Ever been cheated on. . .and still wanted to stay?

  1. I know you ladies and gents have definitely been through some ups and downs, but. . .Have you ever been cheated on by someone you really really loved therefore making you not want to leave them?
  2. I hope this is a hypothetical question!!!!!!!!!!!

    But back to the question. Luckily I haven't yet, I think about it everyday though (guess it comes with a lack of trust?) and I actually think I would stay with him. :cry: I'm extremely weak and attached like that and I hate it, one day though.

    Also while I haven't been cheated on, other bad things have happened in which I SHOULD'VE left but here we are, 3 years. and still going :amazed:
  3. Noooooo im sorry if ur in the situation, but a cheater doesnt change its spots! ive gone through so many of these with my friends who just cant say no (not saying im better but i havent been in the situation) this guy is not right if you give in her will hold you back for more years than you can afford! you need to be free! toughen up get rid of that weight!
  4. My DH and I have been together for 14 years and I believe that he is 100% faithful. I really trust him and have had male friends of ours talk about how upstanding he is when he is out without me. That being said, if I was to find out that my husband had an affair (one night), I think that I would not leave him...I do believe that people make mistakes, and I would try to get over it for our family's sake. If I was to find out that he had a long standing affair, I don't think I would be able to stay. To me it is not about the sex...that is just a physical act...but the lies and deception that would go into a long-term affair, is something I could not stand. Hopefully you are not in this situation, but if so....you are the only one that can judge the import of your relationship, and what it would cost you in the long-term to forgive your mate.
  5. I agree with mello - I hope this is a hypo only.

    Not wanting to leave because you love the person so much? Sure! My mind was definitely weak at the time, making me NOT WANT to leave. But I compensate verbally by breaking the relationship loose, while waiting for my senses to catch up with my words.
    (It's late...not sure if i'm making sense.) :blink:
  6. No. It was the other way around. IMO, I don't believe that a cheater's always a cheater (speaking from experience) Once you find someone you love then there is no need, for you had found the right one. Besides, I was really young and don't know any better. So please don't hate me :shame:

    Girl, I hope you're not in this situation. We're here for you!
  7. i don't think it's a matter of choice whether to leave someone or not. when it's over, it's over. on the other hand, if it's worth saving, something inside will tell you. things will fall in their places naturally. trust in yourself to know which way to go. hope this thread is about a friend and not about you. cheers.
  8. i've been in this situation where i didn't leave. but i would never do it again. you may forgive but trust me, you can never forget. cheating is unforgivable. unless you wanna be in a relationship where you constantly ask yourself whether your boyfriend really is where he said he would be.
  9. I have to agree with ANNEMERRICK. I've been married for almost 19 years and I know my husband so well, even I know him better than he knows himself, so I can bet my life that he has never cheated on me. Plus, it's a relationship where the love is imbalanced, meaning he loves me more than I love him, if you know what I mean?! So, I almost want to say that if he ever cheated on me, it would be soo over...I wouldn't be able to get over the fact that he has betrayed everything our marriage has stood for, especially the TRUST.
  10. I dont want to say anything just yet. . .I dont really know all the details :sad: But I'm really dying inside right now.

    Thanks guys for replying, I took everything everyone said to heart and I'm keeping you guys in mind.
  11. I was going to say the above almost word for word-and my husband and I will be married for 14 years next month and together for 19 years in July.
  12. maybe this is because i'm young and i live in a town where lots of drinking is actively encouraged, but i think that if it was a one-night bad, drunken decision, then i could try to forgive. i don't know if i could, but i think i'd be willing to try. other than that, if it was a regular one night stand or an ongoing affair, i don't think i would. what that is is a conscious decision to do something that he knows would hurt me, and i don't think i'd stand for that.
  13. oh no, you made your second post while i was typing, i'm so sorry! if you need an ear, PM me, i'll be happy to listen.
  14. I haven't and don't think it will happen but if it did, it would just crush me completely. Like others have said, I can forgive but forgetting is the tough part.
  15. Oh girl, I'm so sorry! I can't tell you what the right answer is b/c I don't know the details, but take care of yourself, I hope things end up ok!