Do You Treat People Differently Based On How They Look?

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  1. Let's not discuss any certain aspect such as race, weight, language, what they wear, what they drive, where they live, how they talk, handicap, their economics, attractiveness or anything else.

    Just in general, even if you can't admit it publicly -- can you admit it to yourself? We all know it isn't right, but we all know people do it. It's almost a fact of life. People tend to gravitate towards people they identify with and feel comfortable with.

    It's one of the reasons I like boards like this. You can address the person's words without being concerened about how they look. You can't always tell if someone is being serious or humorous or insulting without seeing facial expressions or hearing tone of voice though. It's also one of the reasons I avoid threads where people post pictures of themselves. Sometimes I don't really want to see a picture of a poster since it just might change my opinion of them either for the better or worse. It shouldn't, but it might.
  2. Yes I do.
    I have an example, I had a girl crush on my neighbor, I thought she was so cool, perfect life (from my point of view), beautiful, classy. One day I noticed her hands. Her fingers were short and stubby and looked like what I think of a laundress's fingers. I know it is totally ridiculous to think that way but I was appalled by her hands and I don't admire her anymore.

    Besides my delusions and judging a person by their hands, I think ppl do judge by appearance because we are visual creatures and we react to images. We take pictures, go to museums to see paintings, look at magazines, watch tv, and fall in love at first sight. A large amount of our brain is dedicated to the analysis of images. We 'visualize' an outcome, we 'see' a solution, we 'outline' a plan; we 'speculate', 'imagine' and 'foresee' etc. Ask any advertiser how powerful images are to humans.
  3. I don't really know. I do treat people differently based on whether they smile or acknowledge my eye contact (I'm talking about total strangers here). I make a point of always smiling (not grinning or anything but just a quick smile and eye contact) at people in the public/working environments. If people don't respond similarly (like if they just look away or give me that really abrasive female once-over) then I will definitely be cool towards them. So I guess I do, that is based on how someone looks.

  4. i'm the exact same way.

    i know that everyone immediately judges, in their minds, it's a reflex. and i do this too. but as long as i've been aware of how hurtful it can be to treat ppl differently based on superficial things, i've attempted to fight it.

    i, for a variety of different reasons, don't go out in public looking my best. to be completely honest, most of the time i look like sh*t. and i'm not just saying that, i really do. lol. so i always treat ppl the same, regardless of what they look like because who am i? i look like crap. ppl are probably thinking horrible things about me, but i've never noticed being treated poorly.

    my default is a smile and maybe something to relate to that person, any topic it might be. and i find that most ppl will return that, despite what they might have immediately judged me on.

    i firmly believe that it's enough to smile and engage in an open and easy going conversation to get anyone to treat you well. it's not what you look that ppl will ultimately react to. once you relate to a person, even on the smallest level, the superficial stuff really does cease to matter.
  5. Why, yes, I do, as a matter of fact. If they are under 3 feet tall and sporting a diaper, I tend to not try and carry on a conversation with them.
  6. This is something that gives me a bad impression of someone. Although I know there are many people that are cool to people they don't know and then they warm up and tend to be very kind and generous, it doesn't give a good impression to be distant and unfriendly like that.
  7. It's human nature. We tend to identify with someone who is similar to ourselves, whether is be body type, clothing, whatever.

    I try to be as open-minded as possible, but I know that I am guilty.
  8. :lol: I do .. and they love the attention^

  9. Nope...never. I treat the homeless man on the street who doesn't smell too well the same way I treat my boss.
  10. I've read many things about this sort of topic and have interviewed a few people as well.

    People are judgmental period. Only the blind can really be granted immunity on this as in a way their blindness is a blessing.

    Here's an example I personally know of. A girl lives her whole life dressed 'normally' [ie as any Western woman]. Then one day, when she's much much older she wears a headscarf for religious reasons. That girl had never experienced any form of racism her entire life but the moment that small piece of fabric was covering her head...she began to see the world in a whole different -- and far more ugly -- light.

    Another example. I had a Muslim friend travelling in a major city in the US. So her and her hubby are talking to this cab driver and casually ask him questions about the Muslims in this city. That guy went on a verbal tirade about them and made it very clear what he thought about them [I'll spare you the nasty details]. Little did the fella know that my friend who is of a VERY fair appearance and doesn't dress in a religious way was in fact, a practicing Muslim [save for her attire].

    I also sat with a girl once who had a very bad physical disfigurement on her face and I admit I did my best not to stare. She spoke to me a lot about her condition and it broke my heart. She is the kind of person who could write volumes on this topic.

    As someone said earlier, we live nowadays in a very appearance-based society, make no bones about it. And if you happen to live in an area where you stand out -- for whatever reason -- only then can you truly speak about such a topic.

    Here in Australia, especially in Melbourne, many Indian students have been killed or viciously attacked over the last year. The thing which amuses me is how all the commentators, police officials and politicians who claim that there is no racism here are actually of Anglo-Saxon backgrounds.

    I find it highly 'amusing' that people with white skin who never get taunted over their name or the way they dress, feel they have a right to talk about racism or in this case: a supposed lack thereof.

    For me it's like, if you haven't walked in my shoes, don't pretend that you have.
  11. Typical me to waffle on.

    But in answer to the original question I will admit I do make judgment calls. I live in the inner-city and there are a lot of pubs in my area. And as a result I see and hear a lot of disgusting thing. People when they are drunk can very abnoxious and in the case of my city, Melbourne, they can be very dangerous too.

    For that reason I have a strong aversion to people who drink. I abhor their behaviour, I detest seeing empty bottles in my street and on our beautiful lawns and I go almost postal when I see women so enebriated they cannot walk and can barely hail a cab.

    And when I see a man taking a leak in my lane-way, I would gladly like to shoot his apendage off. I have NO problem with a dog who needs to pee publicly but I strongly object to a grown 'man' doing so.
  12. If you behave like an animal, I will mostly likely treat you like one. I kind of pre-judge as humor, like I will say he looks like he has a body in his trunk. My behavior towards someone has nothing to do with how they look. It is how they behave towards me.
  14. I think its something many people outgrow, hopefully as they get older. But if they don't its only a reflection on them.
  15. #15 Jan 27, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2010
    I think I do.
    But I like the posts with the pictures. I think they're fun.its hard to treat someone I've never met and will never meet differently, or even look at them differently in any way. But in reality I have to admit I do this with people I see but have never met. I truly believe that everyone is guity of this to some extent, concisously or unconcisously. Its human nature. But once I meet them, what they look like doesn't matter anymore. I treat them based on the kind of person they are.