GoT Pond Legacy, Broke UP WITH BOYFRIEND

I got this in my email from a Girlfriend...sorry it's long.......If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.
Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.

· Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself

a year later for staying when things are not better.

The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.
Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending... compromise is two way street.
You need time to heal between relationships... there is nothing cute about baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship
You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals... look for someone complimentary... not supplementary.
Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always knows where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted.

· Never move into his mother's house.

· Never co-sign for a man.

· Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.


Share this with other women and men (just so they know)... You'll make someone smile, another rethink her/his choices.
 
I have been there. Unfortunately when I found out my my ex-husbands lying and went through my divorce I had not yet found Coach. It would have been nice to go out, get a great bag like you did and come on here to vent and receive compliments. Love this board. Although the bag can not take away all the pain know that you did what was best for you.

Love the bag. Can not wait to get my pond bag. hopefully tomorrow :party:
 
I am sorry about your break up with your boyfriend. I really dont think he deserves you, lying is very bad for a relationship, but only you know deep inside your hearth of he should get a second chance or not. I am sure you will find the right thing to do. you have allthe answers. good luck
 
Heya gettin...if it's any help I recently ended my relationship with my BF after almost 2 years. AND...part of my retail therapy is a black leather Ali which is on its way!! Congrats on your pond satchel!

Big hugs to you...pm me if you want to chat. Good for you for ending it - you don't deserve to be with anyone who lies. Onward!! With great Coach bags!!
 
And he's never bought me any Coach anything!!! Cinediva, he did admit the next day that he had gone, do you think I should forgive him for coming clean and being honest later?? Better late than never? But he has been somewhere on a few other occasions and not answered his phone and made me worry all night. Is this normal???

No,I wouldn't say normal - is he real young btw? Don't second guess yourself. Sorry you are going thru this but it will most likely be sooner or later so may as well be now.
Good luck.
Congrats on the pond!
 
I got this in my email from a Girlfriend...sorry it's long.......If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.
Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.

· Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself

a year later for staying when things are not better.

The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.
Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending... compromise is two way street.
You need time to heal between relationships... there is nothing cute about baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship
You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals... look for someone complimentary... not supplementary.
Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always knows where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted.

· Never move into his mother's house.

· Never co-sign for a man.

· Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.


Share this with other women and men (just so they know)... You'll make someone smile, another rethink her/his choices.
Thank you for sharing that.

gettinpurseonal, don't second guess yourself. Stay strong and spend more time out with friends and family. That will keep your mind (though most likely not completely) off of him.
 
I believe you are looking at the poppy duffle, pic attached to this post. Also, here is me (with no makeup in ex bf's dirty t-shirt) with my new Pond satchel.
Jen, this is what I have found from the "men mistakes"..I have always seemed to make most of my life..I have learned to always WATCH THE BEHAVIOR not the words. I now ask myself do I feel more like the me I like when I am with him or do I feel badly about myself? I have made some grave errors staying in relationships way too long and questioning my judgment if I was being too harsh on a guy. My kid's father left me after many years of marriage and always made me feel "small" and himself "large" to make himself feel better and gain control. He left me for mere 17 year old Swedish foreign exchange student I had for the summer in my lovely Vermont Farm. I supported 2 kids and had two jobs while he went off ....selling all that I owned as my farm went up for auction. He married her and is still with her. I have a nice man now. He married me. He makes me tea or cooks for me when I do not feel well. He will take off from work if I need a doctor and I cannot drive for a procedure. He loves me for me...and "gets my" Coach addictions and all... He brings me a tiny present when he knows I am low...He is not the prince on a white horse and he is not always so exciting like those bad boys we all are drawn to..but he is stable and reliable and I never worry where he is or if he lies to me. Don't get used to chaos. A nice guy, sits you down and looks you in the eye and says, "Jen, what do I have to do to make it right"..remember that...and use your gut...for you know why you broke up with him...And now, enjoy that gorgeous satchel....and move on...never question your first decision,...for it is usually correct..
you go girl....hope all of our love here helps...
Lynn:heart:
 
Thank you for sharing that.

gettinpurseonal, don't second guess yourself. Stay strong and spend more time out with friends and family. That will keep your mind (though most likely not completely) off of him.
I just love that PyAri..for it is so true..much like a poem I read once..I will find it for you....and send....thanks for printing that for Jennifer and all of us...:heart:
 
Jen, this is what I have found from the "men mistakes"..I have always seemed to make most of my life..I have learned to always WATCH THE BEHAVIOR not the words. I now ask myself do I feel more like the me I like when I am with him or do I feel badly about myself? I have made some grave errors staying in relationships way too long and questioning my judgment if I was being too harsh on a guy. My kid's father left me after many years of marriage and always made me feel "small" and himself "large" to make himself feel better and gain control. He left me for mere 17 year old Swedish foreign exchange student I had for the summer in my lovely Vermont Farm. I supported 2 kids and had two jobs while he went off ....selling all that I owned as my farm went up for auction. He married her and is still with her. I have a nice man now. He married me. He makes me tea or cooks for me when I do not feel well. He will take off from work if I need a doctor and I cannot drive for a procedure. He loves me for me...and "gets my" Coach addictions and all... He brings me a tiny present when he knows I am low...He is not the prince on a white horse and he is not always so exciting like those bad boys we all are drawn to..but he is stable and reliable and I never worry where he is or if he lies to me. Don't get used to chaos. A nice guy, sits you down and looks you in the eye and says, "Jen, what do I have to do to make it right"..remember that...and use your gut...for you know why you broke up with him...And now, enjoy that gorgeous satchel....and move on...never question your first decision,...for it is usually correct..
you go girl....hope all of our love here helps...
Lynn:heart:
That is some very good advice.
I'm inspired.
 
All of you-
Thank you SO much for your support. I am too forgiving, always questioning myself, feel bad for setting limits... I don't have any family really so I feel really alone. I want to call him to talk, explain why I made the decision I did...I shouldn't though, right?

Coach Bag, your story is so inspirational!! I hope it happens that way with me. How did he get your email address? Anybody know a nice man in Texas you can send my way?

To keep this semi-on topic, I put my stuff in my new satchel - I can't wait to carry it to work tomorrow!

He was at a Chamber of Commerce event in the town where I live (he didn't live here at the time), met my cousin (who still lives in my hometown, where he went to college) and recognized her maiden name as the same as mine. He asked about me and she told him where I worked. You should have seen my face when I got that e-mail. I turned around to my assistant and said "This e-mail is from the man I have been in love with ever since college!" I suppose it was meant to be! I went from the depths of misery in January to being married to Prince Charming in August...Fairy tales do happen.
 
Jen, this is what I have found from the "men mistakes"..I have always seemed to make most of my life..I have learned to always WATCH THE BEHAVIOR not the words. I now ask myself do I feel more like the me I like when I am with him or do I feel badly about myself? I have made some grave errors staying in relationships way too long and questioning my judgment if I was being too harsh on a guy. My kid's father left me after many years of marriage and always made me feel "small" and himself "large" to make himself feel better and gain control. He left me for mere 17 year old Swedish foreign exchange student I had for the summer in my lovely Vermont Farm. I supported 2 kids and had two jobs while he went off ....selling all that I owned as my farm went up for auction. He married her and is still with her. I have a nice man now. He married me. He makes me tea or cooks for me when I do not feel well. He will take off from work if I need a doctor and I cannot drive for a procedure. He loves me for me...and "gets my" Coach addictions and all... He brings me a tiny present when he knows I am low...He is not the prince on a white horse and he is not always so exciting like those bad boys we all are drawn to..but he is stable and reliable and I never worry where he is or if he lies to me. Don't get used to chaos. A nice guy, sits you down and looks you in the eye and says, "Jen, what do I have to do to make it right"..remember that...and use your gut...for you know why you broke up with him...And now, enjoy that gorgeous satchel....and move on...never question your first decision,...for it is usually correct..
you go girl....hope all of our love here helps...
Lynn:heart:
Wonderful Lynn! It's so great for all of us to hear everyone's story and words of advice and inspiration, and everyone's life experiences. It's comforting to know we can all share and exchange our thoughts and feelings and help each other out in times of need! :yes: