Confronting a Fake...
- Thread starter Skittle16
- Start date
If someone did that to me, I have to say that I would feel horrible and embarassed. I just don't think it's anyone's place to do something like that in public.
:s
:s
She was being obscene while she was at the bar. Her two friends were there before her, very loudly laughing and pointing around the room, then she came in throwing the purse on the bar and making a scene w/ the bartender. I said what I did on my way out, and she responded w/ a blank face; nothing else.
There is a significant difference between being an advocate for designer items and being a jerk looking to embarass someone. You have to ask yourself "Why did I say that.."
Was it really because you wanted to advocate trademark
rights?
Or Was it because she annoyed you with her boisterious behavior and you wanted to take a jab at her and run?
Unless you know them, I would bite my tongue, and even then, I just might do so anyway.
it was both, but I didn't think the later posted part mattered as this is not a forum for how to call someone out whose being obscene.
I am not a mean-natured person, truly I'm not, but I felt offended by both aspects; esp the trademark issuses. And I'm just looking for some guidance and secondary opinions as to fakes and how others felt about them. I have since learned that it is not at all my place, and I need to de-sensitize my issue w/ knock-offs.
It's all a matter of understanding what is tolerable to her may not be tolerable to you.
Better to try and have someone see it your way rather than piss them off.
I would reserve the "fake" talk for your friends. Strangers are more likely to get offended and tell you to mind your business.
I used to buy and carry fakes but over time I realized that I wanted to contribute to the designer themselves and not the people making the fakes. I feel that I'm worth the real thing. But I never would have known what I know now without reading it here. Exposing someone in public will not make them change their ways. Shame doesn't work in our society. Education however does so hopefully people will get more educated about fakes and decide, like I did, not to carry them any longer. So, take your passion for the real thing and your aversion to fakes and educate someone, gently!
Edit: By someone I mean a friend, a boyfriend, your mom... not someone you've never met before! LOL! My hubby knows all about fakes now and why I am now opposed to them!
Edit: By someone I mean a friend, a boyfriend, your mom... not someone you've never met before! LOL! My hubby knows all about fakes now and why I am now opposed to them!
I think most of us are with you and feel just as you do about fakes. This is a forum where you will get a lot of support as far as your views regarding fakes go and it's a great place to come and vent! Maybe save the venting for us and walk away when you see fakes in public.
ITA with Rose..just vent privately or to us here. Confronting someone like that will pretty much never get you a desired outcome. Besides, you don't know what they might do to retaliate.
do not, i repeat, DO NOT approach anyone to lecture them about their bag - because that's what you're doing, even if you think telling them about your bag's superior craftsmanship is the 'polite' option - it's NOT.
in either situation the girl would have every right to WHACK you with her big fake bag. hell, if i was within earshot, i'd probably grab my big REAL bag and whack you with it.
just like it's RUDE to 'politely' approach a woman and tell her that her breast implants make her breasts look obviously fake and you're worried about her self image, it's RUDE to tell someone that their bag is fake and they should only buy real ones for whatever reason, even if you try to do it 'politely' - the action is inherently RUDE and NOT CLASSY, and therefore cannot be done politely. it's not any of your business, no matter how sensative you are to copyright issues. there are plenty of writers, musicians, designers, artists, and craftsman out there that manage to not make an ass out of themselves in public. JOIN THEIR RANKS.
i'm sorry, i know i'm probably not being as tactful as i could be about this, but this is such and EGREGIOUS breach in ettequite that you should be embarrassed for your bad behavior - just remember, the other girl wasn't the ONLY one shouting assanine things in that bar that night - YOU WERE TOO, if you said what you said.
in either situation the girl would have every right to WHACK you with her big fake bag. hell, if i was within earshot, i'd probably grab my big REAL bag and whack you with it.
just like it's RUDE to 'politely' approach a woman and tell her that her breast implants make her breasts look obviously fake and you're worried about her self image, it's RUDE to tell someone that their bag is fake and they should only buy real ones for whatever reason, even if you try to do it 'politely' - the action is inherently RUDE and NOT CLASSY, and therefore cannot be done politely. it's not any of your business, no matter how sensative you are to copyright issues. there are plenty of writers, musicians, designers, artists, and craftsman out there that manage to not make an ass out of themselves in public. JOIN THEIR RANKS.
i'm sorry, i know i'm probably not being as tactful as i could be about this, but this is such and EGREGIOUS breach in ettequite that you should be embarrassed for your bad behavior - just remember, the other girl wasn't the ONLY one shouting assanine things in that bar that night - YOU WERE TOO, if you said what you said.
Really yall, you've been very sweet and helpful, and by your doing so, I realized that I wasn't being that way to her at all.
I am new to this forum and am more thankful for it everytime I use it. I really do appreciate this and what yall've said. But I need to go to bed, hopefully I'll have some more to read later. Thanks!
I am new to this forum and am more thankful for it everytime I use it. I really do appreciate this and what yall've said. But I need to go to bed, hopefully I'll have some more to read later. Thanks!
Wow, I can't believe you humiliated that poor woman.
While many of us here on this board dislike the idea of fakes, most of us would not be so rude as to hurt someone's feelings. Quite a few of us who own authentic bags have had to deal with assinine people who thought it was their duty to tell us that our bags were fake (when they obviously were not.) Just as another person on this board previously stated, a person with tact would never tell another woman that she was too fat to wear skinny jeans, or too old to wear mini skirts, etc., so why feel compelled to do so about a fake bag? Also, I'm not entirely sure that I believe your actions were driven by your dislike of trademark infringement, but more by this woman's behavior.
While many of us here on this board dislike the idea of fakes, most of us would not be so rude as to hurt someone's feelings. Quite a few of us who own authentic bags have had to deal with assinine people who thought it was their duty to tell us that our bags were fake (when they obviously were not.) Just as another person on this board previously stated, a person with tact would never tell another woman that she was too fat to wear skinny jeans, or too old to wear mini skirts, etc., so why feel compelled to do so about a fake bag? Also, I'm not entirely sure that I believe your actions were driven by your dislike of trademark infringement, but more by this woman's behavior.
Times like that I would ask myself this question: "What can I gain from doing this?"
The answer in your situation, NOTHING.
We have to pick our battles, and that was really, by far, far from anything worth your time or effort- and really just made you look silly?! I mean, who cares if the person next to you has a fake- you have a bag you love, and that is all that matters. In that situation, you should just worry about yourself, not the lady in the bar.
I'm glad you see what you did is wrong, and really just learn from the mistake of this situation. The gal will get over it.
The answer in your situation, NOTHING.
We have to pick our battles, and that was really, by far, far from anything worth your time or effort- and really just made you look silly?! I mean, who cares if the person next to you has a fake- you have a bag you love, and that is all that matters. In that situation, you should just worry about yourself, not the lady in the bar.
I'm glad you see what you did is wrong, and really just learn from the mistake of this situation. The gal will get over it.