Chanel mommies fun time!

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#76
Honey, Rome wasn't built in a day, remember?

You are off to a good start since this early on you are already intuitive and insightful enough to examine your future based on life choices you are about to make, and mindful enough in re-examining your past to have a better understanding of why your beliefs are what they are now. Way ahead of the game IMO...I didn't have an epiphany about all this until after I got married and already had babies. That's when I realized I did what I did(chose what I chose, do what I do) to compensate for what I perceived lacking in my own growing-up-with-growing-pain years. Who are we proving our point to--our mothers, or ourselves?

Eventually you will live with the decisions you make, so make them for yourself and not for anyone else's benefit(ok, mind you I'm not preaching selfishness, rather living with conviction, k?).
 
#77
cuteangel7777 said:
schol-- thanks for dropping by and sharing your story too... what you say is really true.. i feel it too.. i think thats what i always wanted.. but i guess i grew up relating or loving my parents in a way of understanding them that they need to be where they are so that they will be okay and we they are working for us to be happier in later year.. but what you said is so touching... i think i really want to be a SAHM more as u tell me your reasons.. but i dont know if my future have the enough luck to hold that kind of luck.. wish me luck! i will try to decide the best when the time come and i will always remember what u guys say.. really i thank you all a lot for the advices and sharing the lessons u learned in life.. its really valueable
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You're a good egg Wai. I cannot imagine someone that young and already putting the collective good as the priority in one's life. I can also appreciate cultural distinctions, and I know Asian culture to be very filial. In psychology(which happens to be my forte:P), children are considered to be very self-centered(therefore the "mine! me!" stage and why adults teach young children the concept of sharing), so for you ta have been that considerate and understanding of your parents' ambitions and reasons behind them is really a manifestation of advanced maturity.

Ok enough quack talk...have faith in yourself, your upbringing, your family's love, and it will all turn out for the best.
 
#78
scholastican said:
You're a good egg Wai. I cannot imagine someone that young and already putting the collective good as the priority in one's life. I can also appreciate cultural distinctions, and I know Asian culture to be very filial. In psychology(which happens to be my forte:P), children are considered to be very self-centered(therefore the "mine! me!" stage and why adults teach young children the concept of sharing), so for you ta have been that considerate and understanding of your parents' ambitions and reasons behind them is really a manifestation of advanced maturity.

Ok enough quack talk...have faith in yourself, your upbringing, your family's love, and it will all turn out for the best.
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scholl thank you for being there! i guess i just wanted my parents to be happy and not add any more stress. My family has been through a lot with my mum's career, my dad's career but the worst happen when my mum's mum got alzehimer (i was her favoirte) and my dad's dad got parkinson. I guess it changed my whole life and i also grew up because of that and i understood my parents better.Thank god, they also have a lot of understanding of each other and we never had to go through adultery or other stuffs.. but DF also helped me a lot (gosh i was barely 15 when i met him- a naughty me) and he was 28 so he was pretty much my go to person for all the parents matter while my parents are away or busy with their parents and work.

of course u are not preaching selfishness-- everyone has to whats right for them and it differes from one person to another.. u re just looking out for me..

i had a talk with my parents and DF and so far we came to conclusion that they wouldnt pressure me when and where i should go back to school and my dad agree to build a nursery in between mine and his office so that i can be with my child as much as i want and DF said he will also build one in his office between my room and his room (i once worked for him before to help him with marketing stuffs-- my area of expertise) soo we can both be with kid when we are at his place too.. this is all at least 2 years away.. but i am happy u guys help me sort it out and give me the courage to talk to my family about it and it is now at a much better place than it was a few days ago..

btw-- my mum said she wants a nursery too in her office and we all were like we are not gonna let the kid go anywhere near the hospital and she got mad-- and she said she is gonna quit her job if we dont let her have the kid in her office too..

my family is really funny- all these are two year away and we are fighting for it now.. lol

p.s. thank you all so much!
 
#79
cuteangel7777 said:
fendi! i thought u work for your dad too? sorry if i am getting it wrong.. i am so sorry u are also going through the same thing as my mum.. when i was 5 months old, my mum left me to take her job posting like 200 miles from the city we live.. then after two weeks she came back a weekend and saw me super thin with just my gay butler, two nannies, aunt, grannie and daddy.. she said it made her so sad that she couldnt eat or sleep for another month and cry herself to sleep everynight- then one month hit and i got thinner and then she decided she was gonna commute the 400 miles commute and she did that for a year.. i guess liek my mum u have to really go through the hardship of leaving your child with someone else... but seems like u are doing good with it though:tup::tup::tup:
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WAI Actually I don't work at all, I am a SAHM by choice, I quit my job to take care of my kids and that's a full time job. All my family still lives in Italy and I don't get any help from my in-laws. I get a babysitter when my parents visit from Italy twice a year and my mom can watch them. Growing up I had my mom at home until I was 12 and she decided to open up a business, I remember how I missed her and I did not want my children to go through that.
Since you will be working for you dad you will have lots of options :tup:
 
#81
fendibbag said:
WAI Actually I don't work at all, I am a SAHM by choice, I quit my job to take care of my kids and that's a full time job. All my family still lives in Italy and I don't get any help from my in-laws. I get a babysitter when my parents visit from Italy twice a year and my mom can watch them. Growing up I had my mom at home until I was 12 and she decided to open up a business, I remember how I missed her and I did not want my children to go through that.
Since you will be working for you dad you will have lots of options :tup:
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wow!! so you are Italian? Oh gosh that so cool! Haha i know about not getting help from in laws-- when i was growing up- it was my mum sis and my mum's aunts and my mum's cousin and her family who took care of us when my parents are gone.. never have anyone did anything for us from daddy side.. kinda funny but true.. i guess u went through the same thing as me-- thats why i wanna be a SAHM too!
 
#83
New topic! BOBA and Yogurt!

soo i was wondering what do u guys think about yogurt and BoBa (burble tea/pearl tea). Soo i guess BOBA started a few years ago and people were in love with it or still in love with it... for me i love it- especially taro slushy.. and i think all of u must love it too!

and another thing is yogurt-- i am in love with yogurt land! I drove to san jose to eat it today cause i miss it so much ( i was in so cal last month and had it almost everyday) and i am counting down days until they open one in berkeley.. so i guess this is the new BOBA as now every where is yougrt place..

so the question is-- do u guys like it? which one is your favorite for each? and what do u think about your kids having it-- i know there are a lot of contravisal with kids having BOBA especially in singapore and asia!
 
#84
Wai: My own mother, who is now retired, was a career woman at a time when it was almost unheard of. She and my dad were both successful professionals while I was growing up, and they hired nannies to care for me and my siblings. So, many needs were met, and I was safe, but I defintely missed out on a nurturing, first-rate, loving relationship with my mom. There was always a wall between us, and many unresolved issues. No matter what you read or hear, that is something one never fully "recovers" from. I love my Mom (and my Dad) and we've moved on with our lives; my DH is terrific, and the Grace of God has been a balm to my soul; but I definitely wanted to be a SAHM (though I am a CPA just like Sophie) and be very involved with our children's lives from day one.

Okay, now I'm off of my soapbox.
Let's discuss the new topic --- BOBA and Yogurt!


 
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#85
True*Fidelity said:
Wai: My own mother, who is now retired, was a career woman at a time when it was almost unheard of. She and my dad were both successful professionals while I was growing up, and they hired nannies to care for me and my siblings. So, many needs were met, and I was safe, but I defintely missed out on a nurturing, first-rate, loving relationship with my mom. There was always a wall between us, and many unresolved issues. No matter what you read or hear, that is something one never fully "recovers" from. I love my Mom (and my Dad) and we've moved on with our lives; my DH is terrific, and the Grace of God has been a balm to my soul; but I definitely wanted to be a SAHM (though I am a CPA just like Sophie) and be very involved with our children's lives from day one.

Okay, now I'm off of my soapbox.
Let's discuss the new topic --- BOBA and Yogurt!
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that is so truee.. when i am mad at my mum.. all these stuffs come back to mind and i feel unloved or something like that.. and i tend to blame my mum for it even though it wasnt entirely her fault.. me and my mum are more like friends or i am more like her mom since she lost her mum to alzehimer and i am like a mum to my sis and she is like the cool big sis who buys us stuffs.. soo i guess those issue doesnt totally "recover" i know she loves me so much and she is my mum but it always happen.. it never recovered!
 
#87
True*Fidelity said:
Wai, when is your birthday? You said this is your birthday month. Mine is on the 11th (don't ask how old ;))
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mine is on 30th!
my cousin's is on 11th also
and my sis and df are on 9th
my grannie is on 19th
my DF mom is on the 13th
and both of my bffs are on 24th!and many moree..
so what are u getting for your birthday? something chanel i believe?
 
#88
True*Fidelity said:
Wai: My own mother, who is now retired, was a career woman at a time when it was almost unheard of. She and my dad were both successful professionals while I was growing up, and they hired nannies to care for me and my siblings. So, many needs were met, and I was safe, but I defintely missed out on a nurturing, first-rate, loving relationship with my mom. There was always a wall between us, and many unresolved issues. No matter what you read or hear, that is something one never fully "recovers" from. I love my Mom (and my Dad) and we've moved on with our lives; my DH is terrific, and the Grace of God has been a balm to my soul; but I definitely wanted to be a SAHM (though I am a CPA just like Sophie) and be very involved with our children's lives from day one.

Okay, now I'm off of my soapbox.
Let's discuss the new topic --- BOBA and Yogurt!
Click to expand...


Hi True*Fidelity! Glad to see you here as well as the main mommy thread. That's so funny..... you remember I was a CPA. Technically, I still am because I still hold a valid CPA license, but I'm not really practicing at the moment. I do work some hours for a small CPA firm during tax season to maintain my license but that's the extend of my job. Nowadays, I work for a builder for new home sales.....done it for the past 4 years on a super full time basis of 60 hours a day. Currently, I'm working for them on a part time basis to spend time with my children. The slow down in the real estate market had done me a favor, though somehow I don't think this part time position will last much longer. My boss wants me to go back full time to sell a new community for the next 2-3 years. But this time around, I'm going to balance my life more.
 
#89
BOBA and Yogurt. I like BOBA with Thai ice coffee and tea and even red bean drink. One day I would like to try it with coconut milk, though that's the extend of milk. I don't like milk or anything with milk product unless I can't taste the milk, so definitely no yogurt for me. :yucky: Cheese is the worst. I dislike all cheese. Am I the very few who dislike cheese? I know 3 who don't like cheese either.
 
#90
^ i used to be like that too when i was in burma.. i used to not eat a lot of stuffs and i had the comfort of refusing stuffs and getting what i want.. since i got here i eat everything lol! i dont think people are into that much of BOBA or yogurt! soo new topic again!

today i was thinking about my kid pictures (pics of me when i was 3) because a friend of mine want to use them for some baby stuffs advs.. and i was like sure.. u can use themm and my mum really treasure those... then i saw R's kids pics and i thought-- we could do that here and we wouldnt get into trouble for putting up kid pics.. soo i guess-- my dear mummies lets show of your kids..
i will post my pics once i find the right cd where i store them!
 
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