First H boutique visit - too shy so not a really good experience

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  1. Yesterday I finally went in to the local Hermès boutique for the first time. I had been researching and studying the brand trying to make myself ready but I am sorry to say I felt it kind of all went into the drain when I entered the store and I didn't manage very well - so due to that and due to myself being to awkward it ended up being a not so good experience.

    An SA approached me and I wanted to try on a pair of Oran sandals. She went to search for them and I walked around browsing while waiting. It turned out she couldn't find me when she came back and I was actually not sure if she was a bit annoyed about that / me wondering around instead of waiting in one place which made me really intimidated / unsecure. :-s

    When I tried the shoes on I wanted to have a look in the mirror to see if it was the right size and how they looked on me. So I took a few steps towards a mirror and she immediately stopped me to tell me I was not supposed to step outside the carpet and directly on the floor. This made me even more insecure / feeling that I might be annoying this SA... :-s

    I ended up also looking at one of the belts and trying that on so I was there for a little while. During our conversations she had to ask me several times to repeat what I was saying / asking about. I do not normally speak with a thin voice or something but I do not know if I was so shy and intimidated by the whole thing so I actually came through not speaking loud enough. But this sort of contributed to the whole awkward situation... made me even more nervous and there you had it. I actually got so nervous or whatever (dont really know what got in to me :shocked:) so I ended up buying the sandals which was NOT part of the plan... And with very bad timing due to the financial situation at the moment.

    When I was buying the sandals I was registered in their system. She just asked me for the name and an e-mail address if I wanted to receive newsletter but she didn't note any adress or phone number. Is this normal? However she asked me of my nationality and I stated that one. I actually come from the neighbor country but I have been living here for the past 25 years. However I stated my original country and I regretted that afterwards. Now I am thinking that I might not come through like a local resident... Do you think that it might cause any problems when dealing with them (for ex. if I would like to have a go for a Birkin later on?)? I am thinking about asking them to change the note on that one the next time I am buying from them but if not necessary / if it will not influence my relationship with them it might be best not too...? It might come across as a bit strange asking them to change the note on my citizenship does it not? But it really nags me now...

    After purchasing the sandals I asked if they had any Bolide since I wished to check it out and I couldn't see one on display. The SA said they should be available but mentioned she had been away for two days and she went back to talk to the store manager. She came back saying they could write me when they had one asking which size and color I preferred. So I stated that and almost ran out of the boutique.

    I really do not know what happened but I just felt I acted weird and stupid all of the time probably seeming to be a very strange person. I had absolutely no succes in having a normal conversation with the SA. And it was probably not her fault but just me acting unnatural and strange.

    Now I am a bit sad... this was not how I meant it to be, especially not with my first purchase! Not really being able to be happy about the sandals but more having a bad conscience because I was NOT supposed to buy anything. And I am not even sure they fit properly (wrote another thread about this)! :annoyed:

    So - when I go in there the next time I really have to put it together and I am hoping to get a fresh start with a new SA. But how can I be sure? You do not really get to choose the SA but somebody that is not occupied with a customer approaches you... I guess there is a fair chance that I get approached by someone else the next time...

    If they write me about the Bolide I am not sure what to do or if I will automatically end up with the same SA again since she was the one who took note of this?

    Any advice or similar experiences that somehow you managed to turned around to the better with time? It would be of great help if there are some positive stories out there... maybe some of you also felt that it didn't start out very well but it ended up great in the long run?

    Just feeling a bit sad here and hoping that I can go back and turn things around and start a great relationship with them. I hope that I can overcome this stupid nervousness. But now I am even more intimidated thinking of going back then I was before I went in, because of this experience.
  2. I’m sure you didn’t upset anyone, you sound very charming and pleasant. Sales staff deal with all sorts of unpleasantness, so I think it would be like a breath of fresh air for them dealing with you !
    I see it as a shop like any other, and find the idea of a relationship creepy and unnecessary.
    verytotes, carmen56, evachan and 19 others like this.
  3. Thank you for your comment! It is likely that I did not come through as a rude or unpleasant person but just nervous and weird stepping over myself too eager to please in some annoying way... I just wish I would have been able to be more cool about it, seeing it as a shop like every other shop, acting natural. After all I did spend some of my money in there, there should be no need to apologize or feel stupid. I guess I was just too overwhelmed... And maybe influenced by some of the horror stories I have read / heard. I too find the idea of a relationship pretty creepy and that is the difficult part for me. I just does not come natural to me acting that way when talking to a SA, so when I try to bear in mind that I "need to start building some kind of relationship" I just get nervous and act weird so instead everything gets kind of awkward and I feel I have made a really strange impression. Better to just be yourself and dont give a damm about what you should or should not do I suppose. But sometimes easier said than done...
    Etriers likes this.
  4. People (especially SAs) don't think about us too much - and trust me, I have anxiety problems and sometimes even buy stuff even when I don't want to (working on it). Just don't worry, keep looking for a better SA with whom you'll click. And yeah relationship-wise: I doubt there is genuine interest of (most of) SAs to build anything beyond you spending $ with them so honestly you don't have to be witty, funny, clever, beautiful, well dressed etc etc.
    One note on the Bolide - ensure you are firm with yourself about not buying Bolide if you don't have funds atm but they invite you to see the bag. I made this mistake (not with Bolide but something else).
    evachan, insidemysoul, Nerja and 4 others like this.
  5. Thank you for commenting on my post. And yes... the SA's of course care most about the amount you spend... it sure isn't a true "relationship" you build with them if you try to do so. In the end they are people doing their job and of course with the goal of selling as much as possible. So bottom line, they probably care most of the amount you spend with them and not so much anything else I suppose :smile:

    A very relevant note on the Bolide. It is absolutely crucial that I do not get carried away and buy if I get to check it out anytime soon, since I do not have the money to spend right now. But I suppose that it would be ok to go in and have a look at it so I can get clear on whether I like it or not and if so, which size should I go for... I have never seen it live so I need to check it out to be sure. And hopefully it is ok not to buy on every occasion, like in every other shop. I mean sometimes you have to think about things and so on, especially with these expensive items.

    Just hope that I can find a SA that can make me feel more at ease or that I can find that part of me when the SA that I met this time if I continue with her. I suppose it lies in myself but if a click with the SA I suppose that person could definitely help me relax...
    Etriers and nikka007 like this.
  6. The vast majority of SAs at luxury shops just want to make it through the day—like anyone else! They don’t care that much about clients. I think we often project our own insecurities and create drama that doesn’t really exist.
  7. This experience & how you felt should not be.
    I think your should find another SA who could be more accommodating & makes you feel a little bit
    more at ease.
    Shopping should be fun & exciting & the potential is there for you to continue to enjoy H.
    Don't let this SA spoil any future experience you way want to have
    jblended, tlamdang08 and cremse like this.
  8. Thank you for your comment. :smile:

    I do not blame the SA. More myself... You are absolutely right and I sure did project my own insecurity in this case... but still wondering how to overcome this so my next visit can be a nice experience :smile:
  9. Maybe you can remind yourself that you’re just different sides of the same coin. You want to buy and she wants to sell. In the end, your both just people trying to work with each other.
    aksaiyo, evachan, Gnuj and 5 others like this.
  10. That's too bad you got nervous and weird, but I have been there before, in a situation that gets more and more awkward the more you try to correct it. Maybe you can go shopping with a friend next time you visit luxury stores? - it might help you to feel more relaxed. Is it possible to go see the bolide in a resale shop where you live? I wanted a bolide super bad and went to look at some second-hand ones first so I knew 100% it was going to be right. Imagine if you get a call saying they have a bolide for you and then you go in just to see it and not buy it - that might make you feel like you've disappointed an SA or something. Just something to consider. :smile:
  11. Agree...
    OP you can also go into the store when that SA is off & give yourself a chance to
    experience a different felling, perhaps
    tlamdang08 and cremse like this.
  12. I avoided H for the longest time because I was intimidated and what I can say now is I completely overanalyzed it. We talk about building a relationship, but it goes both ways. They're not just trying to make the sale that day, they want to build a long-term customer. I think there's also a lot of pressure to find the "one," the right SA with whom you just click. It's not exactly realistic with dating and it's even less so when trying to build a customer/SA relationship.

    I also had the benefit of traveling to different boutiques. I don't have one locally, but do have a few within an hour flight and quite a few more within two hours. If there was awkwardness, I knew it didn't matter because by the time I'd visit the boutique again, no one would remember who I was. Doing this a couple of times made me realize the vast majority of experiences range from normal shopping to wonderful and it will also vary within the boutique, dispelling any preconceived notions or worry I had previously. If you have a chance to visit a boutique while travelling, I highly recommend doing so, especially during slower shopping times to be able to chat with them and enjoy the experience.
    Mariapia, cremse and ladysarah like this.
  13. 100% and overthinking it doesn't help... it makes things worse. Just RELAX... shopping is supposed to be fun.
  14. @cremse I agree with the others who said that you come across as a wonderful person. May I ask which city was the boutique? I am asking because in Europe there is no commission and I do believe that can lead to a more quality experience and less pressure selling.
    Mariapia, Phiona88, Etriers and 4 others like this.
  15. Oh interesting point Sarah. I never knew that.