Does anyone else get that "guilty feeling?" DH role reversal

BasicBagLady

BasicBagLady

O.G.
Feb 3, 2013
1,274
171
#1
So. I'm in a stange role reversal with my DH! I desperately want a zippy in vernis pomme becasue I'm a nut job and can't stand pulling my mono wallet out of my non mono bags (DE and azur). So, even though I've already spent $3,000 USD on louisvuitton.com in the past 2 month hubby told me to buy one. We can afford it. I'm 36 years old. Why oh why did I argue with him and resist? I decided to sleep on it and woke up this morning and ordered one (YAY!) but I can't help but feel a twinge of guilt. Maybe it's because I went to Catholic grade school, I don't know ;)
Does anyone else ever have this feeling? I think I'm going to put myself on a ban until at least mid summer. (maybe. Just maybe. Or maybe I'll buy a pre loved cles and then ban :graucho:)
 
#2
If you can afford it and not have any debts, why not?

I go through the guilty feeling too... Only because of nosy friends/co-workers/etc. Sometimes they lecture me about how I should have put the money in my retirement fund, or how people who spend that kind of money on a 'bag' are lacking in common sense. Oh, and the occasional "look" i get from strangers when I carry a monogram bag.

Those are my reasons for why I feel so conflicted at times. I don't know. What are we suppose to do? NOT have nice things? :sad:
 
#3
Exactly. We have no debt and we have a good savings (in addition to retirement). I could act like a chipmunk and shovel every last cent into my reitrement, but I think maybe it's best to balance between living life and saving for the future. I am definately at my limit as far as what I feel is personally responsible to spend on luxury for right now and am glad that I didn't "cross the line" rather walked right up to the edge of it. :smile: Thanks for responding, it helps me to hear other women's opinions on the matter.
 
#4
eal76 said:
So. I'm in a stange role reversal with my DH! I desperately want a zippy in vernis pomme becasue I'm a nut job and can't stand pulling my mono wallet out of my non mono bags (DE and azur). So, even though I've already spent $3,000 USD on louisvuitton.com in the past 2 month hubby told me to buy one. We can afford it. I'm 36 years old. Why oh why did I argue with him and resist? I decided to sleep on it and woke up this morning and ordered one (YAY!) but I can't help but feel a twinge of guilt. Maybe it's because I went to Catholic grade school, I don't know ;)
Does anyone else ever have this feeling? I think I'm going to put myself on a ban until at least mid summer. (maybe. Just maybe. Or maybe I'll buy a pre loved cles and then ban :graucho:)
Click to expand...
Sounds like crazy jewish guilt! This is what we jewish people do too. We can make ourselves guilty over everything!:amuse:
 
#5
I always feel that way too but have to remind myself to just ENJOY and be happy we are in a position to be able to buy these things! Going thru the same issue about a vernis cles...just bought a new one but want to return to get a used one because I feel guilty about spending so much on such a small item, even tho I will use it everyday!

I don't think a little bit of guilt is a bad thing...keeps me in check a little and makes me analyze things rather than just spend, spend, spend!
 
#6
I felt guilty last year, I don't even want to think about the amount of luxury items I bought in a 6 month span. But at the the same time,I work, DH works, nice savings, and nice retirement plans. I did realize though I need to happy with I have so after I buy my HG Chanel gst in 2 months I'm done for the year, with handbags only lol.
 
#7
Haha I do the same thing.

Last October we went on a holiday to the States. We saved heaps of money with the intention of spending, and yet I would pick up something and by the time I make it to the counter say "oh maybe I don't really need it." DH was there going, "you don't have anything like this, it's cheap compared to back home- buy it, we have the money!"

I'm going to LV today to finally get my wallet (hopefully) after getting my first bag less than a month ago. I have not been able to stop thinking about it and spent the last 3 weeks saving. (Making sure I didn't spend it silly things so that I had the money). DH is fully supportive but every second night I'm like, "but... Should I really? It's so expensive for a wallet and we have this this and that coming up." DH's standard response is "we have the money, you have saved, you will use it everyday- GET IT!" LOL!

So I orally understand how you feel!
 
#8
I can only speak for myself, but I think it's more anxiety than true "guilt". Personally I feel anxious about 2 things when I make a new purchase: 1)What friends and family will say when they find out I've bought yet another "needless" LV item... and 2)The fact that the money could have been used for something more "constructive", or saved. Then I tell myself to shut up, and I'm usually fine lol
 
#9
I just get guilt, because I feel like the money could have been saved. When I see a number in my savings,and then check it a few days after an LV purchase and its a thousand or more less, I have a heart attack.
 
#10
woodscape6 said:
Sounds like crazy jewish guilt! This is what we jewish people do too. We can make ourselves guilty over everything!:amuse:
Click to expand...

OMG this is perfect; what I neglected to mention is that I'm half Jewish (by blood, and according to the mother of a Jewish doctor I used to date that was good enough for marrying her son!lol!!! OMG if I were the marrying for money type I'd be living on the upper East side right now but I digress) and half Catholic. I've always said that my guilty and anxiety issues come from being hit with the guilt from my two parents' religions!!!
 
#11
Men's Tumbler said:
I can only speak for myself, but I think it's more anxiety than true "guilt". Personally I feel anxious about 2 things when I make a new purchase: 1)What friends and family will say when they find out I've bought yet another "needless" LV item... and 2)The fact that the money could have been used for something more "constructive", or saved. Then I tell myself to shut up, and I'm usually fine lol
Click to expand...

Great point. I'm diagnosed with anxiety disorder so I think you hit the nail on the head. I won't take ativan so I'll just ride it out. As soon as miss Pomme arrives I'm likely to get over it in a hurry!
 
#14
I always feel a little more guilt when my spouse encourages the purchase.
Like you, it's not the money...it's just that someone has to argue the point! Even as I type I have a leather skirt in a virtual shopping bag that my husband told me to buy this morning....all day I kept resisting making the purchase! Ugh.
 
#15
My mum always told me 'guilt is a wasted emotion' if you've got it, buy it and enjoy it! The world could end tomorrow (ok it won't) but we can't take it with us so make the most of those nice things and never feel guilty just enjoy enjoy enjoy!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top
Back