Dumb Work Stuff - Tales of in-duh-viduals

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  1. Post the stupid work policies or decisions here. If I can steal a quote from Dilbert - True Tales of Induhviduals (emphasis on the duh)

    For example, I just had a supervisor ask me why I had a personal keyed lock on my company issued locker. We are supposed to use the combination lock that the company provides for us. I hate combination locks because you have the memorize the number, they take forever to open, etc. So I, in my ever so sarcastic way, told the supervisor - "According to the Americans With Disabilities Act, you have to provide reasonable accommodation for people that are unable to remember combinations. I would be happy to provide you with the key to my lock, if you require it." So far they haven't forced the issue.

    My next attempt to side track management will be the excuse of "I have a keyed lock because it is The Way of My People." I have been able to get away with a lot of stuff with that excuse. Usually people are too afraid for a EEO case to ask you what you mean. This excuse is courtesy of my Uncle who made it up coming back from Europe when he was in the military back in the mid-60's. He had a mustache which was not allowed. He gave that response to an Officer, "It's the Custom of My People" when asked about the mustache. It helps that my Uncle is 1/4 Hispanic and looks slightly ethnic, but not so much that you can pinpoint what origin his ethnicity comes from. Ever since then, that excuse has been a family joke and we use it whenever we can get away with it.
     
  2. ^^^Hm. I don't really know what to say.

    I think for someone to twist/use employment laws for one's benefit when the laws/benefits are not actually applicable to them is pretty unethical.
     
  3. You saw the part about the sarcasm, yes? :confused1:
     
  4. ^^I'm sorry I didn't. You seemed pretty happy your employer didn't push the issue with the personal keyed lock after you claimed ADA protection to your supervisor.

    Even if told to him/her sarcastically (in your mind), employers these days are so worried about any potential liability for litigation, I'm sure your supervisor probably took your comment with some degree of seriousness.
     
  5. Trust me, they knew I was being sarcastic. Both the supervisors were laughing after I said it and rolling their eyes. :roflmfao::rolleyes:
     
  6. hummm...let me think about this. I'm sure I can tell you all kinds of dumb work tales.
     
  7. If you want to hear about my stupid work policies simply watch Office Space.

    I am the one answering the phone. ugh
     
  8. redney, I can see how the OP's comment could be perceived as off-color, ill-putting, also... my boss and I have a very good relationship and we joke with each other a lot. I often make fun of his age by reminding him that I wasn't even born when he graduated from college. But there are definitely certain lines to draw, and threatening ligitation crosses that line.

    Not to mention that saying crazy things like, "It's the way of my people" to get away with not following the rules makes ALL ethnic groups look terrible. Shame on your uncle and you.
     
  9. Hah, I do that to my boss too! When he told me that he and his wife were celebrating their 25th anniversary last year, I said, "Aww! You got married the year I was born!"

    Anyhow, I can see both sides of the coin here... The owners of my company (including my boss) are very, very religious... So while I'm able to joke around to a certain degree, I need to be extremely careful of what I talk about...

    For example, when my boss told me who he planned to vote for in the upcoming Presidential election, I wanted to barf... However, I just nodded my head and smiled and said, "Well, it's great that you're a politically active person!" End of discussion, LOL :rolleyes:
     
  10. So anyway, back on topic...

    I had someone in all seriousness ask me who our contact at Google is because 'their search results are wrong - we should be much higher'.

    Our company signatures have a tagline that basically says not to print out emails unless absolutely necessary to save paper and the environment. Our new expenses tool forces us to photocopy already printed receipts and then fax them to a digital fax to upload them to the system. There is no facility for simply scanning and uploading.

    I could go on for years... will be back with more.
     
  11. Are you serious? :shrugs: Oh my goodness.... honestly, speechless.
     
  12. my life is boring
     
  13. Got another one for you... on phone to bank:

    'Mail is still being sent to my old address, but I've updated it with you'.
    'Right'.
    'Do you have my new address on file?'
    'Yes'.
    'Then why hasn't it been updated?'
    'We don't update new addresses for three months after we've received them'.
    'Errr... why not?'
    'I don't know - we just don't'.

    Riiiight.
     
  14. "It is the custom of my people", this just kills me!:roflmfao:
    I am so WASP-y, I would do anything to be able to say this with a straight face & see if it would work.
    Hilarious- I love it!
     
  15. I know. Really, "my people" could just be your immediate family and how you were raised, or it could be a wider diverse group that you belong to. It really could be anything you want it to be. That's the beauty of it. I find everything amusing and ironic. I find that even though I'm a natural redhead with freckles and look Irish, I'm not. In fact, if you really want to categorize me, I'm Hispanic thanks to Great Grandma Lupe (Guadalupe). No joke. But when I say "my people", I don't mean Hispanics. I mean the wacky, find a joke in everything, amused all the time family that I was raised in.

    Oh, and my Mom gave me a great suggestion for the combination lock situation at work. I made a photocopy of the company provided combination lock, cut it out and taped it over the keyed lock that I have on my locker. Now when you look down the row of lockers, mine doesn't stand out. You only notice it if you look really closely.