A lurker out of the shadows seeking advice - Tiffany Diamond By the Yard DBTY gift?

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  1. Total lurker here, stepping out of the shadows in desperate needof some advice!! Dear all fashion/jewelry savvy ladies of tPF, can you pleaseshare your opinions? Any thoughts are welcome and so much appreciated :tup:

    The Situation:
    I’ve been on a hunt for a jewelry gift for my mom’s upcomingbirthday in June (I know I know…crazy planner, guilty as charged). So far thetop contender is Tiffany’s Diamond by the Yard (DBTY) necklace in platinum or rosegold. Second runner up is a non-branded DBTY style necklace, which I’d probablychoose Whiteflash Verismo if I ended up going this route.

    Little Family Background:
    My parents got divorced 3 years ago and I’m the only childin the family. My dad has since remarried a woman 10 years+ my senior, and my momhas not been with (or even seen) any men since my dad. My dad’s new life is in anothercountry, and my mom and I are both in the States, not living together but inthe same neighborhood and we’re very close.

    During the 30 years my parents were together, dating +married, my dad didn’t buy her much jewelry except for a few small things (non-branded,no certificate, nothing > $500). And we’re a middle class family so moneywasn’t the issue. I just saw it as the way he was. Am I naïve that I was surprised to find out hisnew wife already has a Tiffany’s necklace and a non-branded diamond ring? Iknow we’re all adults here and my dad has the right to choose how he spends hismoney, but my heart aches when I think about what it does to my mom’s feelings.

    To make things worse, a few of my mom’s heirloom jewelry thatshe inherited from her mother and grandmother (who are no longer with us), werelost during moving. The jewelry were never insured because they’re not worth alot of money (a simple white gold necklace & a solid yellow gold ring) butthe sentimental value behind those pieces is forever irreplaceable.

    My mom is a really strong person, and probably the mostselfless and kind person I know. She sacrificed a lot of her own interests forthe best outcome of the family. She’s always put me first, and has given meeverything a child could ask for (not materialistically speaking). Seriously, no amount of words can express thelevel of gratitude I feel towards her. Now that my parents are divorced, I’mthe only “family” left (her side of the family also lives overseas).

    (Thank you kindly if you’re still reading this…much love:heart:)

    My Thought Process:
    Since I’ve been working for a few years now with better disposableincome than when I was waiting tables in college, I thought why not buy my momsomething REALLY nice for her upcoming 54th birthday? :idea: Don’t get mewrong, I’ve always taken her out on her birthdays/every mother’s day, with flowersand gifts but this time I want to step it up a notch given the circumstance,you know? She’s not a flashy person at all, so I thought the simplicity andclassic design of DBTY necklace suits her perfectly. And if I get it from Tiffany’s it will be hervery first designer jewelry ever! (And if you’ve read the background section,hopefully you understand why I think she really, really deserves it!!)

    My Dilemma:
    For some odd reason, I just can’t forgo the idea of choosinga 0.54 carat stone (because she’s turning 54), or at least something in the0.50 carat range to represent a celebration of her 50’s. Part of the reason isalso because I’m toying with the idea of getting myself a 0.26 carat DBTY when Iturn 26 later this year. That way, mymom and I could have matching DBTY necklaces that represent the age/time this allhappened, and would have something to remember by. After all, isn’t that whatjewelry is? To celebrate special times, to remember the good times…etc (ofcourse I never say no to “just because” blings!!!:greengrin:smile:

    HOWEVER, the problemis Tiffany’s 0.50 carat range is soooooo darn expensive and I’m not necessaryrolling in dough at this point of my career. :shucks:I am open to buying second hand,and have been checking eBay diligently but most Tiffany DBYT necklaces listedare less than the 0.50 carat range. So far I found ONE listing but it is stillabove my price range...*sigh*

    I thought about giving up the designer route (although IREALLY, really, really don’t want to!!) and going non-branded, but neitherWhiteflash nor Goodoldgold sells stone smaller than 0.30 carat…which means I wouldn’tbe able to get my 0.26 carat DBTY necklace there, defying the whole idea of “matching”with my mom. :nono:

    My Questions:
    So here I am, kind of back to the drawing board, and stuck. Whatdo you ladies think I should do given the current situation? I still have sometime till June (although I’ve been looking since January), so in the mean timeI will be hawking over eBay like no other. I hope you guys don’t think buyingsecond-hand is tacky…I personally am the type of person who rather buy second-handthings I love if that’s the way I can afford it better, than to buy brand new somethingI’m not as crazy about.

    Thank you so much for reading…I look forward to hearing someideas!:ty:
     
  2. I cannot tell you how much pleasure it gave me to buy my mom t&c dbty necklace. And as shallow as it sounds it was important to me that it was T&C.
    I inherited that with all her other jewelry and it still gives me joy.
     
  3. I think what you are planning is incredibly sweet! I have a solitaire necklace bezel set from a nonbranded jeweler that is 0.4 carat. I showed my jeweler a pic of Tiff dbty as inspiration! I am happy with it but I do admit--it doesn't shine quite like the Tiff dbty necklaces when I walk through the store! And I also remember my first piece of Tiff jewelry. There really is nothing quite like opening your first robin egg blue box! I think that whatever you choose--you're going to knock her socks off!
     
  4. There is typically a price jump at the .5 carat mark. I believe there is an upcoming price increase at Tiffany in early March.
     
  5. I still remember the very first time I opened my first blue box :smile: If your mom never own any branded jewelry than I think this will make her really happy, not because it is Tiffany, but because you went through a lot to buy it for her and she'll know it and appreciated.
     
  6. It sounds like no matter what you get your mum will definitely be thrilled. Youve put so much thought into this and she will be very touched. I dont have any tiffany pieces myself but I have a .59ct GIA solitaire which I purchased from an established jeweler locally. With diamonds for me I dont go by brands as I dont find you get as much bang for your buck. However if you want the design, go for the Tiffany. Good luck and keep us posted!
     
  7. Have you considered Brian Gavin? Their signature diamonds are amazingly brilliant, and they will still be cheaper than Tiffany's. And they have a DBTY design just like Tiffany's m in 3 colors. That might be a better way for you to go since you want to get one for yourself as well. With BG, the price listed for the necklace just covers the setting and the chain, and then you get to select the diamond you want mounted in the setting. The more dough you have to spend, the larger/better quality stone you can buy. Although , with BG, there is really no such as a mediocre quality diamond. I think this idea you have for your mom's gift is very sweet and loving. Your mom raised you right.
     
  8. my parents went through a divorce 4 years ago with a similar situation. i'm also very close to my mom and we live 6kms apart!
    I did something very similar for my mom for her birthday after my parents separated except I gave her the tiffany diamond X signature necklace.

    I would definitely go for the tiffany dbty and forgo the idea of a half carat, the tiffany necklace will floor her and she'll never forget it!
    to this day my mom wears her signature necklace and a dbty together, these are her daily pieces that she cherishes :smile:
     
  9. I would buy her the Tiffany .5 c DBTY because that's what you really want to do. Also since you said you were going to buy a DBTY for yourself later, not at the same time, just delay it until you can afford it.
     
  10. Thank you ladies for all of your heartfelt advice! Quick update: I was able to work out a deal with the seller who had a 0.5 carat Tiffany's DBTY listed on eBay (still ended up going over budget, but with my tax return I was able to manage). Super excited I was, I paid, eagerly waited for the package, received the necklace, and was feeling really accomplished and proud of my first big gift purchase!

    I was all looking forward to uploading pictures here as an update, until I took the necklace to Tiffany's for cleaning. I asked the SA to pull the diamond stats via the serial # on the clasp, and it turned out the color and clarity were BOTH TWO grades lower than what was advertised!!!!

    I immediately contacted the seller who seemed confused to why I was concerned. Eventually she started to get upset. Long story short, I'm now caught in the ugliest PayPal dispute ever and it's draining my energy by the second...I'm thinking about starting another thread asking for advice. Every moment that goes by I'm just feeling the due date for the credit card I used to pay for this transaction approach :sad: I'm getting so nervous that I could potentially lose money. So sorry ladies for the grim update :sad:
     
  11. So sorry that this happened to you.
    You really should just send the piece back to the seller.
    After reading your posts, it seems that you are primarily upset with the amount you spent for the item you received. That you somehow overpaid (even after asking the seller for a discount). Have you checked to see what the retail price is for the item you got?
    Regardless, it seems unlikely that the seller is going to offer you any more discounts.
    Send the piece back and consider the lesson learned.
     
  12. Excellent advise!!

    Compare the same grade/quality, if what you paid is significantly less than Tiffany, will you keep it?

    If you are still not happy, just return to the seller for refund.

    There is always risks buying on eBay.
     

  13. Oh no sorry this happened to you, open a case as "Not as Described" give ALL the information possible. They almost ALWAYS side with the buyer, seriously I would say 99.9% they side with the buyer. I hope it works out for you
     
  14. It is always very pleasure to give something to mom and you are going to do that kind of thing.So best of luck.I think you should buy .5c DBTY for your mom and you might be afford it.
     
  15. I'm sorry your attempt to get your mum something so beautiful is turning into a dispute :hugs:

    Be rational, open the dispute formally with eBay and Paypal and work out what you want to do - did you really overpay for the necklace? Presumably you made some sort of saving on regular retail buying off eBay - what is the independent value for the necklace?