I feel like I dont belong here

Couture_Girl

Couture_Girl

O.G.
Oct 24, 2006
7,224
41
#1
:shrugs: Okay.........Me and my family used to live in Southern Cali.........I was born there, laddeeda...........When I was 10, my dad got a job offer here in Northen Virginia. I have made friends, but I feel like I dont belong here.......Everyone is so laid back, and I miss almost everything in Cali........Everybody looks at me like I am from Mars whenever I talk about designers and all that stuff.......I guess I will get that look when I talk about expensive purses, but thats not the point..........I mean, yeah, there is great people who live here in Washinton DC, but I feel SO out of place and weird......I keep telling myself that once I turn 18, I am going to move back to Cali and go to UCLA....Does anybody else have this odd feeling? :sad:
 
#3
aw zoe, at first i thought you meant you did not belong here on tpf...i was gonna :lecture: bc you are a wonderful contributor to this forum.
i'm sorry VA is not like Cali and you feel less than comfortable. maybe in time, things will improve. and yes, keep a goal to go back to Cali for college--that's a terrific idea!
bf moved around growing up and although it is never ideal, it really teaches one great social skills...it makes one more adaptable. he can fit in anywhere and talk to anyone now.
cheer up and know you always have the pf as a place where you fit in!:heart:
 
#4
I was born in Edmonton, but I feel much more at home in California...which is why I spend so much time there.

You'll always live/be in situations where the majority of people have different interests, but I'm sure there are people who like the same things you do.

eta: i think going to UCLA is a really good idea...it's a great school and you would probably like it there. i thought about going there myself.
 
#5
Im sorry about the way you feel but I totally understand the feeling, I have moved around alot, and I think going back to UCLA is a great plan and it gives you a goal, something to look forward to, good luck:smile:
 
#6
I understand how you feel. I live in California for awhile (SanFran) and LOVED it. The people are SO laid back, so nice.... just wonderful. Now, I've lived all over the world; started out in Europe and landed, at 10, just outside D.C. I went to school in Europe for HS, part of college and then traveled plus lived in places due to my job and grad school. So, I don't say this without SOME proof: the Northern VA, DC and MD area is NOT the nicest place to live. People rarely set down roots. Very few are born and bred. Plus, it's political town. It's who you know and what do you do for a living. Lots of hush hush types. I've said this and virtually EVERY person who has moved to my are (between DC and Balt.) has commented that they have never met ruder people in their LIFE, then they have here in the NVA, DC, MD area.

It's not you, really it isn't. Many people HATE living here, but do so because of the job market. So, if you have the chance to go back to Cal., take it. In the meantime, take advantage of what the area has to offer. Once you leave, you may not come back again- and there are SO many GREAT things to see in and around the nations capital. Hang in there! :smile:
 
#7
Ugh I know what you mean, I'm in Southern CA and really don't feel like I fit in here either!
I'm in a "nice" neighborhood but my neighbors are not into fashion, one is into Brighton and calls Neiman Marcus "Needlessly Marked up." The people around here are so frumpy and even one lady who seems to be more up on fashion (her husband is a shoe designer, she has Chanel sunglasses, carries Coach bags) has a fake LV Damier keycase!!! :wtf:
I really wish it was more fashion oriented around here so don't feel bad, you're definitely not alone in this.
 
#8
cjj said:
Northern VA, DC and MD area is NOT the nicest place to live. People rarely set down roots. Very few are born and bred. Plus, it's political town. It's who you know and what do you do for a living. Lots of hush hush types.
Click to expand...

I agree to an extent. I reside in the area and we like it...not love it....lol. It's a wonderful area but you are right about it being a political place. It's also true that most people you meet here are not from the area. Most everyone is from somewhere else...lol. It's a great area as far as the job market. Lot's of intelligent and professional people here for certain. Many are snobby and it's all about where you live and what you do...lol. Particularly when you live in certain areas---and we live in one of them...lol. The people, I must admit, are pretty snobby here. Of course, we are not...lol. People stay to themselves pretty much. Friendly but not friendly...strange. You just learn to be the same way over time. It's a great thing that we have family and friends all up and down I-95. Those old friends and family are who we spend time with and are all that matters.
We don't plan to reside in this area forever either. We like it for now. Our boys are in great schools and we are doing great here but in the future we'd like to live elsewhere. We love Arizona and New Mexico and have considered those areas.
I understand you very well...go to Cali young woman!:P
 
#10
I understand what you are talking about. I moved back to NJ after living in Florida for over 20 years. I feel in my heart Florida is my home and hope to go back there someday...... I just don't feel the whole NJ thing. I miss the way of life I had in Florida. What is interesting about your post is that you moved when you were 10 and I would think you would have had time to adjust to your new home. I think it is great you are thinking about going to school out there. Good luck with your future plans.
 
#11
I thought you were going to say you didn't belong in tPF too! Lol.

Anyway, what you are experiencing is reverse culture shock. It's like when you move to another country, return to your home country and find out people are different, the way things work are weird etc. because you got used to the new country.

It'll take some time for you to get used to it again. If you make some friends I'm sure the integration will go faster. You can suppress your designer-loving self to fit in if you wish but if not try to find similar people - I'm sure there are some! Otherwise you will find yourself fitting in eventually anyway, it's only a matter of time. Cheer up, it happens to everyone you are not alone in this :smile:
 
#12
Couture_Girl said:
:shrugs: Okay.........Me and my family used to live in Southern Cali.........I was born there, laddeeda...........When I was 10, my dad got a job offer here in Northen Virginia. I have made friends, but I feel like I dont belong here.......Everyone is so laid back, and I miss almost everything in Cali........Everybody looks at me like I am from Mars whenever I talk about designers and all that stuff.......I guess I will get that look when I talk about expensive purses, but thats not the point..........I mean, yeah, there is great people who live here in Washinton DC, but I feel SO out of place and weird......I keep telling myself that once I turn 18, I am going to move back to Cali and go to UCLA....Does anybody else have this odd feeling? :sad:
Click to expand...

I have felt that way about the town I live in , people here worship going to Walmart, love going to mud bogging get togethers , (I think mud booging is takeing your big ass truck and driving it through swamps:confused1: ) , they all talk about getting go no where jobs and most don't go to college they would rather get preganat at 16 and live with thier jail bird boyfriend .They look at me like a alien when I talk about going to college and wanting to do things that you don't have to be drunk for like traveling or going to a play or going somewhere that is more than 15 minutes away . Its depressing and I feel trapped a lot of time but I know I will get out soon . Just keep telling yourself that better times are ahead . I am from Ann Arbor which is where the Univerty of Michigan , basically the polar oppitistte from the town in live
 
#13
cjj said:
I've said this and virtually EVERY person who has moved to my are (between DC and Balt.) has commented that they have never met ruder people in their LIFE, then they have here in the NVA, DC, MD area.
Click to expand...
I completely disagree with this statement. I live in NOVA, and compared to other places I have lived in the past, they are some of the most polite people I have lived around. It actually is a nice area.
Hang in there, couture_girl, once you turn 18 you have that freedom, Keep those goals for yourself, it's great! It the meantime, just be yourself and make an effort to meet new people, and you will fit in. :smile:
 
#14
I'm sorry you're feeling this way. We all tend to feel out of place at times.. maybe trying to find out what the other people's interests are will help. I certainly don't think you can't have ANYTHING in common with other human beings. Try to find something you can connect to and share. Maybe later on, you can share your purse love without being looked at weird. A hug!
 
#15
I felt like that for a long time after I moved to Dallas from being born and raised in southern california. But I am really starting to like Texas and i am actually thinking about buying my first home out here. :-]]

Cheer up, im sure you will start fitting in as soon as you start looking!
 
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