How much did you spend on your engagement ring?

#121
Coming from somebody who has been through way too much on this topic, and discussed this for way too long, make sure that spending that money is truly something he is comfortable doing without having a job or even graduating yet. My boyfriend and I are also early (ish) 20's and found a great local jeweler. We spent quite a bit of money (I'm not sure how much) and he designed the ring himself. I have yet to see the ring because we are waiting until he has a job to get engaged. But the difference is that he came into some money and has 6 figures in savings/investments.
We are having a diamond band made as a "place holder" of types....

Sometimes it's best to wait until you are financially stable to spend money like that on an engagement ring. These days it's very hard to find a full time job, and the last thing you want is him regretting buying you the ring of your dreams because he hasn't found a job yet. If its something you both really want, but don't want the price tag, consider getting a beautiful diamond band made and down the line you can get a ring with a main diamond. There is nothing wrong with upgrading, or doing something different to save some money.

JMHO from someone that's been through it 😊
 
#122
If I remember correctly, my engagement ring cost around $5,000. I told my hubby not to buy me a ring until he had the cash and that's what he did. I didn't want him accumulating debt for an engagement ring.
 
#123
I wouldnt allow my DH to spend more than $3K on my ring, even though he would have been fine doing so. He paid for it in cash too. Financial responsibility is most important to me because I grew up in a family with very little extra money (my mom was a single mom of the four of us and my dad who had no relationship with us was making half a million a year) and I knew that when I had my own family I was going to do whatever I had to not to be in the same situation. I personally dont need material things to make me happy but I do however want to live a life where my decisions of what I do or buy is NOT based on how much money I have I knew what I wanted and we had already talked about upgrading later. I got the Canary Yellow diamond and Pink Diamonds I wanted too and we were 27 and 28 when we got married.

I am not attacking anyone who chooses to spend more on theirs.. I just personally felt for us it wasnt the time. I have already decided Im turning my current ring into a pendant which will go to our children once I upgrade my E-ring.
 
#124
I think it all comes down to what you and your DF are comfortable with spending. Everyone's finances are different, and opinions will vary depending on one's "spending philosophy"... LOL. However, it is my opinion that one shouldn't go into a lot of debt or spread themselves too thin when it comes to purchasing a ring.

My now DH is not what one would call a jewelry connoisseur by any stretch of the imagination... But, the ring was and has always been "my thing," and he knew it was important to me. He also told me that he'd rather I didn't upgrade (yeah, right! ;) BIG MISTAKE on his part! HA!)

Since the man typically spends so much more on the ering than the woman spends on his band, I offered to purchase both bands and my setting... Even though my diamond was still more than four times the cost of all three, I felt it was a good compromise for us. Not to mention, I got to design the exact setting it wanted! hehehe

He did finance part of my stone @ 0% interest for one year, but only for the credit rewards, as he had the cash in his savings. He paid it off in less than nine months, so I didn't feel so bad! :o

So... if you communicate with your guy, all will work out. And if you decide to save now, there are always upgrades down the road if your taste changes and you *NEED* a larger stone or different setting (or both)! :biggrin:

Make sure to post lots of pics when you do get it though! :smile:
 
#125
My DH surprised me with the engagement ring. He had a white gold ring custom made by a well known goldsmith with a 0.64ct diamond. It was EUR 4.500,- (I'm not sure he knows I know :biggrin:)

When I compare that to the US prices you girls have it good! No way you can buy a good 1.00ct solitaire for under 5 to 6k here.
 
#128
ginger123 said:
http://www.businessinsider.com/why-diamonds-are-a-sham-2013-3
Click to expand...

Although I do agree with most of the historical and marketing points made in this article, the author comes across as almost ranting, not educating his readers - as I'm assuming was the point of his writing. (???) LOL

How many people buy a diamond with the intention of it being an "investment"? How many expect to turn around and sell their diamond,expecting to get their money back (or even make a profit)? ...Not many, I would assume. Although we, as consumers, take a hit buying retail, that is the case with almost 100% of all items purchased throughout our lifetimes. ...but I really LOVE my car - and my ring! :P

What CAN be done is to do your homework and buy as close to "wholesale" as you can... or at least try to educate yourself and shop competitively (unless you simply don't care to spend more than you have to... in which case, this article probably doesn't mean a lot to you anyway...)

Perfect example:
DH and I found my diamond at a place that sells to the market, cutting out the proverbial middle man. They own their own mine, sell to "market" (retailers), and only have three locations that sell to the public. On the other hand, my sister in law's DF chose to buy from an expensive local boutique, and paid almost as much for her 1.5ct than was spent on my 2.4ct stone! (both stones were GIA XXX, J, SI1 stones... so graded equally). The only difference was that we cared enough (or at least knew enough) to do our homework, making sure we got the most we could for our money - not to mention I was a lot happier than I would have been had the tables been turned! HA! ;)

Does my SIL love her ring? Of course! Does she know how much money know her DF spent? Yes. Would she be pleased if she knew he could have gotten the same stone for a LOT less (or even a LOT larger stone for the same price), ultimately saving for their home or school loan payments? Nope, she would not have been happy. Not. At. All. Would we ever tell her! NO WAY! Her fiance already feels foolish after inquiring about my ring - we would never want his bride to be upset as well! :eek: But... I can about guarantee her soon-to-be husband will not feel the need to shop at that same store, or even at retail for that matter!

Point being (yes, I have one - sorry for such a long post! ): everyone will almost certainly pay way more than what a diamond is "worth" per se, but they CAN research and try to pay lower premiums than those added by most jewelry houses/jewelry stores. ;)

BTW, it would really suck to be the author's wife, IMHO... I mean, this is TPF - I love diamonds!

*thanks to anyone who made it through my lonnnggg post! :smile:
 
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#129
I think the author's point is that the very desire for a diamond engagement ring was created by aggressive marketing, and many women don't question it--which is fine if one can afford it, but regrettable if it means starting a marriage with debt. And regardless, when it reaches the point of obsession or fetishizing, it's a bit odd.
 
#130
I'll admit I read only a little bit, but the fact that they are saying when you leave it loses 50% of its value is ridiculous. It 100% depends where you purchase. My jeweler will take the ring back at any time and give you what you paid for it or what it's worth (which ever is more). So in a way it can actually be a way of saving for later. It's generally not at all, because I would never take a ring back, but I would also not start a marriage with a ring we could not afford, and if we were in a position down the line where we needed money, I would 100% take it back for the money. I would never take it back for a car or something like that, but if something major came up, I think a lot of people would.
Rant over :smile:

OP, if you can afford a place to live, food, a wedding, whatever you need to pay for and this ring will not effect your lifestyle than go for it. If it does then I'd definitely reconsider.
 
#132
ginger123 said:
I think the author's point is that the very desire for a diamond engagement ring was created by aggressive marketing, and many women don't question it--which is fine if one can afford it, but regrettable if it means starting a marriage with debt...
Click to expand...

I agree... Marketing can be the devil because it invades our subconscious, sometimes unknowingly. Perfect examples are the "high-end" boutiques (the red and blue box stores, if you will...) - they typically sell an idea/emotion more so than what a diamond is "worth" at other places, so those consumers pay an even larger premium.
 
#134
I found this article was too basic and ridiculous. Today we can avoid blood diamonds and what about other gemstones that financed war. Also, diamonds stand out for many reasons and take this from a gemologist. Diamonds are the hardest as we all know it and actually John Koivula who is a researcher and chief gemologist for GIA stated that in many ways they are actually the toughest as well (except for of course as we all know it from certain angles they can be chipped, cracked and broken in half but this is rare). Sapphies and rubies are considered the toughest but according to Koivula diamonds actually withstand tests corundums do not. So diamonds are unique, they are actually very hard to damage especially if you consider how much you would spend on a designer dress or purse, etc. and how easy they would be to damage. Diamonds withstand time and hence I do believe they can symbolize eternal love. The author never mentioned their unparalelled beauty, the brilliance and fire diamonds possess.

Ok so consider that diamonds are a luxury item, a commodity you use but after years of wear they are still usually in pristine condition, would this stand true for a dress if you wore it every day of your life for years? And yes diamond will keep at least a big chunk of their value even after years whereas your dress may be ripped, stained, faded, burnt or simply no longer fashionable without possessing any intrinsic value. Yet many of us still buy designer dresses for thousands and not worry that they may be worth nothing a year later or worse be completely ruined.

Then, let's go a little further to other points, what about beauty as an intrinsic value and sentimental values? Art is no use either and in many times you have no idea whether the paintinf you love will be worth anything years later, depreciate or go up in value. Jewelry is beautiful too, to me they are pieces of art and gemstones are a miracle the Earth gave us yet we can still use them.

About diamonds as an investment, yes they can be investments as well, as such I believe they are probably the best buy of any item aside maybe real estate. Thanks to the cruel De Beers who controls the market (still does and they bought up Argyle too last year so the author is not really right about this), the De Beers who went into debt to buy up the former Soviet Union's diamonds which was going to be dumped on the market, our diamonds are likely to hold their value quite well for a very long time and actually went up in value 10 % this January as well. Whether they are a good investment or not depends on what you buy and what price you pay for it. But even if you pay many times the value of gold and diamonds, IMHO a piece from Cartier is a piece of art and the name itself will ensure that your item is likely to hold its value realy well did you ever want to sell it at an auction for example. Even if you do not buy a designer piece and you do not need to, with a top quality diamond bought at a fair price that piece will still be worth quite a bit years later after you have used it, enjoyed it and cherished it for years. Just my few cents for now.
 
#135
OVincze said:
But even if you pay many times the value of gold and diamonds, IMHO a piece from Cartier is a piece of art and the name itself will ensure that your item is likely to hold its value realy well did you ever want to sell it at an auction for example. Even if you do not buy a designer piece and you do not need to, with a top quality diamond bought at a fair price that piece will still be worth quite a bit years later after you have used it, enjoyed it and cherished it for years. Just my few cents for now.
Click to expand...

You bring you some good discussion points.

I am one to buy most of my jewelry now through Sotheby's or Christies. No I don't always get exactly what I want at the time I want it. (Have a max amount I'm willing to spend.) However I'm getting designer items at 60 to 80% of what the original buyer paid. I've bought things that I fell in love with I never knew existed.
Few consignors are going to come out a head. People who bought many years ago. The ones who have Cartier panther bracelets probably will. Or JAR items. Some VCA items. Just off the top of my head. Being a dead celebrity know for collecting jewelry helps - Elizabeth Taylor.
Have a 'designer' necklace the original owner paid over $120,000 for, I got it for $25,000 plus 20% commission. (We know someone in the design house who did a little digging.) Looks like new. Love it will have it the rest of my life. My heirs will sell it & get something for it. The big hit was taken buy someone else.

Don't believe in bad mojo coming from a previous owner. That's giving them way too much power. I can make up a rule too. If I now own it, its now lucky.
 
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