Helping to Throw Baby Shower - Advice needed!

kells1983

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Dec 1, 2008
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Hi All! I need some advice.
I am helping to throw a baby shower for a friend, along with her sister. A little bit of background:

This is my friend's second child. Her first child is 8 years old, from a prior marriage. This baby shower will be co-ed, including most of her family and the new husband's family. In total, it will be about 70-75 people (she has an exceptionally large family and children will be there as well).

The couple/family are renting a space for the event, at about $175. The food will be a little over $200, plus desserts that I was going to bake/buy. The sister and I were going to buy the decorations (tablecloths, plates, napkins, etc.) and be in charge of planning games.

I also purchased a gift with a cost of about $80.

I guess my question is, in light of what I've spent (thus far about $150), should I be offering to contribute for the rental of the space or the food costs? I am unsure of the etiquette in this situation because it is such a large family party at this point. The sister is not very financially secure and is only contributing a little toward the decor/games, and not purchasing a gift.

And before anyone asks: no, she has not thrown any showers for me, as I am unmarried without children (and I would not ask for such showers in return, as I become very anxious about these types of events where I would be the center of attention). So I really have no basis for comparison. She is a good friend and I don't want to seem rude. I was thinking of just offering another $75-$100 toward the food/space - would that be acceptable?

Thanks in advance!
 
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I think you are being extremely generous. Contribute if you feel compelled, but by no means feel obligated! They are already so grateful for all of your help in planning, your baked goods, your gift, etc.
 
I don't think you need to do anything more? Have other family members or friends offered to do anything? My friend's family is my second family and anytime they have an event like this most relatives will bring a food dish, desserts and ask if they can help with decorations.
 
Not too many have offered to help. I think one of her other sisters is bringing a potato salad or other type of side dish, but really it's just been the sister and me doing all the planning.

I'm hoping someone else will help, since I feel like we've been doing a lot of the legwork (decor, games, prizes, etc.). Thanks for the insight! I just didn't want to seem rude by not contributing more. In the past, when throwing a baby shower, it was a small intimate party (about 15-20 women), so it was easier to split costs and it was hosted at a person's home. MUCH EASIER!
 
Not too many have offered to help. I think one of her other sisters is bringing a potato salad or other type of side dish, but really it's just been the sister and me doing all the planning.

I'm hoping someone else will help, since I feel like we've been doing a lot of the legwork (decor, games, prizes, etc.). Thanks for the insight! I just didn't want to seem rude by not contributing more. In the past, when throwing a baby shower, it was a small intimate party (about 15-20 women), so it was easier to split costs and it was hosted at a person's home. MUCH EASIER!

TBH, this doesn't sound like a baby shower - more like a baby mardi gras :P You're a saint helping out as much as you have!
 
TBH, this doesn't sound like a baby shower - more like a baby mardi gras :P You're a saint helping out as much as you have!

Totes! 75 people at a baby shower! Yowza! I think you've gone above and beyond the call of duty but if it is in your heart to help pay for the place then do it. But don't feel bad if you don't. I can only really offer advice on a shower on a much smaller level (20 people at the most).
 
Totes! 75 people at a baby shower! Yowza! I think you've gone above and beyond the call of duty but if it is in your heart to help pay for the place then do it. But don't feel bad if you don't. I can only really offer advice on a shower on a much smaller level (20 people at the most).

:biggrin: This baby is going to have a LOT to live up to...