Are You A Helicopter Parent ?

Jan 23, 2006
15,877
19
New York New York
A helicopter parent is a term for a person who pays extremely close attention to his or her child or children, particularly at educational institutions. They rush to prevent any harm from befalling them or letting them learn from their own mistakes, sometimes even contrary to the children's wishes. They are so named because, like a helicopter they hover closely overhead, rarely out of reach whether their children need them or not.


Are you a helicopter parent ? or, would you consider your parents helicopter parents ?
 

Traci

Crazy for LV
Apr 18, 2006
7,702
10
No, I'm not. But, I'm confused about this. How can they pay such close attention at educational institutions when parents are not allowed in school with their children, kwim?
 

JoeyJo21

Member
Jan 27, 2006
2,067
0
33
UK
Nope I don't have any kids but I've met a couple of helicopter parents in my time. They're the types that bring lists into the school for the teachers to explain what X's show and tell is (rather than letting him show it himself), or they'll call their 16 year old to check he crossed the road ok.

My folks have always been there for me and I appreciate that, but I'm glad they didn't wrap me up in cotton wool as much as the parents in my example as I've been able to learn a lot from my own mistakes.

Personally I think helicopter parents are sweet, at the end of the day they're only trying to do the best for their kids, and everyone has different ways of bringing up children, who am I to judge?
 

pinki682

have it! keep it!
O.G.
Sep 21, 2006
9,359
37
That is the main reason I decided not to have kids. I would have been an irritating helicopter mom.
 

anufangava

O.G.
Mar 2, 2006
1,351
2
No I am not a helicopter parent. MY siblings and I were pretty much left on our own and our mother passed away when I was 18. Nobody in the family do drugs, do not smoke or drink, graduated college and promptly worked after school. Every one is married and so far, no one is separated. So I don't think being a helicopter parent will ensure that you can raise your children better than a parent is not one.
 

alvie223

Member
Apr 24, 2006
3,131
2
What an interesting term? thank you for sharing it. aAs an educator I learn new things every day.
 

Becca4277

www.petfinder.com
O.G.
Jan 3, 2006
4,941
54
Upstate NY; too far from NYC :-(
Honestly I think I used to be....my children are only 15 months apart so I am used to watching them like a hawk. I have gotten so much better (now that they are almost 6 and 5) about letting them resolve their own issues (within reason) and not rushing to give kisses with a tumble off a bike.
 

EmilyK

Somewhat in control
Jan 7, 2007
2,483
0
I thought the title was about helicopter pilots and I got all excited.
 

twiggers

O.G.
May 7, 2006
33,070
30
Ahhh helicopter parents...heehee...a friend mine does research in schools (elementary) and sees this very often! She says that teachers are sooooo frustrated by it because they feel that they cannot do their jobs properly because the parents are always butting in. She was telling me that one teacher actually told several parents that it was her classroom and not the parents and that they needed to exert their energy somewhere else!
 

merika

Wol
O.G.
Nov 1, 2006
10,409
105
Oh, yes. My son's school has plenty of those. I think they even try to outdo each other in the amount of 'helicoptering' they do! In fact classes in my son's school prefer to select interns from college elementary education majors to help out in classroom activity (instead of parents) for this reason. Otherwise class volunteering was a bunch of complaints and counter complaints because of parents nitpicking over every single thing and not letting the teachers do what they wanted to do. Mind you this is a very good school district.

One of my friends who really wanted to volunteer was asked to join a substitute teacher's program and come to school as a substitute teacher rather than a parent.
 

Swanky

Admin
Admin
O.G.
Jan 12, 2006
87,265
9,455
no, I'm not one.
But I wanted to comment, that at most schools, at least here anyhow, parent's are welcome anytime, anyday.
I spend a lot of time at my DD's school, but not watching her work, but volunteering. I peek into her room when I'm there to smile at her and I've never seen parent's in there.
 

katheryn

O.G.
Jul 19, 2006
1,108
7
^My mom vounteered at my school, too. But she definitely wasn't a helicopter parent! She says there are a lot of parents like this, who come in and complain about everything. There was one mother who came in because her son didn't get some award and she wanted detailed documentation as to why! It's just elementary school, and I am sure the kid is enjoying his summer and doesn't even care. I am sure she just wanted to brag about it and was mad when she couldn't.
 

HauteMama

.
O.G.
Sep 22, 2006
11,565
869
I definitely am not a helicopter parent in regards to school or learning from their mistakes. I very much support the teachers in whatever disciplinary action they feel is necessary. I also volunteer a lot at school, but I am not there to watch my children work or check up on a teacher.

While children are young, however, it is necessary to hover. In parks and on playgrounds and even in one's own backyard, there is always the threat of injury or wandering off or even abduction. So while I don't rush them to intensive care for every bump or bruise, I am always present within eye and earshot when they are playing outdoors.