and it is not like she wants it all she is willed to give up the party for the bag so i would buy it (and borrow it from time to time :lol: )
  9. This is what my husband said.
  10. What can I say- the girl just has impeccable taste! Who can blame her, especially after seeing your amazing collection. Only you can decide what is appropriate for your daughter, and if you think its a bit much, then maybe there is another designer bag or item that she would also love just as much.
  11. Baggaholic- I don't mean to be judgamental or offend you...because my I'm sure my daughter and I will face the same issues when she is in her teens.

    I think that your daughter seeing how much you have, in terms of purses or whatever, she doesn't see it as an issue. What is 2K when mom spend $XXX on her bags and stuff. It will be a upward fight for you because, how can you tell her that it's a price issue when it's really not a money issue, it's more of an issue of the purse being inappropriate for her age.

    I think you should have a one on one with her and ask her why she would want that particular bag. Why not a LV Pouchette or another purse more suitable for her age. I think you also need to tell her that a party for her is not just for her, it's for the whole family to celebrate with her, so her share would just be a fraction of the total costs.

    In any case, I think that you raised a very smart girl who thinks and plan.
  12. not knowing your daughter and her perception/appreciation of expensive things it's hard to comment. You're her mom. I would trust your judgement. If you have the means and shes used to a high-end lifestyle, it may not be a big deal to her KWIM?
    Let us know what happens!

  13. Nope! she only wants this one.
  14. i totally agree with everything you said lilach. it makes sense.
    she isn't asking you to spend more than you expected to on her birthday, just expressed how she would rather it be spent. the point is, after all, her birthday. it's not a flashy or impractical bag. the evelyne would be another nice choice for anyone under 18 or 20, but the garden party is even more understated. she is also consistent - you said she is interested in fashion, and she is starting high school. get her hooked now - she'll have motivation to do well in school. besides, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree; guess where she got her interest.
    she's already used to designer bags. sounds like you needed to post this a few years ago before her collection even got started, because if that had been postponed, you might not be in this pickle, and i say pickle because let's face it, she probably knows that dad is on board, and you're in the dog house with her if you are the one saying 'no.' (oh dear, now i know what i have to look forward to.)
    PLEASE post your ultimate decision.
  15. Everything you said has already been asked and said even about the party. But she said she wants it. There is no reason she says she's in-love with it. I also agree with you about my having expensive bags, but I am an adult I work very hard and I can buy whatever I want. That's what she needs to learn. when you want something that expensive you have to earn it, it shouldn't be something that's given to you. Besides my point is that she is way to young to have such an expensive purse.