Embarassing situation...

#16
^I have to agree on that one. And even if she did mean anything by it, just remember it's your money and you decide what you do with it. An besides that, most people spend money on things they don't really need to 'survive', like sigarettes, alcohol, cell phones (with enormeous bills) etc. I have no doubt that that woman certainly has some more or less 'expensive' habits which are equally deep or shallow as a handbag addiction. Just don't let people like that get to you!
 
#17
Varied_obsessions said:
How about this?
Two "Friends" met while out shopping.
Girl A:sad:wears high fashion and sports large jewelry) Hi, how are you? I haven't seen you in a while!

Girl B:sad:wears nice sensible clothes and is not pretentious) I'm fine(smiles earnestly)and how are you?

Girl A: Well My husband sent me on a trip around the world.

Girl B: Thaaat's niiice (smiles)

Girl A: AND he bought me this new 7 carat diamond ring.

Girl B: Thaaat's niiice(smiles)

Girl A: AND He bought me a New car AND this mink.

Girl B: Thaaaat's niiice(smiles)

Girl A: So what has YOUR husband done for you?(looks down her rhinoplastic nose)

Girl B: Well..... He sent me to charm school (Girl A:Tilts her head and sneers smugly) Where I learned to say...Thaaaat's Niiiice instead of F-You!!

Game set match!! lol So the next time someone is rude and pissy..... just say...Thaaaat's niiiice!! lol
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Lol I say 'that's nice" all the time, I always thought it was on obvious but polite way to say "I am completely uninterested in this conversation" but now I'll be laughing on the inside!
 
#18
I'm with Caraway. I don't see how saving for hardwood floors is any different from saving for a bag. Both are non-essential items. It's not like she said 'I can't afford one because i have to pay my sick mother's medical bills'! Why does personal fashion come in for so much judgement, whereas home improvements that just constitute 'home fashion' -- like nice floors or plush furniture -- do not??
 
#19
I'm with you. After I read it, I didn't get the feeling that the cashier was making social commentary on the OP's purchase. I think she was just admiring the bag and having a conversation. She also sounds like a purse lover, since she knew Tod's and used to buy Kate Spade. I think I might have been a little uncomfortable as well by her comments, but I probably wouldn't have thought that she was trying to embarrass me on purpose.
Elara said:
Maybe it's just me, and obviously I wasn't there to hear the tone of voice she used, but at the most, that would make me feel flattered but slightly uncomfortable since it she seems like she was giving you a compliment and fishing for pity at the same time. I don't think there was any reason to try and think of something snappy to say back, as that would have just made her feel bad. I think it's pretty amazing she recognized how nice a Tod's bag is- I know I wouldn't have a clue, as I don't know much about them since they aren't my style.

I admit, I've been guilty of saying stuff like that to people with things I like- but I do it in a joking manner by denigrating myself, and it's always meant to flatter their good taste, not make me out to be a whiny hanger-on.
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#20
Elara said:
Maybe it's just me, and obviously I wasn't there to hear the tone of voice she used, but at the most, that would make me feel flattered but slightly uncomfortable since it she seems like she was giving you a compliment and fishing for pity at the same time. I don't think there was any reason to try and think of something snappy to say back, as that would have just made her feel bad. I think it's pretty amazing she recognized how nice a Tod's bag is- I know I wouldn't have a clue, as I don't know much about them since they aren't my style.

I admit, I've been guilty of saying stuff like that to people with things I like- but I do it in a joking manner by denigrating myself, and it's always meant to flatter their good taste, not make me out to be a whiny hanger-on.
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i have to agree. i think the woman was just trying to make conversation or give a compliment, at most fishing for pity as Elara said. i don't think she was purposely trying to make the OP feel bad. People say things like that to me all the time ("wow a $1500 LV? i could never afford that, i have to take care of my children/car/mortage first"). it bugs me a little, but not so much to make a snappy comeback. i don't think they're trying to be rude, they're just trying to say how they envy you for being able to afford something that they could never imagine buying.
 
#21
bag-mania said:
Don't think twice about it. She was making conversation with a customer while doing her job. She would probably be surprised if she knew you were embarrassed. Sometimes talk is just talk, there isn't a deeper meaning to analyze.
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Agreed with. I doubt she had some hidden jealousy. It just seemed like regular small talk to me and her just being nice. Nothing to get embarassed over or think about twice.
 
#22
I felt embarassed because even after I thanked her for the compliment and told her that the bag did not cost anywhere near $2000, she kept repeating that it was a $2000 bag rather loudly, and then lamented that she could not buy expensive bags because she was re-doing her floors. If she had ended the conversation after my response, I wouldn't have thought twice about it. I guess I was just taken aback how upfront she was, and the fact that she kept repeating that particular price point.

I guess maybe I'm more sensitive than other people....I just haven't experienced comments like these from strangers.
 
#23
I find that what people can and cannot afford is more than often what they let themselves get and how they spend. What I'm saying is that while people may say these things, they might actually mean " I don't feel like I can spend that amount on a purse". I guess it's a tad better than telling you they think you're stupid for carrying such an expensive eye candy.
 
#24
I would have been embarassed too. But with her saying that she's redoing her floors in her house, does she mean that she needs to save money that's actually going somewhere, instead of funding a *frivilous* handbag? I don't think this way, but I wonder if that's what the cashier thought...
 
#26
Elara said:
Maybe it's just me, and obviously I wasn't there to hear the tone of voice she used, but at the most, that would make me feel flattered but slightly uncomfortable since it she seems like she was giving you a compliment and fishing for pity at the same time. I don't think there was any reason to try and think of something snappy to say back, as that would have just made her feel bad. I think it's pretty amazing she recognized how nice a Tod's bag is- I know I wouldn't have a clue, as I don't know much about them since they aren't my style.

I admit, I've been guilty of saying stuff like that to people with things I like- but I do it in a joking manner by denigrating myself, and it's always meant to flatter their good taste, not make me out to be a whiny hanger-on.
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bag-mania said:
Don't think twice about it. She was making conversation with a customer while doing her job. She would probably be surprised if she knew you were embarrassed. Sometimes talk is just talk, there isn't a deeper meaning to analyze.
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I agree with the two posters. I think she ws just talking to talk. Trying to give a compliment and bemoaning her own fate. Ater all, she mentioned she like Kate Spades (and though) I have some, I never understood the $200 nylon Sam bags. Which is to say to some that's crazy spending. Let alone a nylon Tod's. I have a friend who was bemoaning spending $60 on tix to a charity event. I teased her about it and asked her how much she was willing to spend on art supplies (she's a part-time artist, full time professor) and she said (somewhat jokingly) the sky's the limit! and I replied (somewhat jokingly) that's how it is for me and purses! For the lady at the checkout hardwood floors were more important. For me, I would look for a house with hardwood floors already and then spend on purses!
 
#27
finzup said:
Hmmm.. trying to think of a snappy comeback for that situation..
maybe you could've said,

"Well I've already done my home improvements and I saved up for this bag for a while and felt I deserved it."
or
"I'm independently wealthy and money is no object."
or
"Oh, is that how much it cost? I didn't even notice."
or
"i got it as a gift from my pimp"


:smile:
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Any response besides, "Well, I'm glad you like my bag. Good luck with your home improvements" will sound defensive. It's unnecessary to even acknowledge her awkwardness -- impolite to further her discomfort, to boot.

If this happened to me, I would just smile, thank her for the compliment and turn around. That's all.
 
#30
I guess the idea of spending what she thought was $2000 on a purse is an outrageous thought if her career choice is bagging groceries. I know this sounds really b!tc$y but that would have fallen out of my mouth if I had been the customer. Sorry I tend to be blunt.
 
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