I'm going the financially independant route, I figure I've been nothing but a money sink while my parents raised me, so the least I could do is pay for school and my own personal items. I don't expect my parents to support me, but I know that they would if I ever asked them.
afraid of my future,... opinions needed
- Thread starter tan2
- Start date
Eskimo said:
maybe u'll worry more as u grow up..i wasnt really concern about my future either when i was still at highschool,..
*how i wish to go back to that time..*i know its fine for my parents to help me financially even after i graduate, or i can work for em (&get paid) until i settled.. but i wont be satisfied w that.. i've got more than enough from them, n i really hope i can make em proud n dont want them to pay me for helping them.. hopefully i can do that
btw, good luck for your sr year n then ur pre med n med school eskimo
toiletduck said:
we have the same kind of mom here
except she prefers to buy for herself than buying me a bag
but i can borrow them almost anytime. we also shares jewelries n some clothesn i'm also almost sure i'll never be financially independent if i want to continue living the lifestyle i'm used to livin
tan2 said:thxx, yes i'm sure i will, *thinking about it is such a nightmare, but i have to get through it someday
btw its nice that you can save up for your own bags!! i'm such a shopaholic that i always fail to do that, im easily tempted to buy something
Well, it sure as hell wasn't easy saving up for them ( esp. when my family pays me pittance
ush
but it makes every bag extra special and thrilling when I pay for them at the boutique! 
I'm sure it'll work out fine for you and your parents would be proud of you if they knew what you thought.
I'm in a different situation. My parents never really bought me anything so there was no desire for me to have more or anything. I wore hand-me-down clothes from cousins. I didn't own a purse until I was in college and it was also a hand-me-down. I worked throughout college and saved my own money to buy what I want. I hate having the feeling that I owe people something whether they just treat me out for lunch or what not. I always stick money back into their pockets or give them a gift later on.
You will feel teh satisfaction of spending the money you earn. Good luck!
You will feel teh satisfaction of spending the money you earn. Good luck!
tan2 said:actually if you count helping parents is a real job, i do lots of design for my dad's dental lab n mom's dental clinic until now n never ask for any rewards from them.
but i never consider em a job coz i'm doing it for my parents. i'd love to help my parents, i'll work for em w/o being paid, but i dont really want to "work" for my parents, coz imo its a different story from standing on your own feet n make your own big money than just getting job from your parents company..
my parents already provide me w lots of love, care, n materials, i want to give them more when i grown up. i'll help em w/o paid, still i'd give em gifts (eventho i know they can get em by themself & wont need money from me)
am i being too idealistic?
Well, I work just as hard as our other workers do; get paid just as much; get screwed over with the schedule just as much; AND get screamed at just as much. So yes, I do consider it a real job. There is not one HINT of nepotism at this job of mine. I'm a bit offended that you even insinuated that "it's not a real job", as you don't know me, nor what I do. Also, I AM standing on my own two feet and have been for quite some time; you were very presumptuous to say the things you did here.
RobbieNEmmy said:
Uhh, she's from Indonesia, you can tell her English isn't on the same level.. and there's a small cultural gap, she has a different family perspective.
Oh, also, if you're working for your parents, like it or not, you are never going to avoid the 'nepotism' label.
You know, I was having exact same thoughts the other day! What would happen when I'm on my own? I live with my parents now and even though they haven't bought me a single piece of clothing, shoes, bags, etc. in more than 5 years now, they do pay for food, rent and other daily expenses. I worked full-time while going to school full-time for most of my college years and was able to support my habit that way. But when I get a job and move out, I'll have to think of rent, food, car payments, gas money, etc. on my own!!!!! It's just scary. That is why I never buy trendy stuff...in case I won't be able to afford another designer bag for a while, at least, I'll have my timeless LV Speedy and Chanel Classic Flap bag to last a LOOOOONG time! 
classwhore said:
I know I cannot avoid the "label", but I sure do not receive ANY nepotism. As I said to her, you do not know ANYTHING about me when I work; you do not know ANYTHING about the conditions under which I work, so you have no right at all to make any insinuations or really say anything about it. I responded to this thread to share my view, not to justify my means of making money.
My life was totally different growing up. My father had all the money and when he left us (I was 14) we bare had enough to put me through school, especially since I couldn't get loans since he was unwilling to sign the divorse papers still (and his income was too great for me to get a loan.
I was the only girl I knew of my friends that did not get a driver's license at 16. My mother said, "when you have the money to buy yourself a car AND the insurance, then you can have a driver's license." She dropped me off at my University every day. Talk about sad... But I was the proudest person when I purchase a BRAND NEW car, paid in FULL. It was the sweetest satisfaction. For years afterwards, all I heard about were my friends whining about their car payments, etc...
It taught me so much. I plan ahead for what I want now, just like the car. Not getting it sooner, didn't kill me, when I got it I appreciated it so much more.
I wish I had wealthy parents. I had a business plan for my own company since I was about 20 but not money to back it up. It has taken me 10 years to finally get started on what I dreamed about for years! Since all you girls have parents that are willing to support you, why don't you use that to your advantage and theirs. Do you know how much I wished my mother could have backed my company up. That is how Vera Wang started.
Why not think about what you would love to do. Make a business plan and tell your parents "I don't want to live on your money forever. I would like to start my own business with your helkp. I am interested in importing.... shoes (whatever)." If I do the research will you help me finance it?"
I am sure they would jump at the chance to help you spread your wings and become independent and successful than to just keep buying you your handbags!
Good luck!! You all have a wonderful future ahead of you. Don't worry... rather use your energy and focus on how you will succeed on YOUR OWN, whether it's a job you want to get or an idea you want to execute. It will be the most rewarding thing you can do for yourself. Dream big! But make sure to act on them!
I was the only girl I knew of my friends that did not get a driver's license at 16. My mother said, "when you have the money to buy yourself a car AND the insurance, then you can have a driver's license." She dropped me off at my University every day. Talk about sad... But I was the proudest person when I purchase a BRAND NEW car, paid in FULL. It was the sweetest satisfaction. For years afterwards, all I heard about were my friends whining about their car payments, etc...
It taught me so much. I plan ahead for what I want now, just like the car. Not getting it sooner, didn't kill me, when I got it I appreciated it so much more.
I wish I had wealthy parents. I had a business plan for my own company since I was about 20 but not money to back it up. It has taken me 10 years to finally get started on what I dreamed about for years! Since all you girls have parents that are willing to support you, why don't you use that to your advantage and theirs. Do you know how much I wished my mother could have backed my company up. That is how Vera Wang started.
Why not think about what you would love to do. Make a business plan and tell your parents "I don't want to live on your money forever. I would like to start my own business with your helkp. I am interested in importing.... shoes (whatever)." If I do the research will you help me finance it?"
I am sure they would jump at the chance to help you spread your wings and become independent and successful than to just keep buying you your handbags!
Good luck!! You all have a wonderful future ahead of you. Don't worry... rather use your energy and focus on how you will succeed on YOUR OWN, whether it's a job you want to get or an idea you want to execute. It will be the most rewarding thing you can do for yourself. Dream big! But make sure to act on them!
I grew up pretty comfortably. My parents're pretty well off, however my parents never spoiled me; they always thought me the value of money. I had to earn my allowance, so my "jobs" were things like washing the dishes, cleaning the house, washing my dad's car, typing documents for my dad, babysit my siblings, etc. Since I was little, my dad always told me that it's okay if I didn't want to work then, BUT the day I graduated from college, he would cut me off financially. Because I knew this, it forced me to work real hard toward my goals. Don't get me wrong, I was always afraid that I was not going to find a job that would pay enough to support myself. Thankfully enough, a month before I graduated from college, I was given a job offer I just coudln't refuse.
I guess what I'm saying is don't worry too much about the future, just work hard towards your goals... things tend to work out for the best...
I guess what I'm saying is don't worry too much about the future, just work hard towards your goals... things tend to work out for the best...
iliabags i can kinda relate to your car thing....my mother drops me off at school every day (it can get irritating but i adore her and i know it's a pain in the butt for her as well) and i still don't have my license yet....iliabags said:
as for the future, i've always worked as well (i've been tutoring/teaching since i was 13) but i never spent a cent of what i earned.....my parents put it all into savings and stuff but working definitely teaches you the value of money......i've received a few gifts from my parents as high school/college graduations parents, but alot of the things i have i got through sacrificing (skipping meals, not spending on a lot of others things i wanted, majorly saving every little bit of spending money
)........i'd consider my parents to be very well off, but they do enough for me in paying for my education and i really don't want to develop the habit of getting everything i want right now, because i'd rather my parents keep their money for themselves, and also because it's just bad for my future and my own spending habits....my parents have offered to buy me a car but i really don't want to put that kind of burden on them, and it's the same thing with bags.......my mother's the kind of person who'll get me something expensive but won't spend on herself, but i'd rather she does spend the money on herself (but she won't of course....so a few months ago i saved up $1000 to buy myself a bag and gave it to her)i guess what i'm saying is i try to pay for things on my own right now because although i know i'll be making a good amount when i graduate from law school, i don't wanna be the kind of person who's so used having her parents buy her bags that she can't control her own spending......i want to be able to have enough money to support my kids in whatever they choose to do, since that's what my parents did for me, and that means lots and lots of savings
ush:and tan2 i think you'll be fine.......once you start making money it's like a major reality check and you start to realize just how hard you worked for the amount you're spending, and it really makes you reevalute what you choose to spend your money on