Help...Divorce question

  1. I normally do not post questions, but my husband has asked for a divorce after 18 years and I have a simple question for anyone who may know the answer to this...How long after filing for divorce can someone change their name back to their maiden name.??
    I know there's generally a 6 mo. waiting period but do you have to wait until the waiting period is over before changing your name back or can you request to change your name back right after filing the request for divorce? And do you make this request with the courts or social security administration?.

    Thanks for anyone's help with this question.
  2. I'm really sorry for what you are going through. I hope some of the members can answer your question.
  3. I hope so too. This all took me by surprise over the weekend and I've just got my head above water. So once he files the paperwork, the first thing I want to do is change my name back to my maiden name. He's in Japan, and I'm in California with our 2 children. You can imagine what the scenario was!!
  4. ^bump

    Unfortunately, I don't have the answers, either, but I'm pretty sure someone has the answers here, too. Sorry about what you're going through...I wish you the best of luck.
  5. Holli, I am so sorry to hear this...I hope you get your answers.

    Be well, and know you'll be in my thoughts
  6. Holliwood,

    The name change is generally part of the orders in the final divorce decree. What you do is take the decree to the agencies like social security, driver's license, bank, etc. to make the name change.

    I am very sorry to hear you are going through this, I hope you have a good lawyer because after 18 years you are probably entitled to a good share of the marital assets, part of his retirement (if he has one) and probably even some spousal support. Long term marriages like yours are looked at very differently by the courts, especially in California, so be sure you get a fair shake in all this.

    I am not an attorney but I work in the court system and am very familiar with the family courts.
  7. Oh my, Holli. I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope that you are doing okay. I'm not really sure about the answer to your question, but my parents are also separated and I think my mom will be filing the papers in April of next year. When she and I were at her lawyers' office, her lawyer said that she could file the papers to change her name right along with the divorce papers. I'm not sure if it would be different from you, since you're on the other side.

    ..Again, I'm truly sorry that this is happening to you. I hope you and your children are okay :heart:
  8. Hi I don't specialize in family law but most divorce proceeding papers you file have a section where you can choose to go back to your maiden name. I think you should also change it with the Social Security Agency (so you still get paid!). I'm not aware of a waiting period for name changes. Hope this helps. Take care.
  9. Roo is absolutely right. You can make the name change as part of a Judgment for Divorce. Of course, every state may be different. Make sure you get a certified copy of the decree because many agencies require that in order to change your name.

    I am so sorry you have to go through this! Please seek legal counsel as there are many issues that can arise even post-judgment. And if you need a referral, just let me know. I would be happy to help!
  10. I always heard that in CA you are entitled to half of everything.

    I found this online for you:

    [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][SIZE=+2]"Should I change my name back to my maiden name?"
    [/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]
    [/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][SIZE=-1]Many women want to change their name back to their maiden name. Think this through carefully. If you have children in school, it can be very confusing and uncomfortable for them and their teachers if their mother suddenly has a new name. If you had a short-term marriage, and no children, or grown children, it is usually very easy to change your name as part of the divorce. In fact, many states have a box to check on the court forms indicating that the divorcing wife will return to her maiden or former name. If you change your name pursuant to the divorce there is usually no extra cost and no extra burden.[/SIZE][/FONT]

    [SIZE=-1][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]If you want to change your name because you are angry with the spouse that you are divorcing, go beyond the anger and think of the ramifications. If it will be detrimental to your career (you are known well as a business woman with this name) or it will hurt your children, then consider those issues. Also, it will be very important to change your name with the credit-reporting agencies, social security, the IRS, the state tax authorities, your professional associations etc. If the change will not hurt you or anyone else, and it is a name you like, go ahead in change it; if you didn't like your maiden name, this may be a time to create your new "stage" name[/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif].[/FONT][/SIZE]
  11. This was one of the questions that the magistrate asked me during our final dissolution hearing, about changing back to my maiden name. I chose not to because I wanted my children and I to have the same name. Now that I'm re-married, I am hyphenated.
  12. I am so sorry to hear about this. My brother's ex-wife sprung a surprise on him and they just finalized their divorce recently, so I know how much you must be suffering. I hope you and your children will rally around one another.
  13. When I went to court to finalize my divorce, I was granted my maiden name back. And I took the decree to driver's license, social sec. office, etc. to have my last name changed. I'm so sorry to hear about this Holli especially after 18 years.

  14. YOu need to not worry about name change and get to a lawyer ASAP!!! Today. I am not kidding. Time is of the essence. Start photocopying EVERY piece of financial paperwork you can find for as far back as you can find. Take out 1/2 of all of your accounts and start an account in your name. I am totally serious. DO NOT wait until he calls the shots. Did you ever think he would ask for a divorce? Then as time proceeds you might also be shocked as to what he can do in a divorce. Good luck to you!!
    ACT sad LATER.
  15. I chose to change back to my maiden name because my son has my maiden name. But if something would ever happen with me and my current DH, I would leave my married name because we have two daughters together. It does hurt my son because he is the only member of the family that has my maiden name.