Chinese Wedding - Name for Arms Linking Toast?

M

maddog

Mmmkay
O.G.
Jan 29, 2008
1,573
1
#1
Please help! The people on the wedding forum I'm on aren't too quick at responding so I'm seeking help here.

My SO and I are doing the arms linking toast during the wedding ceremony after signing the marriage license, which means I need to include it in our wedding program since SO's side is not Asian and I want to do the more traditional version of this ritual, so most people will have no clue what it's going on.

Is there an official name for this ritual that I can put into the program? If you don't know of a formal name, which of the following sounds best?

- Chinese Wedding Cups (was a title in a website)
- Chinese Wedding Wine Ceremony
- Chinese Wedding Vow (since it is technically the formal Chinese wedding vow)
- Chinese Wine Exchange

The reason I'm distinguishing it as a Chinese wine ritual is because most of guests are Jewish and I don't want people getting confused when it's not what they expect.

Anything other suggestion is welcomed.

I need to tell our officiant soon since he seems to be confusing it with the Jewish ritual too. TIA!
 
#3
I'm not sure if there is an official name for it, but my advice would be to call it whatever you want (I like "Chinese Wine Ceremony") and then explain the significance of it in a few short sentences.

It will gives guests something interesting to read instead of just a list of what to look for.
 
#4
The English is making the circle complete or completing the circle and the pinyin is tuan yuan.

Happy Wedding!

This would be a really good thread, for people to tell the different customs from around the world, like breaking shortbread over the bride's head, hiding the groom's shoes, jumping the broom, etc so people could have a sort of cafeteria, and pick customs they liked as if they were pastries on a cart!
 
#5
lol Shimma! Wedding a la Carte?

I noticed the Completing the Circle name on a non-Chinese website today too, but I have been hesitant since I've never heard the term tuan yuan being used for this ritual in Chinese, and I can't figure out why it's called completing the circle, since it means everything coming full circle, which I don't see in a wedding.

Vanessa - do you mind giving me the pinyin? I don't think the officiant will say it in pinyin, but maybe I'll put it in bracket in the program.

Jan228 - thanks! I will definitely add a short explanation in the program.

Likewise, I need to add explanations for all the Jewish stuff we're doing too but since there are so many interpretations for some of it, I get confused what is appropriate since our wedding is obviously going to be rather secular.

I certainly don't mind if people want to jump in and talk about different customs. They're all so interesting.

Here's an interesting one from the Chinese side that I didn't know about: I gotta buy my older brother a pair of pants! Apparently since I'm getting married before him and thus overriding him, the tradition is that I have to go under a pair of new pants I get for him, but we're skipping that bit and just buying him some jeans!

Everyone else, feel free to share! (even though I can't change the title of the thread I don't think.)
 
#6
It is the arms that make the circle, and the little red thread!

and yes Wedding A la Carte is the perfect thing to call it!

In fact, you can apply the same principle to your whole life!
 
#7
OK, the Chinese writing is 合緊交杯, and I believe the pinyin in Cantonese is "hap gan gaau bui" and mandarin pinyin is "he jin jiao bei" I think maybe you can put the Chinese characters in as well, would be quite nice..

Wishing you all the best for your wedding! :heart:
 
#9
So what should I do to the person who told me the pinyin was tuan yuan?

(I do not have silly string on hand, but there is some Redi-whip in the fridge, I think)
 
#10
lol! Shimma, I'm glad you told me that one too! It's good to know. :smile: I assume it's called different things in different parts of China, that's the likeliest reason in my mind. I do know what tuan yuan means in character; I just don't know why a wedding or marriage is considered coming full circle, which is why I'm hesitant to say that because people will ask and I'll be like "I don't know why". I may include the tuan yuan part into the explanation in the wedding program though. You're a great help!

Now I need to find explanations for a secular seven blessings and breaking the glass for the Jewish traditions. Although I love the symbolism of a chuppah, we aren't actually allowed to have one since I haven't converted and therefore have a thing that looks sorta like one but not really, and although I would like to incorporate the meaning into the program, it seems I shouldn't since we can't even have one. :sad: Phooey.
 
#11
maddog said:
...I just don't know why a wedding or marriage is considered coming full circle...
Click to expand...
The full circle thing is almost universal as a symbol somewhere in marriage customs, in the west it is the wedding ring that symbolizes the eternal and infinite nature of love, because the circle has no beginning and no end.
 
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