Can a woman be a player? (PG-13)

B

Blair Waldorf

Member
Aug 15, 2006
3,604
9
#1
Consider a girl with lots of gentleman callers. Let's say she sleeps with some of them of her own accord, for her own personal pleasure. She enjoys this lifestyle, and she doesn't allow herself to be "used" for sex. In fact, in the majority of her relationships, she is in control and less emotionally involved than her partners. She has no desire for a long-term relationship, at least not at the moment.

Is she a player or a slut?

I'd like to say she's a player, because screw the double standard. If this were a guy we were talking about, his friends would be giving him high-fives. Then again, I feel like most people would label her a slut just for being promiscuous. What do you guys think?
 
#2
Most definitely, a woman can be a player! In fact, post-divorce, during my "wild" years, I was surprised to find out from some guy friends of mine that I had a "player" rep! And this information was passed on to me with the utmost respect and admiration--I didn't sense any negative connotations at all. It was actually sort of flattering.
 
#3
she most definitely is a player :yes: i am totally with you on screwing the double standards, i am sick and tired of branding women whores just because that have the sexual drive and appetite for adventures and amount of partners that would usually be associated with men ( u should have seen my BF`s look on his face when it turned out i had 5 times more sexual partners ( is that the right term? :sweatdrop:) than he did ...he saved his a$$ though and didnt comment on it ...but the look...:cursing:
 
#4
I haven't slept with a lot of men and I don't really approve of it... (not that it matters, but anyway...)

Back to the point, I call anyone, male or female, who sleeps around a 'slut'.
 
#5
AGREED

forget about the double standards...

but yeah most ppl would call her a slut.... somehow it's just not respected when a woman sleeps with who ever she pleases. i don't know why that is... it's just the mindset that women shoouldn't be able to sleep with someone because she wants to...

love the double stands in our world.:cursing:


nerdphanie said:
I'd like to say she's a player, because screw the double standard. If this were a guy we were talking about, his friends would be giving him high-fives. Then again, I feel like most people would label her a slut just for being promiscuous. What do you guys think?
Click to expand...
 
#6
I personally think the term player has as many negative connotations as caling someone a slut be they male or female.

If a woman wants to sleep with men to suit herself and for her own pleasure then why the hell not. All this stuff about how women have to feel something for a man to sleep with them is utter tripe! Women have always been able to have sex like men but it's only becoming widely acknowledged in the last few years
 
#8
i agree, screw the double standard. I am not impressed with either male or female in that situation, but both slut and player are expressions I woulnd't use.
 
#10
I agree with most of the other ladies here. Who cares about a stupid double standard? I wouldn't consider her a slut. As long as she continues to respect herself, it shouldn't matter how many men she dates or sleeps with.
 
#11
Ok, how about Paris Hilton? How do we know she isn't in charge of every single relationship she engages in? I mean I despise her for other reasons, but one of the primary digs people make about her are that she's a slut.
 
#12
nerdphanie said:
Ok, how about Paris Hilton? How do we know she isn't in charge of every single relationship she engages in? I mean I despise her for other reasons, but one of the primary digs people make about her are that she's a slut.
Click to expand...

she spreads herpes around the world - no serious player does that ! ;) if you cant even be smart enough to use condoms esepcially sleeping with random guys you do go into a slutty category for me ;)
 
#13
nerdphanie said:
Ok, how about Paris Hilton? How do we know she isn't in charge of every single relationship she engages in? I mean I despise her for other reasons, but one of the primary digs people make about her are that she's a slut.
Click to expand...

I think no-one would care if she had multiple partners and kept it discreet. By discreet I don't mean hidden, but behave within the bounds of what is socially acceptable in terms of bodily exposure etc. Why would you want to show your vagina to the whole world?

To me Paris Hilton feel like shes just using the guys she dates just to get herself exposure (both literally AND figuratively!) And that's why I don't like her...apart from the fact that she sounds really superficial.
 
#15
Having been in this situation, I wouldn't say I am a player or slut. I am in control of every situation I put myself in. A long time ago, I got over the whole "whore vs nice girl" thing. Why is it so wrong for women to get sexual satisfaction? There is only so much a sex toy can do, although they are great. It's just ridiculous in my opinion on double standard. I also don't go bragging about my conquests.

If I am a responsible person as far as protection, then I can do whatever and whoever I see fit. My friends compare me to the attitude that Samantha from Sex and the City has. Plus most men think it is extremely sexy. I don't care about being called names. Whatever anyone decides to call me, I am sure I have been called worse at some point in my life.
 
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