"Do you forgive me?" - How do YOU end an argument?

  1. Louislady's thread: http://forum.purseblog.com/general-discussion/relationship-question-144009.html got me to thinking....

    What do YOU (or your SO) do to bring an argument to a close??

    After any argument--small or large--my SO will (after we've both cooled down a bit) invariably apologize, then ask me "Do you forgive me?" :crybaby:

    Which always brings my sulking up short.....because now the decision to end or extend :boxing: the negativity from the argument feels like it is soley on my shoulders.

    It's a smart move on his part, because if I say "Yes" -- I have to hold myself to that or I'm a liar. :angel: (LOL) And if I say "No" then I'm the one hanging onto the bad feelings, and it becomes my fault we're both still miserable. (heh)

    Still... the question does help me weigh whether or not the argument was a "deal breaker" and worth calling it quits...because anything short of that can be worked out.

    Yup, he's clever that way.... :graucho:
  2. LOL! I always say "I'm sorry". It seems to tick people off, and from what you wrote I now know why.. hehe
  3. He always either really gives me the cold shoulder, I start crying and playing the guilt card and he comes around... if it doesnt get THAT bad.. he just hugs me and is like "c'mon, lets start over..."
  4. lol - mine does the "do you forgive me" thing sometimes, too, junk... very sly!

    He also says, "can we pretend it's X minutes ago and start all over?"
  5. In an argument, I'm normally the one giving him the cold shoulder and he's trying to mend things. I'm as stubborn as a mule, so I can go days. lol I think he would die of shock if I ever initiated the make-up process. Anyhow, to answer your question, he will normally ask "are we cool", or something like that. =)
  6. Jokes...horseplay...whatever we can do to get each other to laugh! Before that, I'll reason with him, because SO is notorious for turning really small things into ridiculous arguments, due to his stress level. But he recognizes the absurdity of it later, because I'll get him to laugh ^_^
  7. Dn't sweat the small stuff.....just let it go:smile:
  8. I agree:drinks:
  9. Thanks for the tip...niether I nor my DH uses, "Do you forgive me?" But now that I know about it I am going to! LOL...
    See? This is why I LOVE TPF!
  10. We don't fight. :shrugs:
  11. ever?
  12. we usually spend like maybe a day with no contact (if the argument is serious) then one of us will cave in and contact the other. but we're both pretty stubborn and full of pride where we wont exactly apologize and if we do, we dont really mean it lol. then we forget about it within a week and move on
  13. my husband is the master of ignore - in all its lovely variations - so I go and play nice again. he keeps telling me to leave him alone but really doesn't want that - i did that once and it didn't go down well.

    i have gotten good at biding my time now about making a point - a head on argument is only on if it is very serious. it is just too draining and time-consuming.
  14. I'm the cold-shoulder-giver. I hate myself for it, but I can't help it! He always has to apologize...oh man, I am a cold *****! I apologize back, though, and we hug it out. Making up is sweet :heart:.
  15. i almost always say sorry, but i think it is a good idea to ask for forgiveness... it kinda seals the deal that it is over...