For moms-kids parties

  1. Has this happened to you? From talking with friends it seems to be pretty common. A parent is planning a birthday party for their child and invites are sent and RSVP and then the day of the party there are mothers who bring extra children to the party and expect them to be included. I mean these are not at home parties but parties that cost $15.00+ per child and it does get expensive. My one friend had to hire a extra lifeguard at a pool party at a health club for $50.00 because one Mom brought 3 other kids. When you have a party at these places the parent can leave and go shopping so it is not like they are stuck there. We are talking about parties for older kids 8+ and yet these parents still bring all these other kids. Of course it becomes a problem with goodie bags and food. Most of my friends get angry but will not confront anyone. I always feel no matter what I will have 4 extra people so I kind of just add it in. With my kids friends I usually invite brothers and sisters since they are all neighborhood friends.
    So is this now the norm????
  2. Yeah, no point in making a fuss and spoiling the kid's birthday. Besides I always have a guilty feeling about saying stuff like that - that it'll jeopardize my son's friendships somehow, and cater extra to siblings and parents who decide to hang around.

    Not on the topic of birthday parties, but I have the same problem continuously. My son has a good friend who's mom (I think) babysits another of my son's classmates. A lot of times my son says "Mom, can [friend] come over and play?"..of course I say OK, and then the mom comes over and drops both the kids off and they stay for hours. I feel I must say something, but since all 3 kids are in the same class I feel bad to.
  3. What I usually do is I write on the invitation to RSVP for headcount. When they call I usually let them know the specifics of the party and try to elicit a response if they're expecting to bring their other kids. I always make extra goodie bags just in case. I figure the more kids the merrier, even though it hurts the pocketbook. Your child has a bday party once a year so why not make the best of it?

    Another related question: Is it ok to leave your child at a bday party or are the parents supposed to stay with them?

  4. I think it depends on the age as kids just get easier to watch with time. I still don't leave my son and he just turned 8 and don't know when I will! LOL Paranoid mommy!

    I have the same issues with our parties. Most of the mothers that have brought their siblings though try to pay for their extra kids themselves. Of course I don't let them but the thought is nice. And as someone else mentioned I also always make extra goodie bags. It is more expensive but it's just dealing with people I suppose! :shrugs:
  5. hm, my child is still too small so i can't say anything about that but I honestly don't think this ever happened, or if very rarely, at my brother's and my b-day parties. if, it would have been someone invited for him or me... but I really don't think someone just came and dropped of all their children... sounds like we are a bit uptight about that but I honestly think it would be frowned upon... (don't know though...)
  6. My son's birthday is coming up, and in past parties this has been a HUGE problem. People will show up with not only the Mom and Dad and other siblings, but with nannies as well. On his invitation this year, I wrote, "This is a drop-off party. Please plan on picking up your child at ?pm." I am hoping this goes over OK!!
    On another note....I gave up doing goodie bags a few years back (now qwe do a craft that the kids can take home)...because it was such a stress...but a really good idea that was recently brought to my attention was for each child to bring a new book to the party. At the end of the party, everyone gets to take a book home. I haven't done it yet, but it sounds great!!
  7. Yeah its the norm. Since my son had his first birthday party i have had extra people to show up that were not on the list. then i also get people that i have inevited they'll call sometimes and ask can they bring as extra child and i say "YES" to make my son happy. But dont say anything when the extra kids come i just pay for the party and let them have fun. I dont say anything because i dont want to upset my son or anybody else.